Two Weeks (The Baxter Family #5)(46)
“Me, too.” Elise rested her elbows on the bench be hind her and looked at Cole. “What’s on your heart?”
“Really?” He took a quick breath and turned to her. A jet flew by, low and loud. He waited till it passed. “I wish you’d go to church with me. We haven’t talked a lot about God. You know?”
Six months ago Cole’s statement would’ve shut her down. She probably would’ve gotten up and walked away. But these days, God seemed possible again. Like maybe He loved her enough to have brought her here to Bloomington, Indiana. All so she could fall in love with Cole Blake.
“Thoughts?” Cole wasn’t in a hurry. Patience seemed to be at the core of his being.
“I’d like that.” She smiled at him.
“Really?” Cole sat up straight and looked at her. “You’ll go to church with me? With my family?”
“I will.” She sat up, too, and faced him. “You see God differently than I did. Back when I used to think I knew Him.”
“Hmmm. Is that a good thing?”
“Yes.” She laughed, and the sound mixed with the early springtime breeze. “I saw Him as a judge, standing over me, ready to bring the hammer down if I did something wrong.” She leaned back again. “When my mom didn’t want me to be an artist, I felt like that was the last straw. I couldn’t be what she wanted me to be—a lawyer or a doctor.” She raised her eyebrows at him. “Like you want to be.”
“Yeah.” He smiled, but she could tell he didn’t think it was funny. “Wait . . . So, that’s why you got involved with the guy?”
“Right.” Elise didn’t use his name, she knew Cole wouldn’t want to hear it. “If I couldn’t make my mom happy, I wasn’t about to make God happy. That . . . ‘guy.’ He was the only one who seemed okay with me. At least in the beginning.”
Cole looked straight ahead, like he was thinking hard about something. “You know how I told you I’d be there for you?” He turned to her. “No matter what you decide to do? About the baby?”
Elise felt her smile fade. There was something so jarring about any mention of the baby. If only she could go back and paint the picture of her life differently. The canvas would be this moment, the two of them sitting in the bleachers, young and in love with all their lives ahead of them. And Elise never would’ve talked to Randy at that party. And she wouldn’t be pregnant.
A sigh slipped from her lips. The baby changed everything, of course. “Yes.” She looked down at her tennis shoes. “You tell me all the time.”
“That’s why it matters that you come to church with me.” He took her hand in his. He worked his fingers gently between hers. “I can’t do that if we don’t have God. The two of us. First in our friendship. And later . . . in a relationship. If this goes the way I hope it does.”
A dozen feelings fought for her attention. She still wasn’t sure about God, not really. And she didn’t want to be forced. But the way Cole said it she felt peace come over her. Like if he was going to lean on God, then she could certainly lean on Cole. “I understand.” She nodded and felt a chill run down her arms. “I like that.”
Cole studied her for a minute. “Good.” He smiled and looked away. “Because if you want to raise this baby, I’m staying with you. I’ll get a job and take classes online.” For a few seconds neither of them said anything. They took off their sunglasses so they could look into each other’s eyes. Then Cole stood and pulled her close. The hug lasted longer than usual and when he eased back he put his hands along either side of her face. “I love you, Elise.”
She didn’t hesitate. “I love you, too.”
The moment grew more intense, the feelings between them clearly stronger than before. Cole moved in closer, and Elise thought for sure he was going to kiss her. But then he took a quick breath and stepped back.
He exhaled hard and walked a few steps away. When he looked at her, she could see the alarm in his face. “I’m sorry. I . . . That’s not what I want to do.”
Elise wanted nothing more than to kiss him. But she knew what he meant. “It’s okay.”
“I mean . . .” He came closer again, his eyes full of apology. “I respect you more than that other guy, Elise. I care more.” He paused. “I want to be different. God wants me to love you like a sister. At least for now.”
“A sister?” Hurt and confusion added to the emotions already swirling inside her. Her voice raised a little. “I don’t want to be your sister, Cole. Is that what you think?” She turned away and started back down the bleachers. She had made it to their bikes when he caught up with her.
“Hey, wait.” He put his hand on her shoulder. “No. That’s not what I mean.” The passion and heat in his eyes went way beyond friendship. He breathed hard. “I’m saying, God wants me to treat you with respect. Later . . . when we get married . . .” Passion layered his expression. “I don’t want to be your brother . . . or your friend, Elise.” He raked his fingers through his hair. “I want nothing more than to kiss you.” He crossed his arms, like he was making a serious effort to keep control.
She felt like she was soaring, back on her bike, wind in her hair. “So you mean . . .”