After Anna(54)

‘We didn’t have a rule that you can’t buy a car, and anyway, that’s not what you’re upset about.’ Maggie could see that his eyes were bloodshot, and he must’ve been upset after the hospital. ‘I heard you went to meet Dina and Steve. How are they?’

‘This isn’t about them, either. This is about Anna and how we live our lives.’ Noah motioned to the driveway again. ‘And that is not how we live our lives. We don’t blow money like that.’

‘It’s her money –’

‘The point is she has to ask us if she can buy something that big. She lives under our roof and she has to learn our values. That’s what parents do. They teach their children values.’

‘She’s never been part of a family before. She’s learning –’

‘She’s running the place. She even took my parking space. I can’t even park in my own driveway.’

‘Noah, we talked about it, and it won’t happen again.’

‘You’re damn right it won’t. That car’s going right back to the dealer.’

‘No, all sales are final, and I told her she could keep it.’ Maggie was trying to reason with him, despite the resentment building in her chest. ‘We can teach her our value system, no matter what she drives. She made a mistake, and that’s part of the learning process.’

‘Oh really? There’s a learning process? When did it start? Because the good ship “begin at the beginning” already sailed.’

‘I’m sorry, I let it get away from me.’

‘You sure did, honey.’

‘Stop it. Don’t be so snide.’ Maggie didn’t like the way he was looking at her, with contempt. ‘And really, is it the end of the world? Did she lie, cheat, or steal? No, she bought herself a car because she’s used to being on her own. She’s not used to asking anybody for permission because nobody’s ever been there to ask, most of all me. And it’s not why you’re upset anyway.’

‘Will you please stop telling me how I’m feeling!’ Noah scowled. ‘I’m feeling the way anybody would feel, any father, any man who came into his house and saw that it was completely out of control.’

‘It’s in control. Maybe not your control, but my control.’

‘Oh please. She’s got you wrapped around her little finger. You’re overcompensating out the wazoo. What’s she buying next, a house?’

‘Basta!’ Maggie stalked out of the dining room. ‘Clean up the glass you broke, before Ralph steps on it.’

‘Fine!’ Noah shouted after her, and Maggie stormed up the stairs, fighting tears. She reached the second floor, went to Anna’s door, and knocked quietly.

‘Honey?’ Maggie called softly.





Chapter Thirty-five


Noah, After

TRIAL, DAY 5

Noah sat on the witness stand during another conference with the judge at the dais. This time the courtroom clerk had misnumbered some exhibits, and Thomas, Linda, and Judge Gardner were fixing them, leaving Noah waiting awkwardly, his hands linked in his lap. He didn’t know what to do with himself, like someone eating alone in a restaurant, except that at the end of the meal he could go to prison for the rest of his life.

Noah couldn’t stop thinking about the fight over the Range Rover, which now marked him as Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. After Maggie had gone upstairs, he’d cleaned up the broken glass, gotten a beer, and looked outside the kitchen window. Caleb had been playing with Ralph in the backyard, and Noah had heard him talking to the cat. When Caleb had been younger, he had practiced counting in front of Ralph, who didn’t seem to mind that Caleb had apraxia and his 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 sounded like pa, poo, pee, bah, pi.

Noah had thought about how much he loved his son and what it would do to him if he lost Caleb, the way Dina and Steve had lost Mike. Even the way that Maggie had lost Anna, gone from her life, only an infant. He felt a wave of guilt that he had treated them all so badly.

Noah had gone out the back door and crossed the lawn to Caleb, with his beer in his hand. Hey buddy.

Hey Dad, Caleb had answered, and Noah walked around to the front of Caleb so they could see each other.

I’m sorry I yelled, buddy.

It’s okay, Caleb had said, but it had come out like zoky, unintelligible to anyone else, which meant he was stressed, not taking the time to formulate a motor plan and form his words more clearly.

Want to go inside? It’s getting dark.

That’s okay, Caleb had said, but it sounded like thzoky.

What if we skip dinner and have ice cream? I think there’s mint chocolate chip in the freezer.

No.

Mind if I keep you company?

No.

Good. Noah had taken another sip of beer, then sat down on the grass, cross-legged. Ralph had come over, sniffing the sweating beer bottle, and Noah stroked the cat’s back. Ralph’s tail curled into a question mark.

He doesn’t like that. Pet under his chin.

Okay. Noah scratched Ralph under his chin, and the cat squinched up his face, wrinkling his nose.

He drooled and purred, Caleb had said, but it was barely intelligible. The letter R was difficult for kids with apraxia and other speech disorders. Noah remembered they were behind on their target words this week and at this rate, they’d never get to accident, badges, antiseptic, or emergency.