Whisper Me This(89)

“Does he discipline you, too?”

Her breathing hesitates, comes back ragged and irregular. “I need to go, Maisey. It’s time to feed the baby.”

Which tells me all I need to know. Linda can’t help me, can’t protect Elle. She’s scared. I take a breath and soften my tone, coaxing her like a frightened animal.

“Wait a minute, Linda. He’s not there. He’ll never know we had this conversation. I won’t have Elle being hit. He’ll fight me in court, I know how he is. I need your help.”

She laughs at that. Shaky and small, but defiant. “I’ve already told you he has a right—”

“You hold that thought. Now picture your son growing up. What’s it going to be for him? A cheek slap and humiliation? Or fists? You think he’s immune, because he’s a boy. Hell, maybe you’re right. But do you want him to learn that behavior? Do you really think it’s okay?”

“I am not having this conversation. Greg is my husband. He—”

“Spare me. Do this one thing. Tell him you don’t want Elle full time. You know it’s the right thing to do.”

“I’m sorry, Maisey. I can’t.”

The line goes dead, but her voice lingers in my ears, soft with what sounds like regret. Wild thoughts surge through my brain. I’ll run away with my daughter. Wipe out our identities. Live in the car.

None of this is practical, and I know it. I don’t have money to bankroll a getaway of that magnitude. Sooner or later I’m going to have to let Elle go back to Greg. Even if I put Dad in a care facility and go back to Kansas City, I’ll still have to let her visit. Living in a car and being on the run would probably be more damaging than the occasional discipline from her father.

I’m in the throes of accepting reality when the slider opens and Tony comes out on the deck.

“What’s the plan?” he asks. “We’re game to drive tonight, if you want, only your dad looks totally done in.”

I scrub my face with my hands and groan. “I know. Me, too. Just not up to fighting with Greg tonight.”

“You’re forgetting you have a bodyguard,” he says. “Or, you could sleep here.”

“Dad needs his medication. And we couldn’t intrude. I’m being ridiculous, I know. I need to face up to him. It’s just that I’m so damn tired.”

Tony’s hand rests on my shoulder. His face softens. His head lowers toward mine, and for a minute I think he’s going to kiss me again. “Mia and I will go fetch the meds. I bet Elle would love to sleep in the treehouse. Maybe you, too.”

I lean into this version of a plan like an illicit lover’s embrace. It is warm, inviting—and wrong.

“Another time.” I straighten my shoulders. “I’m not going to keep hiding from Greg. We’ll go back to the house tonight. I’ll tell Greg that Elle isn’t going, like I’m an adult and not a frightened child. And tomorrow we’ll head for the Tri-Cities if you guys are still up for that.”

“Absolutely.” He opens the slider for me, then pauses, hand on the door. “You can do this, Maisey. You’re stronger than you think.”

Marley was the strong one, I almost tell him, and then gasp as the realization hits me. All of Marley’s imagined qualities: her fearlessness, her way with words, her adventurous spirit. All of them are mine. I don’t remember her, not as a real child. I created her out of the fabric of my own being.

Tony’s right. I can do this.

For a minute I consider leaving Elle here, safe and out of reach. And then it occurs to me that she needs to know that I will stand up for her. She needs to know that a woman can be strong against a man.

I’m not sure that I know this for myself, but I have one inner certainty. I cannot spend the rest of my life hiding from Greg.

Still, as we pull into Dad’s street, I’m holding my breath with the hope that Greg’s car will be gone. That he’s moved on. It would be fantastic luck to have the inner credit of knowing I was ready to stand up to him without actually having to do so.

Luck is against me. Greg is against me.

Earlier, he was irritated. He is now thoroughly pissed. Rage radiates off him like heat from an inferno. He gets out of his car, sears me with a glare, and then speaks directly to Elle.

“Get in the car. Your mother will bring your things.”

Elle hesitates, caught in the crossfire. I press the house key into her hand. “Go in the house, Elle. Take Grandpa and lock the door behind you.”

She scuttles up the sidewalk and away.

When Dad doesn’t follow, she turns back to look at us, at him, wavering.

“Please,” I say to the only father I’ve ever known. “She doesn’t need to hear this.”

He nods and follows Elle up the sidewalk and into the house.

Drawing strength from the fiercely protective love I have for my father and my daughter, I turn to face the man who has been controlling my life, one way or another, for so many years.

“We are not selling the house, Greg. I already told you. So I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t try to hook me up with Realtors.”

“And I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t undermine my authority with Elle. I’ve bought her a ticket. Spent money. And we need to go. It’s already late, and we have an early flight.”