A Rip of Realms (A Shade of Vampire #39)(20)

“Tejus,” I snapped. “Tejus and Queen Trina and this entire situation. I think it warrants some chair-kicking.”

I was beyond furious. Ruby had said that Tejus was overpowered by the Acolytes, but even so, the warning of Memenion rang in my ears. Had Tejus been lenient on her, let her escape because when it came down to it, he wasn’t able to kill her? I couldn’t afford for Tejus to have that kind of weakness—what I had in mind for him wouldn’t be possible if he couldn’t protect us all, put Nevertide before his own feelings.

“I don’t think he could have done much to stop it, Ash. Keeping Queen Trina hostage was a mistake. She was always going to get out eventually, surely you could see that?”

Great.

As if I didn’t have enough worries, it now felt like Ruby was questioning my ability to make sound decisions.

“We needed the information,” I said.

“I know.” She sighed. “But we still need to read the book—we just need to find a way for you to become emperor. Maybe then we’ll get some real answers.”

She was right about that. I didn’t want to delay the trip to seek out the Impartial Ministers a moment longer. At dawn tomorrow we’d leave to find them—I just hoped that Tejus had some idea as to where they might be. The ministers had kept their abode secret for centuries, and I didn’t know of any non-minister who had ever visited them.

“All right. We’ll leave tomorrow. In the meantime, I’ve asked the guards to take turns in keeping watch, and I’ve put barriers up around the palace. It will have to be enough for now—hopefully Queen Trina will be busy recuperating and not planning a return.”

Ruby nodded.

“You should get some rest,” she replied.

“I know.”

I was so short-tempered that even Ruby was irritating me. I let out another breath, looking around the empty ballroom. The meeting with the guards hadn’t gone particularly well—if it hadn’t been for Ragnhild, I doubted that a single one of them would have listened to what I had to say. It didn’t exactly make me feel spectacular.

“So, where do we sleep?” I asked tetchily.

“Jenney and the kids are sleeping together in one of the upstairs rooms. We could join them, there are enough beds up there.”

“Fine, let’s do that.”

We left the ballroom and walked up the main staircase. I felt like I hardly had the energy to reach the top—every single part of my body felt like it wanted to give up, to just slump on the marble floor and let someone else take over for a while.

When we reached the kids’ room, I could hear laughter coming from inside—the sound of the kids squealing, and Benedict arguing with Yelena.

I stopped at the door, holding it shut when Ruby tried to open it.

“I can’t,” I replied. “I need to be somewhere quiet. I’ll see you later.” I started walking off when Ruby grabbed my arm.

“Ash, wait. What’s wrong? I mean aside from Queen Trina escaping. Something else is bugging you. What is it?”

“I’m just in a bad mood, that’s all,” I replied, removing my arm from her grasp.

“Don’t be like this,” she said. “Just tell me what’s wrong—I can’t help otherwise.”

“You can’t help me anyway!” I exclaimed. “I feel completely useless—I have no idea what to do, everything feels like it’s totally and utterly out of my control, the guards have absolutely no faith in me, and right now it feels like you don’t either!”

She looked stung, her eyes widening with shock at my revelation.

“That’s totally not true!”

“Shortie, come on—what about Queen Trina? Apparently, you knew she would escape, and I thought we had her secured till we could get some answers!”

“I didn’t mean that the way it sounded,” she replied sullenly. “I believe you can do this. You know I do—I always have.”

I stayed silent, not knowing what else to say. I was handling this all wrong, and I knew it. Yet again, Ruby and I were arguing when I didn’t want us to be, creating more distance between us, which, considering we couldn’t get intimate, was an idiotic thing to do.

“Come on,” Ruby announced, dragging me along the corridor by my robe.

“Where are we going?”

“Somewhere quiet. That’s what you wanted, right?”

I followed her in silence, wondering where in Nevertide she was taking me. At the end of the corridor she pushed open one of the doors, revealing a small box-shaped room that was completely empty apart from a small window, a dilapidated-looking chair and a wood burner.

“Wait here,” she instructed, storming back out again.

I leaned against the wall, not really seeing any other option.

She came back a moment later, carrying a blanket and two pillows, all strongly smelling of damp.

“This is all I could find. It will have to do.”

I nodded, watching as she laid the blanket on the floor and arranged the pillows at one end. Then she turned toward the wood burner, tapping her foot in agitation as she looked around for some wood.

I walked toward the chair and started to break it up best I could.

“I feel bad,” Ruby said, watching me destroy the furniture.