Boy Parts(14)

Unreal tbh. Told him to fuck off down the pub and cool off. Like my feelings for her aside, I WOULD NOT CHEAT ON HIM and it’s not like he knows about it so wtf. Like where does this come from and why does he have this HUGE PROBLEM all of a sudden w my best friend who happens to be another queer woman. He swears its not a bi thing n he just doesnt like irina or ‘how she speaks to me’ but like,,, she never tried to police who i hang out w.

So he was on the sofa tonight but i let him come back to bed. Still annoyed tho.





WILL




Flo shrieks along to the entirety of Lizzo’s ‘Good as Hell’, and I wince. Her ‘THIS IS A GAYS ONLY EVENT, GO HOME’ playlist, finishes, then loops, and takes us back in with ‘Cool For The Summer’, which I just hate. The homoerotic over-current of the lyrics while we’re both in sat in the living room in our bras and curlers is just… It’s a lot.

‘Come and do my eyeliner for me,’ says Flo.

‘Come and do my eyeliner for me,’ I repeat, with a sneer.

‘I never get it as good as you do. You’re baking, you have time.’ She’s got me there; powder is piled up on my cheekbones and cannot be disturbed for at least a few minutes.

‘Fine.’ I shuffle over to her on my knees and sit between her thighs. Nothing gay about this. Just a pair of regular gal pals here. Her lips are slightly parted.

I rest my hand on Flo’s shoulder for balance, and there’s this sharp little intake of breath down her end. Demi warbles in the background. I tell Flo to stay still, and gently sweep the liquid liner from the corner of her eye, so it almost meets the point of her eyebrow. Always looks a bit daft when I do that, but she likes it.

I’m almost waiting for her to lean in and whisper, Oh, Irina, remember the summer that we were ‘cool’? Flo licks her lips. I could slap her – she’s posting about it on her fucking blog again. I can practically see her having flashbacks. For the record: we were never cool for the summer. We were more… lukewarm for the September/October period.

I hate that she tells people. I hate that she fucking blogs about it, like my sex life is just fucking Tumblr discourse for her. You know, for someone who claims to be woke, she truly does not give a flying fuck about consent the second it comes to flapping her skinny lips about my personal business.

‘Did I tell you Serotonin is going to be at the Hackney thing?’

‘No,’ says Flo. ‘She’s quite big now, isn’t she? Like, doesn’t she live in New York?’

‘I think so. It’ll be nice to see her again. I used to be—’ I move from Flo’s left eye to her right. ‘—so close to her. Weird we didn’t really keep in contact.’ Flo hums. She fucking hated Sera. It was very transparent – a lot of ‘I suppose you’re busy with her’ when I told Flo I couldn’t speak to her on the phone. I always assumed making exactly one new friend was one of the main reasons we stopped speaking for a bit while I was in London and she wasn’t.

Ariana Grande kicks in next. ‘Greedy’. Flo’s eyeliner is finished, and I shuffle back to my corner of the room.

‘I’m not doing your falsies for you,’ I tell her, and I brush the powder off my cheeks. When the chorus to the song kicks in, I sing ‘greedy for cum’ instead of ‘greedy for love’; I do it every time that line pops up, and I do it specifically because Flo thinks it’s disgusting.

I’ve gone for a bronzy eyeshadow look – everything else tends to be a bit clashy when you’re ginger. Flo’s hair is bobbed, and bleached to shit, but it does mean she has a lot more by way of eyeshadow choices. She’s gone for purple tonight.

‘Should I do a red lip?’

‘If you want to look like a slapper, then aye, absolutely,’ I say. Flo has no taste; she just copies. If left to her own devices, she’d wear total trash. And not trash in a good way, like when I do trash.

‘Don’t you think it’ll look quite editorial?’

‘Not on your bone structure, no,’ I say. Flo is… cute. Like, she’s pretty but she’s not stunning, she’s not beautiful. ‘You’ve got those round baby cheeks. You’ll just look like you’ve made a mess with your mam’s makeup.’

‘Hmm. You’re probably right,’ she says. ‘Nude lip?’

‘If you pair it with, like, a lilac and wear a blush with kind of a lavender tone… that’d look… like, editorial without looking super OTT.’

‘Genius,’ she says. I don’t think she has the bone structure to pull off a monotone makeup look either, but I’m wearing a nude lip tonight, and I’d rather we didn’t match. She’s always trying to match me. I never tell her what I’m wearing.

A knock on Flo’s door – probably Finch. She sticks on a dressing gown before she trots over to answer.

I’m right. He looks cute tonight. Concealer on his acne, and a half-open shirt. He’s been very determined to be as shirtless as possible since his recent top surgery. Fresh haircut too. Short back and sides, heavy on top. Not very exciting; I think that’s the only haircut barbers are doing at the moment. I’ve offered to let him model for me, but he said no, even though he’s a bit of an Irina Sturges fanboy. I think he caught on I was just interested in the novelty factor – or maybe he was just shy. This was years ago, though, early transition. His skin’s been consistently garbage since he went on testosterone; I’ve fully lost interest.