What She Found (Tracy Crosswhite #9)(88)

Tracy couldn’t imagine what that must have been like for a young detective new to the job in a new city. Del and Faz had each told Tracy they’d had other professional choices, but detective had been their passions. They each had been driven by a sense of justice, of right and wrong, and a desire to do good. She knew that over the years Del must have conjured up a number of different scenarios on how he would get even with Moss, none of which had ever come to fruition.

This might have been his last, best chance, and he knew it.

“I really screwed this up when I didn’t come forward all those years ago, didn’t I?” He turned from the windshield and glanced at Tracy. Yeah, he’d screwed up, but none of them was perfect. The fact that Del cared showed he was still one of the good guys.

“What happened was not your fault, Del. Don’t start taking the blame for what those people did. You had less evidence than we have now. You could have ended up fired or in a grave.”

“Maybe. But maybe if I told someone in a position of authority what I had learned about the raid, that Moss hadn’t reported it, maybe Slocum would still be alive and Childress wouldn’t be in the situation she’s in. Maybe we’d have some leverage.”

“And maybe ‘if ifs and buts were candy and nuts, we’d all have a merry Christmas,’” Tracy said.

Del looked at her and allowed himself a faint smile. He’d told Tracy that numerous times over the years.

“Faz once told me I have to learn to accept the things I can’t change,” Tracy said.

“Leave it to Faz to pass off the serenity prayer as his own,” Del said with a sad smile. “That guy is one in a million.” Del checked his wristwatch. “Best I get going. Celia will be waiting, and you got a little girl to get home and hug.”

“I’m sorry, Del.”

“What are you sorry about?”

“I know you’ve been carrying a heavy burden. I would have liked to have lifted it from your shoulders.”

“Don’t do that to me, okay? I’m a big boy and I got big shoulders. I’m responsible for the weight I’m bearing. But I don’t think I could carry that weight if I thought I let you down too. I’ll see you in the—no, I guess I won’t see you; will I?”

“Not at the police department. Not for a while,” Tracy said.

“Anything comes up, you let me and Faz know, right?”

“Absolutely,” Tracy said.

She drove home. Silence greeted her. Most of the lights had been turned off. She softly placed her keys in the glass bowl so as not to set off the dog alarm, then saw Rex and Sherlock outside the window in the backyard. That meant Dan locked them out so they wouldn’t wake Daniella, which likely meant their daughter had been fussy but was not asleep.

Tracy went outside and greeted Rex and Sherlock, then led them quietly upstairs. She pointed to the two large dog beds.

“Basket,” she whispered, and they dutifully went to their beds, twirled in circles, and lay down. Dan was not in their bedroom. Tracy went down the hall to Daniella’s bedroom. The night-light illuminated the yellow walls and the wallpaper trim she and Dan had installed along the ceiling. Carousel horses pranced up and down, little boys and girls laughing on the horses’ backs. Dan rocked in the rocking chair, his eyes closed, Daniella asleep against his chest. An open children’s book lay on the floor beside the chair.

Tracy crept in. Dan opened his eyes. He gave her a tired smile.

She reached for Daniella and hugged her before laying her in her crib. The little girl stirred but did not wake. Tracy covered her with a blanket, and Daniella turned her head to the side, her lips moving as if nursing.

Dan put his arm around Tracy’s shoulders, and they watched Daniella for a moment before retreating from the room, leaving the door partially open so they could hear her in the night, though Tracy also slept with a baby monitor on her nightstand.

“She was fussy?” Tracy asked.

Dan shook his head. “Not too bad.”

“I’m sorry I’m late.”

“How did it go?”

She shook her head. “Not well. Moss knew we were coming.”

“How?”

“A leak. I’m worried about Del. I’m afraid he’s going to get suspended for going out there with me.”

“You and a team of wild horses weren’t going to stop him, Tracy.”

“I know. Moss doesn’t feel any guilt about what happened . . . At least not enough to do the right thing. It might not matter.”

“What do you mean?”

“I took Cerrabone to lunch today and asked his advice, as you suggested. He doesn’t think we have a case on any of the drug charges.”

“Statute of limitations?”

She nodded and told him of her conversation with Cerrabone.

“What about the death of Slocum?”

“Bottom line is we don’t have enough evidence to get very far, and Moss knows it.”

“Tell me what you do have.”

Tracy methodically went through what evidence she had, if she could get everyone to testify, and that was a big if.

Dan sighed. “I agree with Cerrabone. It’s going to be difficult to get a prosecutor to bite off on a prosecution with what you have.

What you’re missing is a through line.”