Drive Me Wild (Bellamy Creek #1)(69)

“No. When you leave, this is over.”

“Why? We’re good together, Griffin. At least we were up until five minutes ago.”

“And then what?” I asked, growing agitated, because I didn’t know how to make her understand. “We keep seeing each other, and then what?”

“I don’t know! We just see where it goes.”

“But there’s a limit, Blair. There’s a limit to how far we can take this. We don’t want the same things.” I pointed at her. “You want a fairy tale, and I’m no prince.”

“That’s not true!”

“Yes, it is. Your ten-year plan doesn’t look anything like mine.”

“But things could change,” she wept. “Couldn’t they?”

“No.” I started pacing at the foot of the bed. “See, this is why I have the rules. And if I would have fucking stuck to them and kept my hands to myself, this wouldn’t be happening.”

“But you created those rules for yourself when you were hurting—you needed to heal before you could move on.”

“I needed to be real about what I was capable of,” I said harshly, turning to face her. “And you do too.”

She shrank back almost as if I’d slapped her. “So it really was just about the sex for you?”

I looked down at her crying on the bed, and my hands clenched into fists. My arms ached to hold her. But all that would do was postpone the inevitable. “Yes,” I lied, knowing I’d never forgive myself for hurting her this way. “You were right all along. I was lonely, and you were here—I took advantage of it, and I’m sorry.”

“Liar!” she cried, jumping to her feet. “You’re not sorry! All your apologies are lies. I thought you were different, but you’re just like everyone else. I never should have trusted you.”

Her words cut me to the bone. She was right—I was a liar, but not in the way she thought.

And I didn’t have money or fame or status, but I had honor, and it killed me to let her think otherwise. But before I could defend myself—if it was even possible—she raced out of the bedroom and yanked the door shut behind her.

With a heavy sadness I hadn’t felt since losing my dad, I sank down onto the bed, head in my hands.

I was alone again.

But it felt terrible.





Eighteen





Blair





First thing I did was throw out that stupid anniversary cake, hurling it into the trash with all the might I could muster.

Asshole! How could you do this to me?

Then I spent the night curled into one corner of the couch, crying my eyes out. Bisou eventually found her way over to me and snuggled up in my lap, but it only made me bawl harder.

God, I was so dumb! So naive! Of course he was just in it for the sex! When had a guy ever truly felt something for me, felt it enough to commit to something that would last?

Never. That was the hard truth. Yet I’d been sucked into believing in the possibility, because deep down, Griffin was right—I was nothing but a little girl who wanted to believe in fairy tales.

“Maybe it’s time for some rules of my own, Bisou,” I whispered fiercely to the cat. “Number one—no more believing everything a man says, because they lie. All of them.”

The cat meowed in agreement.

“Number two—I will work and save, so that I am never dependent on a man again. I will always be able to support myself.”

The cat raised a paw, almost like she wanted a high five, so I gave her one.

Then I thought for a moment. “And number three—I will not get my heart set on anything, because it never ends well.”

Bisou was silent, and another sob worked its way up from my chest. Burying my face in a pillow so Griffin wouldn’t hear me, I cried until my eyes ran dry, and I fell asleep.





When I woke up the next morning, Griffin was gone. With a lump in my throat and horribly puffy eyes, I walked to the bathroom, which was where I discovered I’d gotten my period.

Relieved that at least I didn’t have to worry about an unplanned pregnancy, I cleaned up, got dressed, and packed my suitcase. Then I sat on the bed and called Frannie MacAllister.

“Hello?”

“Hi Frannie. It’s Blair Beaufort.”

“Hey, Blair! How are things?”

“They’re fine.” I swallowed hard. “Listen, my plans have changed a little, and it turns out I can move up to Cloverleigh Farms sooner than I thought.”

“Oh.” A beat went by. “Are you okay?”

“Well, yes and no,” I said. “Physically, I’m okay, but something happened, and I need to leave Bellamy Creek.” To my horror, I started crying again. “I’m sorry, Frannie. This is so embarrassing. But if I can get myself up to Cloverleigh today, would the apartment possibly be ready for me now?”

“Absolutely,” she said. “But how are you going to get here? Is your car fixed?”

I’d told Frannie the story of getting stranded in Bellamy Creek during my interview. At the time, we’d thought it was funny. She’d guessed at my feelings for Griffin based on the way I spoke about him, and we’d laughed that if things worked out, we’d have quite the story for our grandchildren someday. Now it seemed ridiculous I’d even entertained the idea of a future together.