After the Fall(47)
With sudden insight, she knew that for now he needed her to be strong for both of them. And he needed her forgiveness, wanted to hear the words, even if she couldn’t listen to what he’d done, who he’d been with …
Another thought jolted her back to the moment. What is he doing? Could he … ?
Gigi got up and shoved her feet into her boots, grabbed her cloak and went out into the cold, wet night. Constantly wiping her face clear of pelting rain, she searched the common gathering places, then the alleyways between nearby tents. Running wildly, she splashed through puddles, looking everywhere, growing more frantic with each empty turn. Where was he?
Gigi halted at the edge of the camp, gasping for air. She saw his silhouette, black against the mist of rain, looking north over the Bay of Naples toward Capri, a place he loved. He must have heard her approach, for he glanced at her, but made no move in her direction.
“Magnus, why are you out here?” she asked. “Why are you punishing yourself like this? You can’t just say stuff like that and then leave when I get upset. Give me a few moments, at least, before you run off to fall on your sword.”
He looked at her curiously, then crossed his arms and turned back to the sea. “I did not kill myself when I feared you were lost to me forever, Gigi. I hadn’t planned on killing myself now.”
“Damn you, Magnus! Are you feeling sorry for yourself? Don’t tell me — you’re mad because I’m not letting you tell me every crude detail?” She got in his face and forced him to look at her. “Go confess your sins to Victoria if you want absolution on specifics, but don’t expect it from me!”
“I’m not expecting absolution, Gigi. I have hated that you looked at me with such love, love I didn’t deserve.”
“But … ” She took a deep breath, trying to focus her thoughts, because her next words were critical to their future. “You’re not the one who gets to decide whether you deserve my love or not — that’s my prerogative.” Gigi drew the sodden cloak around her and then reached up to touch his face. “I’m sorry your grief drove you so far. But that doesn’t change how I feel about you. Please, Magnus, I forgive you. I love you.”
She fell quiet and he gazed at her, then nodded slightly, his expression relaxing into the barest of smiles.
“As you will,” he said, “but the next time you run after me, all worked up and in a fright, first look to my weapons. Both my blades are still in the tent and plain to see. Besides, I made you a promise never to fall on my sword, and you may rest assured my oath binds me forever.” He took her hand and kissed her ring. “I believe Victoria has guided me from the day you arrived in the baptistery, Gigi. It was my goddess who caused you to have the ring and brought you back in time. It was also Victoria who extricated me from a vile and unworthy emperor, whom I served because of a deathbed promise to his father, a good man who never guessed his young son would grow into a murderer without conscience.”
“Magnus, I can’t pretend to know why I’m here, but if it freed you from Honorius, then I’m glad.”
He took her into his arms. “It was more than that, so much more.” He kissed her, a long, lingering kiss that warmed her to her core. “I know now that my mission in life is to protect you. You are my wife, the only woman I have ever loved, and I will always stay by your side, no matter what happens. Shall we escape to the ends of the Earth, to that unknown continent of yours? Victoria will surely help. I shall make sacrifices to her at dawn. I will seek her guidance for a new start, asking the Fates to smile down upon us now and forever.”
“Whatever happens, I love you, Magnus. I always will.”
She nestled against him, willing herself to happiness, hoping it would turn out like they wanted, and that fate would be kind.
• • •
Honorius held his bird in his lap, cooing into her ear, “Ah, Rome, dearest pet, the city for which you were named has been destroyed. We must ask our astrologers what it portends, for you are precious to us.” Hollow-eyed, he looked up at Sarus. “General, we would ask that you fetch our conjurers on your way out of our chambers.”
Sarus stood there, feeling the crushing weight of contempt for Honorius, for much still needed to be discussed, including what should be done about King Alaric.
“Rome sacked!” Honorius started sniffling. “We would blame Olympius for this, but he is dead … dead. Oh, who is to blame? Who failed us?”