Velvet Devil: A Russian Mafia Romance (118)

“Maxim does have a right.”

Why the fuck would… ?

And then it hits me. Everything kind of lines up beautifully and I can see exactly what brought Isaak up here in a cold rage.

There’s no joy, no excitement…

Because he doesn’t believe that Jo is his.

“Maxim,” I say softly.

“I’m surprised he didn’t lord that one over me,” Isaak continues without noticing the change in my expression. “He fucked a baby into you. It’s the ultimate upper hand.”

I wince against his harsh words. Not just because he reduces my pregnancy down to a power play, but because the revelation seems to have sucked the humanity out of him completely.

All thought of correcting his false assumption disappears completely.

He doesn’t deserve that salvation.

So instead, I stand there, trying to think up ways of hurting him like he’s hurt me.

“Maybe he wanted to keep his child out of it,” I say. “Maybe he didn’t want her to be a power play at all. Maybe he actually has a fucking soul.”

Isaak snorts. “You really are delusional when it comes to the man, aren’t you? How did you even manage to convince him to keep the child with your sister?”

I shrug. “What’s it to you?”

“I’m curious about the plan.”

“Would you believe me if I said there was no plan?” I ask. “No, of course not. Because you see only what you want to see. You believe only what you want to believe.”

“I am impressed, though,” he says, regarding me with appraising eyes. “You managed to conceal it from me for months.”

“My daughter means the world to me,” I say resolutely. Nothing about that statement is a lie. “She’s my whole world. Anything I can do to protect her, I will.”

His eyes spark. More anger, of course, but there’s also a begrudging respect there.

“No wonder Maxim wants you back so badly.”

I shake my head with disgust. “Right. You don’t believe a man might want me because, oh I don’t know, he genuinely cares for me.”

He expression doesn’t change.

“Not every man is as cold and unfeeling as you are, Isaak.”

Not even a flinch.

And that flips a switch. I don’t want to hold back anymore. I don’t want to try and match his controlled state of calm. I’m upset and pissed and sad and emotional.

And there’s no shame in that. At least I can own my emotions. At least I can confront my demons head on. At least I’m not a broken shell of a human being.

“You know the irony of this stupid fucking tragedy?” I snap. “I actually did have feelings for you. I did actually care for you. But it’s more obvious now than ever that you don’t care about me. You never did, you never will, you never can. Maxim may have been using me at first, but at least he found room in his world for love in the end. But you? To you, I’m nothing but a tool to be used and discarded. I was a fool to think that we had a connection at all.”

He doesn’t bother disputing any of it.

And that hurts most of all.

It’s agony to see the blank, disinterested look in his eyes.

“You were never planning on letting me go, were you?” I ask, the sob catching in my throat. “You were just trying to catch me out.”

Isaak nods slowly. “You’re much too valuable to give up now.”

Again, he knows that’s going to hurt me. So he flings the words at me like unsheathing a cruelly sharp blade. I hate him in that moment. I hate his cruelty and his uncompromising nature.

Most of all, I hate the man who robbed him of his childhood and the ability to love openly and unreservedly.

“You think you’ve won, Isaak. But all you have is power. It’s nothing compared to the love of a partner, the love of a child. You have none of those things.”

“Nor do I want them,” he scoffs. “They’re only liabilities that raise the stakes.”

“You don’t want a family?” I ask tremulously.

“I have a family. The Bratva is my family.”

“The Bratva isn’t going to warm your bed at night.”

“My victories do,” he snaps. “And in the event I want more, I’ll pick a woman and she’ll fall into my bed without a second thought. Just like you did.”

The venom in his voice is meant to wound. But even though I cringe, I recognize what he’s trying to do. And I realize he wouldn’t be trying to do it unless he cared.

Just a little bit.

I move forward, buoyed by this new conviction. “I know I’ve fought you on that in the past, pretended as though you manipulated me into your bed. But I’m not going to do that now. You didn’t force me. I gave myself to you willingly. You were right before, Isaak: I wanted you from the moment I laid eyes on you. I’d never met a man like you before. You were strong and powerful and so confident. I never thought you’d look my way. But you did and it changed my world. Literally.”

I take a deep, shuddering breath and power on.

“So yes, I did want you. But I was a fool to lose myself to the fantasy of you. Because underneath all that beauty and bravado, you’re just a megalomaniac without a conscience. Or at least, that’s what you’re trying to be.”