Wild for You (Hot Jocks #6)(25)

We hang up, and I let my phone drop onto the bed.

Hobbes snaps awake with a jolt, surprised by the movement. I apologize to him with a soft kiss on his wet little nose, and he soon curls back into a fluffy mound against my side.

The bed is warm, embracing me in a cocoon of cotton and silk. I’m thankful to have this little companion in my bed, even if he does have paws. And the assurance that Grant is only a phone call away gives me comfort too. He’s an interesting man, and the more I learn about him, the more I want to know.

I’ve always assumed strength is loud. That the loudest voice in the room belongs to the strongest person. But with Grant, I’m learning strength can be silent too. Because his quiet and thoughtful approach is the most dignified thing I’ve ever seen.

That quiet strength communicates so much more than words ever could. His expressive gray eyes say that he’ll catch me when I fall, that I’m really welcome here, despite my anxiety that tells me otherwise. That he doesn’t blame me for finding myself in such a disastrous relationship. With everything I’ve been through lately, it means a lot to know that someone believes in me.

It’s with those comforting thoughts that I slip into a peaceful slumber.





8




* * *





Coupling Up





Grant



“And then she made me promise I wouldn’t tell anyone,” Asher says with a chuckle.

Well, it’s safe to say the cat’s out of the bag on that one. The topic of tonight’s conversation? The time one of the rookies, Landon, witnessed Asher’s fiancée giving him a blow job.

God, I swear my teammates are idiots.

We’re at the bar now, and even though we can’t partake in anything stronger than soda and lemonade the night before a game, we’ll be damned if we go to bed before curfew.

But their weird sex stories are actually an improvement over the dinner conversations I was forced to endure. At the team dinner tonight, there was a whole lot of wedding talk. My teammate Teddy and his former fiancée and now brand-new wife, Sara, just eloped. And another teammate of mine, Justin, is planning a wedding to his long-time girlfriend, Elise. Owen’s married now, and Asher is engaged. Only the couple of rookies are still single—well, and me, of course.

I always feel so alone during these discussions with nothing to contribute to the conversation besides some well-timed nodding.

But tonight something feels different, because all I can think about is the fact that I do have a woman living in my apartment right now, however temporary that might be. Still, I like the thought that I have someone to come home to after this trip. I wonder if my place will smell like her, or maybe like buttery French toast again. I find myself smiling at the idea of that.

I always figured I’d be married by now, maybe even have a couple of kids filling the bedrooms of a big house in the suburbs. A big backyard with touch football games, and barbecues, and lemonade. It’s what I pictured when I was younger, what I hoped for. But at thirty-two, I’m still single and living alone in a condo. My teammates are my family, and while most of them are years younger than me, they’re all starting to find someone special and get married. It’s something I try not to dwell on often.

My phone conversation with Ana earlier still swirls in my head, making it difficult to focus on the conversation around me.

I know she thinks she’s in the way, but the truth is, I like knowing she’s there. Like just having another human in my place. I love how she’s made herself at home in my kitchen, love the way her nose scrunches up when her dog does something naughty. I like the sound of her laugh, and the way she hums to herself when she cooks. She’s so domestic and nurturing, even with that damn dog. I know she’ll make a great wife someday to a lucky man. It’s a hard idea to swallow, because I also know that man won’t be me.

God, the image of her standing naked at the bathtub is one I won’t soon forget. Pale curves and full breasts . . . my hands itched to touch her. I wouldn’t, of course. Couldn’t.

“What do you think, Grant?” Jordie asks, pulling my attention back to the conversation.

“About what?”

He sighs, shaking his head. “About what will happen to Kress once his suspension is up?”

That’s a great question, and one I have no answer to. In the meantime, there’s one thing I know for sure.

I’ll do my damnedest to keep Ana safe.





9




* * *





Giving In





Ana



The following night, I find myself in Grant’s bed. His sheets smell just like him—clean and earthy, reminding me of the night air right after a brutal storm. Unfortunately, the storm outside still rages, with no promise of letting up anytime soon.

Memories of that fateful night flash with every bolt of lightning, totally wreaking havoc on any sense of calm I’ve achieved. I’m too old to be afraid of the dark, but that doesn’t change the fact that I am. I see death and destruction lurking in its shadows, and panicked feelings claw up my throat, tightening it like a noose. I should have outgrown this anxiety by now, and I’m ashamed that I haven’t.

In the echo of each crack, I can still hear the phone ringing, the one next to the fridge in my family’s kitchen. Then I hear the hurried shuffle of my dad’s slippers from his post at the living room window to the phone. It was his crying that pulled me out of bed, and I tiptoed on cold toes to the kitchen.