Darkness at the Edge of Town (Iris Ballard #2)(84)

I wasn’t going to continue arguing. If they sent me checks I’d never cash them. I should have known something else was going on with her beyond Billy and me. I should have. I was a psychologist, for fuck’s sake. She needed help and I just fed her beast. I wouldn’t make that mistake again.



“Well, now that we’re all friends again, Agent Hudson, would you like to hear about the time Iris got her first confession from a perp at age sixteen?” Joyce asked.

“More than anything in the world,” he said before smiling over at me.

I grinned back.

The rest of the evening was lovely. The food was delicious, the laughter abounded, and I didn’t really care that most of the jokes came at my expense. Everyone had an embarrassing Iris story to share, even Luke. I’d forgotten about the time we were involved in a body search and I had a stomach bug and had to crap in the woods three times. Good times. I did get him back with the story of me catching him with my Academy roommate Julie giving him a blow job off one of the running trails. Even in the dark I could see him turn red. He playfully kicked me under the table, and I kicked him back. It had been forever since I just sat around the table talking and laughing with people I liked. Years. I’d forgotten how nice it could be. I kept glancing at Luke, and there wasn’t a time when he didn’t have a smile on his face. He must have been doing the same with me because once or twice our eyes caught, prompting our smiles to grow even more. The urge to kiss him never waned.

After everyone’s steaks were devoured, Joyce stood up. “Ready for dessert? In honor of our two gumshoes here, I bought doughnuts.” We all laughed. “Stack your plates and I’ll get them out of the way.”



“I can help with that,” Luke offered, “since I didn’t bring anything.”

“Nonsense. You brought your charming self. Iris can help me.”

“But I brought my charming self too,” I said to another round of chuckles.

“Come on. Help an old woman out.”

I rose from the table and collected all the dirty plates and forks. I knew what she was doing but obliged anyway. Lecture time. We’d barely stepped inside the kitchen when she pounced. “Iris, you have to marry that man ASAP.”

Okay, I wasn’t expecting that. “Uh…what?”

“You heard me. You need to scoop that man up yesterday. He won’t wait forever, you know. In fact I’m shocked he’s waited this long.”

My mouth flopped open. “Joyce, what the hell are you talking about?”

“Oh, don’t you play dumb. Any fool can see it. That man’s crazy about you. Hell, he’s in love with you. Your grandmother said he has been for years. Oh, goodness, girl, don’t look at me like that. I’m not saying anything you don’t know already.”

“I…I-I don’t.”

“Then you’re blind. Willfully blind. And I understand why. You were married. You loved your husband. He was such a sweet boy. I truly liked him. And part of you will always love him, as you should. He will always be in your heart. But he’s gone, sweetie. And he’d want you to be happy. That’s what we all want for you. What happened with him broke your spirit, but if I had to guess, that man out there helped you heal it. And I know you’re still fragile. One knock and you’re in pieces again. But that knock won’t come from that man out there, I guaran-damn-tee it. If anything, when it does come, he’ll help hold you together. You just have to be brave and let him. Let him or you will regret it for the rest of your life. Be brave.” She looked me square in the eye and repeated, “Be brave.”



I couldn’t move. I couldn’t blink. I’d gone almost catatonic. I knew. Of course I knew. I’d known for years. I’d just refused to acknowledge it. I think he had too. It was the only way we could stay friends, stay partners. Because I was married. I loved Luke, but I was in love with my husband. Hayden had my heart. And every time I felt jealousy meeting one of Luke’s many girlfriends, I told myself I wasn’t jealous, I was concerned he’d end up with someone unworthy. If you say something enough times you can believe anything. Even after we’d slept together, I convinced myself it was just because he was the only one there. He could have been anyone. It meant nothing. I’d kept that illusion alive for years too. Until he walked back into my life. And since he had, every word, every gesture, every smile chipped away ten years of denial. And Joyce had just taken a sledgehammer to the wall. Yet…

“I…can’t do this tonight,” I said. “I can’t. I can’t. I’m sorry.” I literally turned my back on her and quickly retreated outside. But he was there. Gazing up at me with a smile on his gorgeous face.

He’s in love with me.

“Hey, you okay?” Luke asked.

“I…” He’s in love with me. “I-I’m really light-headed. I think I need to go to home. I need to sleep.”



“It has been a long day,” Grandma said.

Luke studied my face, but I looked away. I didn’t want to be on the same planet as him.

“Everything okay out here?” Joyce asked as she stepped out.

“Looks like everyone’s taking their doughnuts to go,” Don said.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Mom asked me.