Epoch (Transcend Duet #2)(34)
“Because if you’re Daisy with him, then Swayze is not cheating on her fiancé.”
“Mom …” I frown. “That’s not what’s happening. I’m not cheating on Griffin.”
“Have you crossed the line with Nate?”
I’m not sure if I should be offended that she doesn’t trust me or elated that she’s protecting Griffin. Pushing out of my chair, I finish making the sandwich she started. “You’ll have to explain this line.”
“Have you kissed him?”
“No.”
He’s kissed me on the head, but that doesn’t count. Does it?
“Do you want to kiss him?”
I finish cutting the sandwich in half and set the knife off to the side, pausing a moment to hold back my knee-jerk reaction. This is my mom, the person who loves me unconditionally. She loves me if I meet Griffin at the altar. She loves me if he leaves me tomorrow. I don’t have to hide from her.
“I love Griffin. There has not been one day since we met that I’ve questioned wanting to be with him—not since I met Nate, not since I’ve acknowledge my past, not when we’ve fought, not yesterday, not today, and I won’t question it tomorrow.”
“But?”
My gaze shifts from the knife to my mom. “But Nate has become my obsession.”
We both move our attention to the photo.
“I can’t shut off my brain, but the one thing that scares me more than the deluge of memories is this insatiable curiosity.”
“About?” She shoots me a sidelong glance.
Biting my lips together, I search for a way to explain this without it sounding like I want it to happen. “I wonder what his lips would feel like pressed to my neck where he used to kiss her … or me. I wonder if it would bring forth more memories.”
“Or start a fire that would burn down your whole world?” Her eyebrows lift, giving me that motherly-warning look.
“Yeah … or that.”
“Do I need to give you the curiosity-killed-the-cat speech?”
I shake my head.
“Do you think that Griffin might be right? Maybe you should find another job. I know it won’t change the memories you have, but it would eliminate the temptation.”
I grab half of my sandwich and take a bite. “You make it sound like I’m going to hop in bed with him,” I mumble.
“Can we talk woman to woman?”
I shrug.
“You’re carrying around a shirtless picture of him in your pocket. I just worry that if he put those lips on your neck, you’d wonder what they’d feel like in other places. Where would it stop, if not in his bed?”
“It’s not going there.” I don’t mean to sound so prickly. “We’re friends, but more than that, Morgan is attached to me and I’m attached to her too. The fact is he needs me to take care of her, and I need a job. I like my job. And in a non-jumping-in-his-bed way, Nate and Morgan feel like extended family.”
“I’m your family. Griffin, his parents, and his sisters are your family. We love you. This cannot end well, and you know it. And if what you said about Doug Mann is correct, it’s not safe for you to be anywhere he can easily find you. Tomorrow you need to go back to the police and plead your case, make them understand. Honey, Griffin isn’t trying to tear you away from Nate and Morgan, he’s trying to protect you.”
“The police are not going to buy my reincarnation story no matter how hard I try to sell it. And I’m not going to spend the rest of my life running. I want to figure something out so I don’t have to leave my home.”
“Your home or Nate?”
I bite my tongue because it’s covered in defensive words that won’t justify anything.
“I need to get home.”
With a sad, defeated smile, Mom pulls me in for a hug. “I’m on your side no matter what. All I want is for you to be happy.”
“Thank you.”
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
“Nice to see you again, Swayze. Please, have a seat.”
“Thank you.” I take my seat across from Dr. Albright. I like her. She’s warm and approachable.
“Tea?”
“I’m good, but thank you.”
“How have things been since we last talked?”
“Interesting I suppose is the best word. I told Nate that I think Daisy was murdered. He wasn’t real receptive at first, in fact, he was quite angry, but I think we’re good now. He’s worried about Doug. And I think he’s frustrated that the only proof we have is that of a twenty-two-year-old girl who claims to be his dead friend’s reincarnated soul. The police aren’t receptive to that.”
She nods once before sipping her tea.
“I told my mom everything too. I think the hardest part for me is all the gaps that I haven’t been able to fill in yet.”
“We could try to fill some of them in with hypnosis, but you’d need to be sure it’s what you really want. There are pros and cons with it. You would need to decide if the benefits outweigh the risks.”
I wring my hands in my lap. “What are the pros?”
“Possible increased memory of certain events. Deeper understanding. Validation. Maybe even what it would take to put a murderer behind bars.”