Beyond a Darkened Shore(105)

“You may have your opinions on my choice of alliances,” I said, “but I must know: Will you contest my claim for the throne?”

Her back stiffened. “I don’t really have a choice, do I?” At my look, she sighed. “No,” she said, the word sounding as though it was wrenched from her forcefully. “Girls?”

Deirdre wrapped her slim arms around me once more, and I kissed the top of her fair head. “Go, now. I’ll come find you later.”

“I’m glad you’re home, Ciara,” Deirdre said before hurrying after her mother.

Branna hung back, her eyes still on Arin. “Will I see you at dinner?”

He glanced at Leif once before nodding. “I hope so.”

Perhaps it was in our blood to find the Olafsson men irresistible. Smiling, I gave Branna a little nudge. “Better go before Máthair comes looking for you.”

Branna threw her arms around me again. “I prayed every night you’d come home, Ciara.”

“And I prayed I’d come home to you,” I said with a kiss on her head. “Now, go.”

When she was out of sight, I shifted my attention to my undead army. “There is something I must do,” I said to Leif.

“This is a mistake,” Leif said later, when I had assembled my undead clansmen in the remains of our chapel. They stood emotionlessly, though they stood upon the ashes of their violent deaths.

I shook my head as I pulled the Sword of the Fallen free. “This is what must be done.”

“And if your kingdoms are challenged and you need them again?”

I turned to him with a hint of an ironic smile. “I’m surprised, Leif. I would think you of all people should realize that if I cannot hold these lands with my own power, then I don’t deserve to have them at all.”

He crossed his arms over his chest obstinately. “They are part of your power.”

In answer, I sliced the palm of my hand across the blade of my sword. It thrummed loudly as my blood was absorbed. This time, the words came to me without having to be told.

“So the Phantom Queen’s blood flows in my veins, so do I release you from your oath to me. No longer will you be forced to walk upon the earth. Instead, I leave you free to rest in peace.”

An explosive boom rent the air, and the men before us shattered into a cloud of ash. Sadness and regret fell upon me like a veil, but over it all was a feeling of peace—the peace I had granted my clansmen, and the peace I felt for doing what was right. My atonement for the death of so many had only just begun—

The soft step of a leather shoe on ash alerted me to someone’s presence, and I turned to find the graying form of Father Briain. As his gaze drifted over the remains of the chapel, I realized just how terribly lost he must feel.

“It will be rebuilt,” I said, my voice quiet but strong.

His rheumy eyes met mine, the relief on his face profound. “As queen, you will be welcome in the new chapel.”

It would be many years before I would feel welcome in church—if ever—but I said nothing of this to Father Briain, only smiled and touched his shoulder as I passed by.

But as I walked outside, another pile of ashes halted me as suddenly as though I’d been shot with an arrow.

“Sleipnir,” I whispered, echoes of the first time I found him broken and bloodied on the battlefield reverberating through me. How could I have forgotten he was as bound to my blood sacrifice as the others?

Though as I touched what was left of my courageous warhorse, there was a part of me that knew this was how it was meant to be. For how long could I have kept an undead skeletal horse with a gruesome appetite for flesh? I mourned him for what he once was. Losing him again ripped open old wounds, old losses: my father, Fergus and Conall, my clansmen, even my mother, who was never really mine to lose.

But as Leif wrapped an arm around me in silent comfort, I swore I would forge a new life, one of peace.





30





That night after a strained dinner with Máthair that tensed every muscle in my body, and then a subsequent two hours practicing sword fighting with Leif that finally siphoned my energy, I stumbled into my room with Leif, weary to the bone—until his gaze met mine.

“It becomes difficult not to touch you when you look at me like that,” Leif said.

Another two weeks at sea with him had stolen any notion for propriety I might have had. When the red haze of desire flared, I fanned the flames. “Who says you can’t touch me?”

He let out a cross between a laugh and a groan before reaching for me. The kiss was hurried, desperate, but as we pulled back for a breath, his touches became gentle. He traced the line of my jaw, pressing kisses along the side of my neck. I helped him out of his tunic and chain mail, and he reached for the fastenings of my armor.

“You’ll have little need for armor now,” he said, putting it to the side as he removed each piece.

I lay down on the bed with a sigh. “Oh? And what would you have me wear instead?”

“Nothing.” He pressed a kiss to my bare shoulder. “But I don’t think you’d agree.”

My lips curled into a smile. “You’re right.”

“Then let me dress you as I would my wife,” he said, pressing another kiss to the hollow of my throat, “with gold and furs and silk.”