What Have You Done(74)

Sean nodded and looked around the kitchen. Dirty dishes filled the sink. “How’s Grandma and Grandpa?”

“Good. Grandma’s still sleeping. She wasn’t feeling great last night. Grandpa went to the barber. I’ll tell them you came by.”

“Yeah, you do that.” Sean got up from his seat and made his way to the sink. He turned on the water, grabbed a sponge, and started washing. “So you nervous about today?”

“Duh.”

“I could tell. What’re you nervous about? The same kids you went to middle school with will be in your classes. Same kids from the neighborhood will be in the halls. No biggie.”

Liam brought his bowl over to the sink. “That’s easy for you to say. You were popular. You had a ton of friends.”

“You do too.”

“I have a handful of friends, and I’m not popular. People don’t know me like they know you. And if they do know me, it’s because of you.”

“That still doesn’t answer my question why you’re nervous.”

Liam leaned against the counter. “It’s just… high school. What if I can’t find my locker? Or get it open? What if I can’t find my class, or I’m late because I get lost? What if I walk into the wrong class? That would be devastating.”

Sean couldn’t help but laugh. He loaded the clean dishes into a plastic drainer on the counter and wiped down the inside of the sink. “Look, I can’t lie. Some of those things might happen, but what I can tell you with one hundred percent certainty is all the other freshmen are having the same concerns. You’ll be fine. And who cares if you get lost or can’t open your locker? By this time next week, you’ll be a pro.”

“I hope you’re right.”

“I lived it for four years myself. I’m definitely right. Trust me.”

Liam walked around the kitchen table and grabbed his backpack. He stopped when he reached the hallway. “You wouldn’t want to walk me to school, would you?” he asked. “I mean, just to keep me company.”

Sean folded the towel and hung it over the side of the sink. “Why do you think I’m here?”

“Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

Without another word, the two brothers walked out of their grandparents’ home and onto the street, big brother leading little brother, a hand on Liam’s shoulder for added support. His rock. His everything.



The night stretched on. Sean sat on the edge of his bed, waiting for Don to pick him up. It was almost time. His body was numb as the memories of his brother and their childhood infiltrated a mind that was beginning to have doubts. He wondered if things had already gone past the point of no return. Perhaps it wasn’t too late to change the course of his actions. He could turn himself in, save his brother, and end all of this madness. But just as quickly as the optimism came, he batted it away with the reality of this being what it had to be. This was always how it had to be. There was no turning back now. And tonight would put things back in order.

Vanessa was lying in the bed next to him, her body a tangle of skin and sheets. Perspiration still glistened on her face and chest. She seemed satisfied. At peace. His hands shook as he reached for a bottle of Xanax next to the phone on his nightstand.

“I can do this,” he whispered to himself, popping two pills into his mouth, chasing them with a glass of water. “I can do this.”

It was a strange sensation. Sean could feel his overworked and tired mind beginning to collapse in on itself. He knew things were spinning out of control, but he didn’t know how to stop it. The prostitutes. Kerri. Rocco. And now…

“I can do this.”

Vanessa was sleeping. For a moment, there was no death or murder or future plans to worry about. There were only the two of them in that tiny bedroom.

Outside, a car horn sounded off. Sean rose from the bed and walked over to the window.

“Who’s that?” Vanessa asked as she opened her eyes and rolled over.

“It’s Don. We’re going out for a bit to look for Liam.”

“At this hour?”

“I’ve got to do something. Sitting around all day isn’t helping anything.”

“Be careful.”

“I will.”

Sean turned away from the window. “Go out the back way. I can’t afford anyone seeing you going out the front.”

“I know.”

He left the bedroom and turned out the light, hiding his most precious secret in the darkness. It was time to go.





57

It seemed as if the world had turned in for the night. The streets of Camden, New Jersey, were empty. Storefronts were dark, metal shades were drawn, alarms were activated, and inventory was locked away. Houses and apartments no longer held a window’s dotted light of life inside. Most everyone had gone to bed.

Sean and Don drove aimlessly through the streets, looking down alleyways, pulling into parking lots, checking bus terminals, and driving through the aquarium campus, searching for Liam. They each sipped a cup of coffee but said little on the ride over the bridge. The few pedestrians who were out this late hurried along the cracked and buckling sidewalks, heads down, hoods pulled up, making it difficult to identify them. Finding Liam in such a city was virtually impossible. But both men already knew Liam wasn’t anywhere near Camden. This was all a ruse.