Behind the Mask: A Rockstar Romance(33)

“Music comes easier for you. You can sing, dance, play the guitar like the devil.” She laughs. “I had to work extra hard to figure it out. You learned it so easily. Music is in your blood. Your voice, though…” She pauses. “If the band ever heard you sing, they would have made you join. But the band is mine. It belonged to me. I was scared that I would be thrown in the background. Growing up, Mom and Dad praised you, bragged about you, saying you are going to touch the hearts of many with your voice. They never said that about me.” Tears fall down her cheeks. I never knew about any of this. This does explain a lot on why she always stopped me when I wanted to sing.

“I would never take your band away from you. I just wanted to play.”

“I know. I just couldn’t risk it. I didn’t want you to actually leave, though.”

“I wish you talked to me. Things could have been different between us, but I made up my mind. Once the three weeks are over, I’m leaving, but I will see you in concerts if you are ever in the area.” I smile at her, and she hugs me once more.

“You better. I will make sure you get VIP treatment.”

“We better, or I will make a scene at the show,” Naomi adds.

“Thank you, Naomi, for being there for my sister.”

“Now you know my name.” Naomi laughs. “Your sister is amazing.”

I feel myself blush by all these compliments.

“She is. I just don’t know who is going to make sure I get to bed after a party.”

We all laugh.

“It looks like you need to get a new PA, but you probably want to give them pay rises often as you are all pigs,” I say and we burst into laughter.

“This is a magical bathroom, but if we don’t leave soon, the guys are going to think we’re planning world domination or something.” Naomi opens the door. I walk out, but I feel Tegan holding my hand.

“I do love you. I always have, even during my bitchiness.”

“I always loved you, even though you went all diva.”

She smiles at me and we head to the couch, both of us plonking down. Troy and Sam look at us with their mouths hanging open.

Changes are on their way.

Definitely on the way.





It is time for my first show and I have never been so nervous in my whole entire life. I’m in the waiting area, waiting to be told to go on. No wonder Nate gets a little stage fright every now and then, as this is nerve-wrecking.

I am wearing black leather pants with a leather crop top, my hair in messy waves, giving it that just had sex look. Pressing my fingers against the mask to make sure it’s in place, I start pacing the room.

Oh my God, I can’t do this.

Why did I think I could?

I’m having a panic attack.

“Calm down.” Tegan stands in front of me. “You can do this.”

Why does it feel like I’m not breathing in enough air?

“No, you were right, you told me how hard this is. I’m going to go out there and choke. What was I thinking? Tegan, I can’t do this.” I feel myself starting to tear up then press my hand against my chest, feeling my heartbeat going a million times an hour.

Tegan pulls me into a hug, stroking my hair. “I only said it because I was being a bitch. You know the songs, you rehearsed. Just go out there and only concentrate on the music, not the people. Just you and the guitar. I will be at the wing waiting for you,” she reassures me.

“What if I mess up?” I dab under my eyes with my finger.

“Then you take a deep breath and start over.”

I nod.

“We all mess up. We just need to learn to take control over the situation.”

Travis soon walks in the room telling us they are ready for us. Travis gives me a wink and already I feel a little sick.

“You got this.”

“Girl, come on, show the world what you got.” Naomi bounces in. “What’s wrong?” The smile on her face falls.

“She’s nervous.”

“You are going to be great. Remember the mask you are wearing is armor. You aren’t Blair, you are Star. The sexy, hot guitarist.” I laugh at Naomi’s attempt for a pep talk.

We walk toward the stage area. “Okay, I can do this. You two don’t move from your spots.” I point to them. They cross their hearts.

Sam and Troy fling their arms around my shoulders as we walk closer to the stage. I can see the crowd already. Hundreds and hundreds of people, who are going to watch me. I look behind me, making sure my sister and my best friend are still there. Farther behind them, I spot Nate, who is watching me. Turning around, I take in as many deep breaths as I can.

“You ready to rock, kiddo?” Troy asks me.

“I think so.” Not really.

Travis has my clipboard going through everything. This was always his job, but I just sort of took over when making sure everything was done right. He never complained about it. It’s weird seeing him doing it, as I feel it should still be me.

“Sam, you ready?” Travis asks him.”

Sam nods, heading to the drums. The lump in my throat gets bigger.

Oh no, oh no, oh no.

“Star?” Travis looks at me, my eyes on him. Okay, don’t panic. “You ready?”

Can I say no? I look back, seeing the sign for the exit. I got this. I nod and he winks at me, pointing to my spot. I start walking onto the stage that is in complete darkness apart from the little glow-in-the-dark marks on the floor.