Epoch (Transcend Duet #2)(41)

Griff winks at me. He’s thinking of the long weekend we spent in bed. Yeah, that was pretty spectacular too. A rewind button on life would be nice. I’d replay those four days over and over again.

“It was lovely.” I borrow Griffin’s word. “How about you? Did you have a nice Thanksgiving?”

“I did. It took a bit to find a few living friends, but I scrounged three and we had quite the time.”

Griffin and I chuckle.

She serves us tea and takes a seat behind her desk. An easy smile settles on her face. “When Swayze emailed me, I was very happy to hear that you would be joining us, Griffin.”

He answers with an easy nod just before taking a sip of his tea.

“So you’re thinking about trying hypnosis?”

“Yes. I just wanted to bring Griffin in case he had any questions. I tried to explain it to him as best as I could, but I’m not the expert on it.”

“Ah, then I assume Swayze discussed the possible benefits as well as the risks?”

“Can I be frank?” Griffin asks.

“Please,” Dr. Albright continues to smile.

I draw in a slow breath and hold it. What does he need to be frank about?

“I’m not one hundred percent buying into the reincarnation thing. The only reason I’m even considering it as a possibility is because I can’t really give a better explanation. Do you honestly believe Swayze is this Morgan Daisy Gallagher reincarnated?”

“It’s perfectly normal to question it, the same way people question God or all the beliefs about how we originated and where we go beyond this life. So all I can offer you is my opinion. And my opinion, both professional and personal, is that Swayze’s soul and part of Daisy’s soul share space in the beautiful body sitting next to you. I believe we are fabrics of many lifetimes.”

Yeah, that doesn’t sound crazy at all. I can’t see past the stoic expression on his face to determine if he finds the “beautiful body” sitting next to him to be as much of a magical unicorn as what Dr. Albright tries to lead him to believe.

I rest my white hoof on his hand and wag my long tail, sending a rainbow of glitter in all directions.

“So let’s pretend you’re right.”

My lips press into a firm line, and I talk my eyes out of rolling in disbelief.

This woman is highly educated, incredibly wise from years of living, and the picture of a sage. Yet, Griffin only wants to pretend she’s right. This isn’t going as smoothly as I’d hoped.

“Won’t digging up old memories, like death, be pretty traumatic? She’s twenty-two. Is it smart to risk that kind of psychological trauma?”

“It is a risk. That’s why I want Swayze to really think this over before making a decision. She could remember things she saw, but she could also relive the feelings.”

“But that’s just it,” I interrupt. “It’s driving me crazy to have these images but no feelings or emotions attached to them.”

Griffin turns to me. “So you want to remember what it felt like to die? Or worse … to be murdered?”

“No. But I’d rather remember the feelings than let another woman actually die at his hands. And it’s not just that. There were good times too. I hate seeing them in my head but not feeling them like Daisy did. This familiarity keeps clawing its way to the surface of my conscience like it wants to be felt. Like it needs to be felt.”

He scoffs, shaking his head while looking away from me. “Good times? You mean Nate.” He says his name with such contempt. “You want to remember how you felt about him?”

I glance up at Dr. Albright, but she doesn’t look like she’s ready to jump in the pool and save me from drowning.

“Not in the way you think, Griff.”

Griffin gives Dr. Albright his attention. “Please tell me you don’t condone this. We’re engaged. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, but I don’t want to compete with another man for her feelings.”

She returns a concentrated nod. “Swayze, can you elaborate on the kind of feelings you want to remember. If they’re not romantic feelings, then maybe you can set Griffin’s mind at ease a little bit.”

The muscle twitching in Griffin’s jaw says I won’t be easing his mind anytime soon, but I try anyway.

“We were young. And before there were any feelings of love, we were friends. Sometimes I think the reason this other life moved forward with some memories intact is because I’m here to do something for Nate.” I’m not saying this right.

Griffin’s expression goes from irritated to murderous.

I hold up a flat hand to keep him from losing it. “He feels responsible for Daisy’s death. And her murderer is still killing. And a baby lost her mom. The timing is too coincidental. I think I have these memories to deal with Doug Mann, and take care of Morgan, and let Nate know that it wasn’t his fault. His wife died. When I first saw him at Dr. Greyson’s office, I could tell he was hanging by a thread.”

With his thumb and middle finger, Griffin massages his temples.

“If I may make a suggestion…” Dr. Albright folds her arms on the edge of her desk “…think about you first, Swayze. What you want. What you need. What you’re really willing to risk. Try to ignore any sense of debt to anyone else or the fear of guilt over Doug Mann. What is the one thing you really need from this?”