The Wedding Party (The Wedding Date, #3)(41)

She patted him on the head.

“No, really, that’s not it. I saw it accidentally, just because I follow Alexa on Twitter, and I had some downtime this afternoon and was clicking around, and . . .”

That was a lie. That wasn’t how she knew. She’d started following a bunch of local news reporters on Twitter in the past month, just so she would know what he meant when he talked about work.

“I’m so mad at myself. I never do shit like that, but this guy has had it in for me for a long time, and I finally snapped. The mayor just laughed it off, but I still don’t know if he was serious about that. What a nightmare. No wonder I was so distracted that I left my keys at work.”

Maddie ran her fingernails over his short hair, again and again. He closed his eyes.

“That feels nice. You shouldn’t reward me for being a jackass.”

She pushed his head into her lap.

“You weren’t a jackass, you were just pushed to the brink, that’s all. I’ve been there. I don’t blame you.”

The weird thing was that if this had happened just a few months ago, she would have laughed at smug, mansplaining, know-it-all Theo being publicly humiliated. Now she just felt bad for him.

He swung his legs up onto the other end of the couch.

“That makes one of us, at least. I never should have let that guy bait me in the first place, but I’m just so fucking sick of guys like that thinking I don’t know what I’m talking about.” He sighed. “The problem is, people like me can’t get away with blowing their fuse at work. Ever. One false move and it could all come tumbling down. I know I have to work twice as hard and be twice as good, but sometimes that just really gets to me.”

She could relate.

“I get it. Sometimes it really gets to me, too. But don’t you think you have enough credit with your boss by this point that he won’t fire you for popping off at a reporter one time?”

He shrugged.

“I mean, I hope so. But I’m always paranoid about stuff like this.” He sat up. “My brother thinks I’m neurotic about everything because . . .” He shook his head. “Well, for a lot of reasons we don’t need to get into. But I’ve been like this for a long time now. I always feel like I can’t take a step out of line.”

She and Theo were very different people, but she really got how he felt.

“Yeah. Other people get the benefit of the doubt when something goes wrong or when they have an off day, but we never do.”

He looked up at her and nodded.

“Yeah, exactly. Sometimes we just have to explode, you know?”

That part, she was good at.

“Oh, I know.” They grinned at each other.

“That’s one of the reasons I got into this kind of work: we have to prove ourselves over and over and over again, and maybe you think it’s stupid, but the clothes you’re wearing while you prove yourself matter. I know you’re going to say they shouldn’t matter, it should all be about abilities and qualifications, et cetera, but that’s not how it is, especially for women of color, and we have to work with the world we live in.”

He shook his head.

“I don’t think it’s stupid, and I wasn’t going to say that. I totally agree with you. You see what I wear to work every day. I know this stuff matters.” He looked down. “You know, Maddie, I’ve been meaning to . . . I don’t think your work is silly or frivolous or any of those things. That first time we met . . .” He let out a breath. “I mean, speaking of a time I was a jackass. Before that I didn’t know stylists even existed, so I didn’t understand what you meant. I know I asked you about it in the worst way possible. But I don’t want you to think that I ever thought—or think now—that the work you do is somehow less than.”

Oh. Wow. That was something she’d never expected to hear from Theo Stephens.

She squeezed his hand.

“Thanks for saying that. I really appreciate it.”

He squeezed back.

“Sorry it took me so long to say it, and that I had to have a very public humiliation that reminded me how insufferable I can be first. I guess that’s why I waited years to say it; I was so pissed at how true what you said about me was.”

She opened her mouth to deny that. The weird thing was, she didn’t think it was true anymore. Though . . . it had felt pretty true at the time. She bit her lip, and he laughed at her.

“See? You were about to try to make me feel better, but you couldn’t lie to me.”

She shook her head.

“Look, I’m not going to say you didn’t deserve what I said, but if you’d ever been as bad as I thought you were, Alexa would have murdered you. But no matter what, you definitely aren’t the person I thought you were.”

He kissed her cheek.

“Thanks for that. I appreciate it.” He reached for his wineglass. “Speaking of your work, what’s going on with that TV show? Last time you said you were playing phone tag with the station manager?”

She smiled. She’d been waiting to tell him.

“I have a real interview in a few weeks. I’m talking with people from the station, and he said they’re going to bring in someone from the shelter they’re working with so they can see how I work with her.”

He pulled her into a hug.