An Act of Persuasion(65)
“I’ll take care of this,” he said. “Trust me.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
ANNA STARED AT HERSELF in the cheval mirror she kept in her bedroom. Naked, she turned to her side and stood as straight as she could and sucked in her belly as hard as she could.
It was no use. The bump was there and it wasn’t going away. Beyond that, her breasts were getting bigger. They were bursting out of her normal bras to the point where she’d actually bought her first maternity bra. The cup had a snap, too, so it could be used as a breast-feeding bra.
She tried to imagine the idea that, in the near future, she would be thrilled to pieces to have some little creature basically eating her. It didn’t exactly come, but she figured once the kid was out everything would change.
For now she had to deal with the damage the kiddo was doing from the inside. Next on her shopping list were the pants. Definitely the ones with the stretchy waist and the space for a bump.
Yes, it was time for the clothing to start covering her more completely. But for now, looking at herself completely naked, she had to admit she didn’t hate what the bump was doing. It was as though her body suddenly had this new purpose it never had before. She looked ripe and lush and filled with expectation of this big event that was coming.
Not the worst look in the world. Ben didn’t seem to mind it...at least not while she wore clothes.
Anna tried to imagine what Ben would think when he finally saw her naked. Because that was coming eventually.
The electricity between them was only growing and the sexual tension from him—and her—seemed to be keeping both of them in a perpetual state of heat. Heck, she’d almost encouraged him to take her on the desk in his office, with his assistant no more than ten feet away from his office door. Thank goodness he’d had the presence of mind to stop, because she hadn’t. With all of his chasing of her and all of her running from that chasing it had been easy to overlook a basic fact.
She wanted him. She’d always wanted him and now it seemed exacerbated because her body was acting against her better judgment. Hormones plus desire equaled horny.
So, yes, soon he would see her body in all its glory. She definitely wasn’t skinny. Not that she’d been overly skinny before as he’d already mentioned, pointing out the gentle slope of her non-flat belly. But now she really wasn’t skinny. Instead she was fecund. With boobs and hips and a bump.
Since she’d committed to dating him she’d told herself the reason she’d put off having sex with him made all the sense in the world. She was uncertain of her feelings, uncertain of his. She was afraid of why he wanted her and then afraid of what it meant if he did want her as much as he said he did. Could she handle that level of passion from Ben and still protect her heart?
But beyond all that, she had to deal with the reality of him seeing this body. Granted, she wasn’t full-blown, mamma jamba pregnant yet. She couldn’t imagine yet what that would look like, but she was different.
It would be an adjustment.
The last time the sex had been surreal. As if she’d been watching from outside her body while some other woman who looked like her had sex with him. Frankly, she’d been impressed. After that many years of going without, she fell right into a rhythm with him.
She’d remembered that it actually hurt. That first full thrust of him inside her had burned a little. But she’d been so over-the-moon happy that he was finally inside her that the pain seemed trivial.
The next time it happened would be normal couple sex—what almost every couple who dated and liked each other enough to take their relationship to that next step did. She and Ben had gotten the kissing part down pat. He kissed her every time he saw her now. He kissed her when he picked her up for lunch and kissed her when he dropped her off after a date. He kissed her in the car before he started the engine.
Sometimes he would kiss her after he paid the check for their dinner.
It was strange, too, because she didn’t see Ben as a kissing kind of guy. Sure, when he was going to make love to a woman he would engage in earth-shattering, mind-blowing kisses. That seemed totally his style. He wanted to overwhelm the enemy, er, the woman with sex appeal and pleasure.
But kisses for the sake of affection, or a quick peck just because he could, seemed slightly out of character for him. Especially in public.
Maybe it’s because it’s all you’ll let him have.
Anna dismissed the voice in her head. She didn’t need an inner monologue to know she’d kept Ben at arm’s length solely out of fear on her part. But the fear and the panic of what they as a couple might look like was starting to recede. She and Ben had only four more months to work out the details of what that image would be before they became parents. Then it would change again. So they needed to get this right.