All They Need(74)

“And when he gets down on his knee and proposes, how are you going to take that?”

Mel blinked, startled by her sister’s comment. “Wow. You are really pushing the boat out today.”

“That man is crazy about you, Mel.”

Mel shook her head. “We’ve barely started seeing each other. Stop trying to make this more than what it is.”

“It took me an hour to work out that I was going to spend the rest of my life with Jacob. Sixty minutes almost exactly from the moment we met.”

Mel shook her head again. “It’s not like that between us.”

She could hear the strain in her own voice as she tried to convince her sister. The truth was that she didn’t want to think about any of the things her sister was pushing her to consider. She was coping—barely—with being intimate with a man again. Being naked with him, trusting him with her desire and her needs. Both big steps after the way Owen had abused that trust. She wasn’t up to worrying about bigger-picture stuff, like where her relationship with Flynn might be going, what it might mean.

“Okay,” Justine said, nodding. She pushed away from the counter and pulled a white bakery bag from her purse. “You want chocolate chip or blueberry or halvies?”

Mel watched her warily, not convinced her sister would back off so easily. “Halvies sounds good,” she said cautiously.

Justine cut the muffins in half and divided the bounty between two plates. She took a big bite of muffin, then fixed Mel with a contemplative gaze as she chewed and swallowed. “For what it’s worth, I like him. He seems like a decent guy.”

“He’s more then decent. He’s a great guy.”

“But he’s still a rich guy. He’s still got lots of rich friends and rich parents and all that bullshit hanging over him.”

“And?”

Justine shrugged. “Nothing. I just want you to go in with your eyes open this time.”

Mel took a deep breath, reminding herself that Justine had been the one she called the night of the Hollands’ party. She’d seen Mel at her worst, seen the marriage at its ugliest. She had a right to dislike Owen and all he stood for.

So instead of telling her sister to butt out, she crossed the kitchen and gave Justine a big hug.

“I’m doing okay. I think Flynn is good for me, and I’m smarter now.”

Justine’s eyes were swimming with tears when Mel let go.

“I want you to be happy so badly, Mel. He seems like a nice guy, but he’s not like us. He doesn’t know what it’s like to have the heating break down and know you’re going to have to live on baked beans for the next month to pay for the repairs. He’s never had to call the bank to explain why the mortgage repayment will be late. He’s used to the best of everything, to having the world at his feet.”

Mel thought about what Flynn was going through with his parents, the career he’d given up to take over the family business. “His life isn’t perfect, Justine. Far from it. Money doesn’t make everything better, and it doesn’t turn people into dicks. They do that all on their own.” She paused for a beat to give her words a chance to sink in. “Now, can we talk about something else? Anything else?”

Justine sniffed inelegantly and used her sleeve to blot her tears. Then she pushed the plate with Mel’s share of the muffins on it toward Mel.

“Eat something. You’re making me feel like a pig over here.”

Mel dutifully picked up half a muffin, and her sister dutifully recounted a story about Rex and Eddy. The kettle boiled and Mel made them both coffee, and an hour later her sister left, her doubts apparently assuaged.

Mel went into the garden afterward, wishing she could say the same. She’d meant every word she’d said to her sister, but there was still an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach. The garden had always been her sanctuary when she was troubled and she tackled the weeds encroaching on the path with a vengeance, deriving a certain amount of satisfaction from restoring order.

She couldn’t stop Justine’s words from echoing in her head, however. Her sister thought Flynn was crazy about her—besotted had been the word she’d used. She’d even made a crack about him proposing, of all things.

Both notions made Mel feel a little ill. She didn’t want Flynn to be besotted with her. She wanted him to like her and to enjoy spending time with her, and she wanted him to desire her—but she didn’t want any of those wants or likes or desires to become too messy or demanding. The same as she didn’t want her own wants, likes or desires in regard to him to take on a life of their own. She wanted to feel in control, and she wanted a sense of separation between her and him, a clear demarcation line that allowed her to maintain her life and him his while allowing them both to meet somewhere in the middle.