Winter World (The Long Winter #1)(46)

Something’s going on. I know Harry, Min, and Grigory have been meeting in private. I suspect it’s about me—they change the subject every time I get near them. And they’re not the only ones meeting in private. I’ve spotted Izumi and James whispering in the med bay. And I know that’s about me. Specifically, my bone density. It’s bad. My gums are receding and my grip strength is waning. My fingernails are brittle too, and I’m getting cramps more often, especially at night. I feel as if I’m aging at an advanced rate, like someone in a time warp, literally disintegrating. But the fact remains: besides exercise and mineral supplements, there’s nothing anyone can do.

And this is a far better fate than dying back on the ISS or in that rescue capsule. I’ve had a chance to be part of something—an incredible mission with some of the best minds and the best people whom I’ve ever known.

None of us will stop fighting for this mission.





Madre dispatched one of the scout drones from the Janus fleet back to the Pax to report. The mother drone found the fleet, powered them up, and has them en route to Beta. They’ll arrive in two weeks. I’m counting down the days.

Because Beta is behind us and moving fast, we’ll reach it long before we would have reached Alpha. That’s the good news. The bad news is that Beta could be going so fast it zooms right past us before we can intercept.

The clock is ticking. We’ll know soon.





Harry, James, and I are working in the lab when Grigory drifts into the hatchway.

“Bubble meeting.”

His expression is blank. I sense bad news.

In the bubble, when everyone is present and tethered to the conference table, Min says, “The comm drone is back from the Fornax.”

The fact that the Fornax is out there is a relief. From Min’s expression, I’m guessing that’s the extent of the good news.

“I’m going to read their return message verbatim,” Min says, staring at a tablet. He clears his throat. “Be advised, Fornax compromised. Six capsules never reached assembly point.” Min holds the tablet up. “There’s a list. Grigory and I already looked it up. One was Harry’s capsule, of course, and four were supply capsules. The sixth was Oliver Karnes. The other aeronautics engineer.”

Grigory’s counterpart on the Fornax. That’s bad.

There’s a long silence. As someone who never met the original crew and has gone through losing people in space, I’m probably able to process this a bit faster. I try to make my voice neutral. “I expect that explains why Harry’s capsule was sent to the Pax rendezvous point. Once Karnes’s capsule was lost, meaning there would be no aeronautics engineer on the Fornax, mission control must have felt that Harry’s skills would be underutilized there.”

“That’s an understatement,” Harry says. “We’d be lost without Grigory.”

The Russian shrugs. “The truth finally emerges.”

There’s controlled laughter around the room. It’s a weak attempt to conceal the disappointment we all feel. And responsibility. The mission truly falls to us now.

“The message continues,” Min says. “The crew of the Fornax favors transferring our drone stock to the Pax. Be advised: our delta payload is intact.”

“Delta payload?” I ask.

James leans over and responds. “The only thing that was different on the two ships’ supply manifests: they had a nuke, we got more drone parts.”

“And one crewmember was different,” Charlotte says. “Me and Dan Hampstead.”

“True,” James says.

“Final line of message,” Min announces. “We are altering course and preparing for rendezvous and docking. We await further orders from Pax.” Min looks up. “End message.”

After a pause, he says, “let’s talk about our options.”

“I need a minute,” James says. “I need to think about this. We all do before we make this decision.”





In the lab, James pulls me aside.

“You’re getting sicker.”

“I know.”

“But you don’t know how bad it is.”

“I do know, James.”

“We—Izumi and I—can’t treat you here. You’ve got to get to a real hospital and to stronger gravity soon.”

“That ship has sailed. We both know it.”

“Not necessarily. We’re on a rocket ship. And we’re about to have another. One with no real purpose other than to release a nuke and then fly back to Earth, double fast.”

“No.”

“No what?”

“No, I’m not going. You’re not putting me on the Fornax and sending me home. I’m staying here and working. You know we need the Fornax in the hunt for the artifact. If for no other reason than to observe and relay findings to Earth in case the Pax is compromised. You can’t waste that ship on hospital transport back to Earth. We’re all expendable.”

“We’re not.”

“We are. End of discussion.”

“Do you have any idea what your deterioration and death would do to this crew?”

“This crew is strong enough to take it.”

“Don’t be so sure.”