A Shield of Glass (A Shade of Vampire #49)(31)

“I’m sorry, Jovi,” Aida said with a trembling voice. “I didn’t want to tell you, to be honest. You keep dying in these visions, and I think you’ve heard enough of it already…”

“It’s okay, Sis,” I quipped, pushing my own despair as deep inside as I could, for the time being. “It’s just a possible future, like Serena said. We can change it.”

“Most possible future,” Jax interjected again.

“Seriously?!” Serena hissed.

“Just being accurate,” the Lord of Maras replied with a shrug. “We can’t just brush these visions aside, nor diminish their chances of coming true. I understand where you’re coming from, but we will gain nothing if we tiptoe around one another’s feelings. This is war, Serena. We have no time for fear and doubt. We have the data, and we know what to do with it. Period.”

Jax had a point. We’d been going through this for quite some time now. The prospect of death. Of losing our loved ones. It hurt every time, but it only had one purpose—to get us to stop it from happening.

It was better to focus on the solution rather than let the problem eat away at us. We’d heard it all before at GASP, but experiencing it ourselves was something else entirely. Nevertheless, I was ready.

“He’s right, Serena,” I added. “It’s okay. We know what’s most likely to happen, and yes, we need to have it bright and red and painfully in our faces, so we understand the gravity of our situation, should we fail going forward.”

I glanced at the Druid, who continued to stare out the window, one elbow resting on his elevated knee. He nodded slowly, taking deep breaths as he listened to our conversation. Hansa found it difficult to see incubi and succubi coming together, after so many centuries apart and in a general state of animosity.

“Things would have to be truly dire for us to reach such a consensus,” she muttered, looking at Anjani, who kept quiet and stared at the floor.

I stood, eager to walk away from it all for a few moments. My brain was close to frying itself, and my stomach turned and twisted at the thought of losing my life and never seeing Anjani again. I needed a break.

“I’m going to hit the shower,” I said with a half-smile that took what was left of my energy to put on my face.

“Our waifs are outside. They will escort you to your room,” Rebel replied from the side, a massive registry book resting in her lap.

“Are you okay?” Aida asked, visibly worried.

“You heard Jax.” I held my stance. “Less problem, more solution. Right now, my only solution is a shower.”

I winked and walked out, immediately greeted by a teenage Bajang in feline form. The creature purred as it rubbed itself against my leg, nearly knocking me down. It was already the size of a lion, even at such a young age.

It stopped in front of a door, looking at me with big yellow eyes.

“Thanks, kitty,” I said slowly. “Thought you guys weren’t fans of us wolf-people.”

The feline shifted in front of me, turning into a beautiful young girl with beige fur and rich, sand-colored hair, like a mane. She gave me a shy smile and bowed respectfully.

“Most of us don’t, but I think you’re sweet,” she said. “And funny.”

“And you’ve just made my day. Thank you!” I couldn’t help but chuckle.

She bowed again then walked away. I entered my room and leaned against the door for a second. When I closed my eyes, the image of Anjani formed in the darkness, her emerald-gold gaze drilling into my very soul.

My heart ached. My bones felt heavier than usual. My breathing was labored.

I turned on the water faucet, delighted to see they had installed water pipes and basic plumbing systems in Stonewall. I stepped into the large copper tub and let the cold stream wash over me, chilling my every nerve ending until I felt nothing.

I cleaned myself up and wrapped a towel tight around my waist before I walked into my room.

My feet froze in the doorway at the sight of Anjani sitting on the edge of my bed. There was a lot of pain in her eyes as she looked at me, her lower lip trembling and her shoulders hunched. Knots began pulling inside me, tugging at invisible strings in my heart.

I didn’t even know what to say to her. I’d hoped my solution-not-problem bravado would fix how I felt, but all it took was one look at Anjani to feel myself come undone.

“I’m having a hard time dealing with Vita’s vision,” she said after we’d stared at each other for a while. “I shouldn’t, because I’m a succubus and I shouldn’t care, but here I am. Weak. Unraveled. Unwilling to face such a future.”

“Anjani…”

Her name was all I could manage.

“I can’t… I wouldn’t marry Bijarki. I… Honestly, it’s unfathomable,” she continued, her voice raw and husky. “Jovi… I would never. I don’t want to. It won’t happen. I will not allow that to happen. You will live, and you will be mine, do you understand me?”

I nodded like a mindless simpleton, while my body succumbed to the incandescent sweetness of all the emotions she stirred in me.

She stood, her chin high, and bit her lower lip.

It sent my senses into a frenzy, but I held onto consciousness for dear life, as she wasn’t done talking and I wasn’t done listening.