When Everything Is Blue(33)

“So messed up, man. You really get off on scaring me.”

He smiles. “You’re not that easy to scare, though. That time you ate shit at Tropical Smoothie and got knocked out. That shit was scary.”

I bombed on a trick and fell wrong, knocked my head against a curb, and went unconscious for a spell. “And you forced me to wear a helmet for, like, weeks after, even though it made me look like a total dweeb.”

“You were concussed, Theo. I didn’t want you to have any more brain damage than you already did.”

“So lame,” I say.

“Yeah, well, someone has to keep an eye on your clumsy ass.” He’s quiet, and my mind wanders to some of our shenanigans over the years. All the stunts we were able to pull off because we had each other, like the time we got the neighborhood kids to meet us at this big concrete drain at the edge of our subdivision. It has a slope of, like, forty-five degrees. We “borrowed” a couple of shopping carts from Publix and tried skating them down the drain, judging one another based on distance, speed, and style. One of our many dumb ways to die.

“That day in Sebastian, though,” Chris says, “I thought you had drowned, T.”

“Getting soft, old man.”

“You were under for so long.”

“You were hoping to give me mouth-to-mouth, huh?” I say, and the words are out there, hanging between us, and I can’t take them back.

A beat later he laughs, but it sounds more like he’s choking. “I would have done it, you know, if it needed to be done.”

I shake my head. “Lucky for you it didn’t.”

“Lucky me.” He smiles and glances away, then pulls the sheet up over our heads like we used to when we’d be watching something we shouldn’t on his laptop, aka porn, and sharing a set of earbuds between us.

“Wouldn’t it be great if we could stay in here forever?” he asks.

“Yeah.” I sigh, afraid to say anything more and ruin the moment.

We stare at each other until the oxygen runs out. Warmth radiates from my chest thinking about all the shared memories between us, and the contentment in knowing that at least one person in this world gets me, really gets me.

I don’t know why, but I kind of start to sniffle. Chris pulls back the sheet to see me better. “Theo?” he says and shoves me a little, like I might be faking. When he realizes I’m not, he mutters roughly, “Come here,” and grabs me with his two powerful arms, manhandles me so my back is against his chest. He wraps his arms around me, like a brother might or maybe even a lover. At the moment I don’t really care, I just want to be held by him.

Chris rests his chin on my shoulder and breathes into my neck. I wish I could capture his noises in a bottle and keep them forever. Lift the lid a little when I’m lonely and let his sighs and moans roll over me like the waves on the sand.





Uncle Theo


WE WAKE up late the next morning because Chris forgot to set an alarm. It’s kind of hectic getting ready for school. I end up throwing on some of his clothes and dash next door to get my backpack and deck, then meet him out front where he’s waiting with the engine already running. We arrive at school during the end of first period and hang out in the parking lot until the bell rings so we don’t have to go to the ISS room.

Chris heads straight to physics since he already has his stuff, and I head to our lockers. Dave’s there when I arrive. I say what’s up to him and the rest of the crew and start unloading my stuff. Dave waits until it’s mostly cleared out, then says to me, “I went by your house last night.”

That’s a first. I guess he did text me a few times. I was too preoccupied to respond. “I was out to dinner with my dad,” I tell him.

“Your sister said you were staying the night at Chris’s.”

I shrug. Why is Dave all up in my business?

“She said you were an asshole at dinner and you had Chris come pick you up.”

Jesus, my sister has a mouth. “Did she invite you in for tea and biscuits too?”

He scowls at me. “Don’t be a smartass. You could have called me, you know?”

I run my fingers down the spine of one of my textbooks. It never even occurred to me to call Dave. For some reason, our relationship doesn’t seem to exist for me outside his apartment.

“Why didn’t you?” he asks.

“I don’t know.”

“Did you think of it?”

“No,” I say honestly.

He crosses his arms. I can tell he’s hurt by it, but I don’t want to lie. One of the reasons we work is because we’re both pretty up-front about things.

“You coming over this afternoon?” he asks.

I know he wants to mess around, but I’m more confused about Chris than ever. I’m not exactly sure how Dave fits in with all this, and I don’t want to be selfish or lead him on. I definitely don’t want him as a boyfriend, and it seems the only way to avoid that is to cool things off for a bit.

“My sister wants me to help make food for this party she’s having this weekend,” I tell Dave, which is the truth.

“Yeah, I heard about that.”

I realize I didn’t invite him, and yet I don’t want him there either, because Chris will be there, and I know it will be awkward.