War of Hearts(87)

He looked like she’d gutted him, and pain flared across Thea’s chest at the thought of hurting him. Still she remained steadfast against the pull of their bond.

“I would never …” He cleared his throat, furious reproach blazing in his eyes. “Do not compare me to him. There is a difference between thinking someone is a possession and belonging to someone, Thea. Whether you like it or not, this mating bond means I do belong to you and you do belong to me. Because we’re a part of each other.” His gaze darkened. “At this very moment, I wish that wasnae true because I never imagined I’d end up with a mate that could even think about asking me to do something that might kill her. Aye, I could bite you and you could live a wolf’s life, with a shorter life span, and no eternity to worry over. Or I could bite you and you could die.” He took a measured step toward her. “And I would have to live with the fact I’d killed my mate for the rest of my miserable fucking life. You would ask that of me?”

Understanding dawned and remorse instantly wiped out Thea’s anger. “You know I didn’t mean...” He was right. She hadn’t thought about that. She’d only been thinking of herself.

Not knowing what to say, Thea slumped into a chair and buried her head in her hands.

The silence between them was unbearable.

Finally, Conall moved around the room. When Thea got up the nerve to look, she saw he’d packed their stuff. Without looking at her, he shoved his car keys into his pocket and shrugged his rucksack onto one shoulder. “We need to go.”

So they did.

They left the hotel without speaking a word and as Conall drove out of Oslo toward Brevik, the distance between them grew until it overwhelmed Thea with an entirely new kind of misery.





*



Upon reaching the ferry at Brevik, Thea and Conall were displeased to discover that the freight ferry only allowed commercial vehicles onto it. Conall had turned to her, expression pinched. “I need to get Callie back as soon as possible. You have to use your gift. I’m sorry.”

She heard the genuine apology in his voice, and she understood. The truth was that if anything happened to Callie, it would destroy Conall, which in turn would destroy Thea. And that was why, even though it made her sick to her stomach, she manipulated the port authority who were checking vehicles driving onto the ferry. She made them see the SUV as a small commercial van with required papers and all.

“We do what we must to survive,” she repeated softly as Conall drove them onto the ship.

Renewed silence descended upon them as they made their way to the main lounge where they’d have to sit for the long crossing. There were tradesmen and long-haul drivers already settling in, some heading directly to the cafeteria for lunch.

Thea couldn’t even think about eating.

She followed Conall toward the back where there was a group of empty seats in the corner, but just before they reached them, he abruptly turned. Thea staggered to a halt as he towered over her. His expression was etched with harsh intensity.

“I love you,” Conall said, the words rough as if they’d been grounded out. “But I willnae force you to stay with me and endure a mating bond. Not if it makes you feel like a prisoner. When we get to England, you can leave. I dinnae expect you to come to Scotland with me and I dinnae expect you to heal Callie either. God forbid you see me as anything like that bastard who tore your back to shreds.” And on that, he strode away, fists at his sides, before pushing the door to the deck open with such force it slammed, drawing everyone’s attention.

Thea felt a sob rise from her chest and wondered what had happened to the woman who could control her goddamn emotions. Hurrying out of the lounge, away from prying eyes and ears, she held the tears in until she could find a restroom. Finally, she found the ladies’ toilets where she sat in a stall and did her best not to bawl her eyes out.

I love you.

I love you.

I love you.

He was choosing her over his sister. By setting her free, he was choosing her over Callie. He loved her so much he was letting her go.

Quiet tears slipped down Thea’s cheeks as she tried to be strong.

Yet sometimes being strong wasn’t about weathering storms alone. Sometimes being strong was admitting you needed someone.

Thea needed Conall.

More than she was comfortable with.

However, there was no changing the fact that her happiness depended upon his.

And she’d hurt him.

Pulling herself together, she drew in a shaky breath and moved back out through the lounge and onto the deck. He stood in the distance, braced against the railing as the ferry cut through the choppy waters. The wind battered him, but he was an immovable force. Conall MacLennan was the most steadfast, honorable man she’d ever met.

Thea swayed slightly as she approached him. Feeling her presence, he turned to look at her. Once upon a time his face, those wolf eyes, had been intimidating and fierce. Now they were beloved. And while others might see a menacing flatness to his expression, Thea saw the bleak. It broke her heart.

She held out a hand, praying he’d take it. “Please.”

A muscle flexed in his jaw, but he reached out and enfolded her small hand in his. She squeezed it and then turned, leading him back down the deck. They were silent as Conall followed her through the ship and back into the empty ladies’ restroom. Thea locked the door behind her and leaned against it. Conall stared around and turned to her with a questioning expression.