A Lady Under Siege(72)

“Blame the husband, then. I don’t think we should blame Thomas for any of this,” Derek said.

“I’m not blaming him, but I do need to talk to him.”

“Fine. But keep in mind that he’s a man of his time—and a man of his time would find it ludicrous to think he needs a woman’s consent to have sex with her.”

“Can you just let me speak?”

Derek made an exaggerated gesture of zipping his mouth shut. Meghan gathered her thoughts.

“Thomas,” she began. “I beg you to leave Sylvanne alone. Promise me you won’t force yourself on her, ever again. Can you do that, please?”

Derek couldn’t help himself. “Maybe he liked it that she bit him. Maybe he thought, ‘What a hellcat! A tigress!’”

“Stop it. A hellcat is a caged animal, frightened and cornered. That’s why she fought—because there was no escape, nowhere to hide.”

“Ask him if I’m right. Thomas, am I right?”

“It’s impossible to talk to you,” she sighed.

“No, just the opposite. It’s easier than ever. Haven’t you noticed? I’ve gotten on board. I’m taking it seriously. I’m treating Thomas as real. You’re driving, I’m riding shotgun. There’s no map. So the best I can do is throw some ideas out there. For example let me say this: Way to go Thomas, thanks for f*cking up and falling off your pedestal, from saint to sinner in fair Meghan’s eyes. I like you better this way, a bit rough around the edges.”

“You’re making fun of me.”

“No I’m not,” Derek insisted. “I’m teasing him, not you—the guy obviously has massive feelings for you, and was trying to show it, the only way he knew how.”

“Massive feelings—your words.” Her mind was a jumble of high emotions, none of which she wanted to share with Derek. “May I say one last thing to Thomas?”

“Of course.”

Meghan composed herself, then began to speak, slowly and forcefully. “Thank you for trying to reach me. Remember, when I’m inside Sylvanne, I’m privy to her thoughts, and a prisoner of her feelings. She was alone with her thoughts all night after you left. She’s a very proud woman. There were moments when she hated herself for failing, for falling short in her duty. She could have finished you off with a single stroke of the blade, fast and deep. Why didn’t she? Without that duty fulfilled, what is she? Oftentimes I feel there’s so much guilt bottled up in her—guilt that she failed in her primary duty to her husband, to give him children, and failed even to truly love him as a wife should. Now that he’s dead it’s like she still wants to make it up to him, and wants to finally fulfill her duty to him—it’s come down to one mighty act of revenge, and yet she still can’t do it, she doesn’t want to do it, she wishes someone would talk her out of it. She’s lost. She wants to be rescued.”

“Is that how she feels, or is that you?” Derek asked.

“I’m speaking for her. I’m trying to make sense of feelings she can’t articulate.”

Derek thought a moment before he spoke. “You know what’s funny about this?”

“Nothing.”

“Hear me out. Thomas is in my head, right? That means I can talk to him anytime I like, just by thinking. Whereas if you have anything to say to him you have to come over and visit me. So in a way I’m in the driver’s seat, not you. He talks to you, but he listens to me.”

Meghan looked at him coldly. “I’m still not sure if you’re just fooling with me, or what you’re up to.”

“Well you’re going to have to trust me to do the right thing,” Derek said. “While you’re here, I’m going to share my advice for our man Thomas. So Thomas, listen up, bud. There’s a clear path you need to follow here: you need to woo this Lady Sylvanne! You owe it to her. You killed her husband. Sorry, but you did. And now she’s all alone in the world, thanks to you. And yet she has some feelings for you. Give the woman a lifeline! Take care of her! You need to win her heart, like a chivalrous knight of old. And luckily for you, you just happen to be one, right?” To Meghan he said, “You’d like it if he did that, wouldn’t you?”

“Of course I would.”

“And if they get together, you’ll still get your wish, of getting with Thomas.”

“Now you’re making it sound too devious,” Meghan objected. “I’m asking him to be kind to her, simply because she deserves it. I don’t want any ulterior motive attached to it. It’s for her, not me.”