Chaser (Dive Bar #3)(76)

“I don’t care.” I grinned. “You know what those hedgehog pajamas do to me.”

Mom cleared her throat. “Jean, I’m terribly sorry about this. And Eric, honey, it’s really not right to descend on people at eight in the morning without warning them first. I thought I raised you a little better than that.”

“But you’ve been dying to hang out with the baby.”

“Even so,” said Mom, kneeling beside Ada’s play mat. “I hope you don’t mind, Jean, if I quickly say hello to her?”

“You’re very welcome to stay for coffee, Audrey,” said Jean. “It’s lovely to meet you.”

“See?” I said, not that I’m sure anyone was listening to me right then. “Everything’s fine.”

Jean grabbed my arm. “Let’s make coffee, Eric.”

“Sure thing.”

“What’s going on?” she asked in a lower voice while Mom got chatting with Ada. It was a mostly one-sided conversation, but Mom didn’t seem to mind.

“Well,” I said. “I was reading in the baby book last night about how important multigenerational influences can be for creating a stable and secure environment for children to grow in. You seemed worried about your parents living so far away and everything. Them not being able to have the kind of close relationship you had with your grandma. So I thought … we need to get Ada and Mom together.”

“You thought all of that, huh?”

“I did.” I smiled. “You should see what Mom’s like every time I go over there. It’s always, ‘Show me pictures of the baby.’ I’m pretty sure she doesn’t give a damn about me at all anymore. Ever since Ada was born, it’s all about her. Honestly, I feel a little neglected.”

Jean relaxed, the line between her brows fading. “I think it’s lovely she wanted to meet her. But eight in the morning?”

“Too early?”

“Just a little,” she said. “And you couldn’t give me any warning?”

“You had the towel on the door last night so I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“Okay.” She sighed. “Let me go brush my teeth and put on some clothes. We’re not finished talking about this.”

“About what?”

“You rush over here first thing with your mom the day after you find out about my parents wanting me to move back to Florida?” Jean crossed her arms. “I’m meant to think there’s no connection there? Seriously?”

I mimicked the movement. “It’s not what your parents want that keeps me up half the night with worry, sweetheart. It’s trying to figure out what you want.”

It was like someone slowly let the air out of her. Her jaw dropped a little, followed by her shoulders. Then she was pressed up against me, holding me tight. And saying something into my shirt, if I wasn’t mistaken.

“What was that?” I asked.

Over on the living room floor, Mom did a great job of pretending to ignore us. Ada started fussing and she picked her up, singing her some old song. Not Janis. I’d have to tell her later that Janis was Ada’s jam.

“Jean?”

“I said…” She leaned her chin on my chest, looking up at me with wet eyes. “It was meant to be casual.”

“Yeah, I know.” I shrugged. “But shit happens.”

The woman snorted. “Shit happens?”

With my arms wrapped around her, I rested my forehead against hers. “Is this why you jumped me on the kitchen counter the night before last? When I was asking you about the other things in your life, and you said you wanted friends with benefits? Because you were already thinking about Florida, and you wanted to keep it casual?”

Her eyelids shut tight. “Maybe,” she admitted. “It was so frustrating that us being together came out at the party, when at the same time I’m wrestling with maybe going back home. So part of me just wanted it to be physical and fun. It would make everything so much easier.”

“Look at me. It’s okay.”

“You’re not angry or anything?”

“How hypocritical would that be?” I said. “I’ve spent my life keeping it casual to keep things easy.”

“Hmm.” She opened her eyes. “That didn’t actually answer my question.”

“The question is, is casual still what you want?”

She pressed her ear against my chest, listening to my heartbeat or something. I don’t know.

“Because this isn’t casual for me, Jean. I want you to know that.”

“Ada and I are going on a diaper changing adventure,” announced Mom in a singsong voice. Way more cheerful than the topic warranted, honestly.

“Nursery’s on the right and everything’s in there,” I said. “Thanks, Mom.”

“Off we go then!”

Glad poop got her so excited. Christ knows, I was more than happy to avoid it if possible.

“Your mom must think I’m so weird,” said Jean in a quiet voice.

“No, mostly I think she’s upset at me for dragging her out of bed to come visiting so early without even warning you. It was a major crime against manners,” I said, resting my head against her hair.