The Temporary Wife: Luca and Valentina's Story(37)
“No,” I reassure him. “But we both know this’ll end someday. Three years will fly by, and once it’s all over, I want true freedom of my own. I want my own life without being tied down by the past. Sometimes it’s like you forget who you are. It’d be impossible for me to escape the Windsor name if our marriage was publicized.”
Luca sits down on my bed, his gaze pensive. It’s odd having him here. I’ve lived in this apartment for the last five years, but he’s never once been in my bedroom. He looks huge sitting on my small bed, and having him in my space makes me feel strangely flustered.
What will it be like to live with him? Despite our close working relationship, it isn’t common for us to hang out together. I have no idea who he even is when he isn’t working. I’ve seen him around his family, but that isn’t quite the same.
“I’m ready,” I tell him as I close my duffel bag. “This is all I really need for the next few days.”
Luca nods and takes the bag from me. “I’ll have some movers come in to pack the rest for you.”
I glance around my bedroom, my heart heavy. This is the first real home I’ve ever had of my own. It feels bittersweet to leave it behind. “What will happen to this apartment? Will you give it to another staff member?”
Luca glances over his shoulder and chuckles. “Mrs. Windsor,” he says, his voice low and dangerous. “You don’t quite realize that you’re the only one in my entire company that got this specific perk, do you? This apartment is yours. It always will be. I just never formally signed it over to you because I was worried you wouldn’t accept it.”
I stare at his broad back as he leads me back to his car. Mrs. Windsor. I suppose that’s who I am now. It’s so surreal.
Luca holds the car door open for me, and I frown. Normally, that’s the driver’s job, and when the driver isn’t there, like today, it’s my job. “You’re my wife now,” he says, a small smile on his face. “It’s my duty and privilege to do these kinds of things for you. We aren’t at work right now, Valentina.”
My thoughts are reeling as I take a seat. Luca seems different now, less abrasive, and I don’t know what to make of it. “Is it true?” I ask when he sits down next to me.
He turns to face me and grabs my hand, holding it in his. His gaze drops to our hands, and he slowly entwines our fingers, his touch gentle. “Yes,” he says.
“Why? Why would you give me company perks no one else had?”
The way his thumb rubs over the back of my hand is distracting, and it throws me off. I wasn’t expecting him to be gentle with me. I thought everything would stay the same with the exception of us sleeping together occasionally, but this tenderness… it’s surprising. When he acts this way, it’s like I don’t know him at all.
Luca looks into my eyes, his expression one I’ve never seen before. “Does it matter?” He looks away for a moment and sighs. “To be honest, I’m not sure either. I just knew I wanted to do more for you, but I never really thought too hard about why. I just did it.”
I stare at his profile, admiring his straight nose and his strong jaw. I always tried not to look at him too long, out of fear it’d be considered unprofessional, but today I’m getting my fill. “For years, I thought you hated me.”
He smiles then. “I did, at the start. I still don’t know why my grandmother hired you back then, and I don’t like that. I felt manipulated, and I was convinced you had ulterior motives... But at some point, those feelings morphed into something else altogether, without me even realizing it. I kept convincing myself that I couldn’t stand you, but all the while, I kept relying on you more, until you became indispensable to me.” Luca looks into my eyes, and my heart skips a beat. “How could I hate you when you’re the only person I can see myself spending three years with? When you told me that you quit, I was a fucking wreck, Valentina. Nah. I don’t hate you. I hate how much I fucking want you. I hate how beautiful you are, and I hate how much you mess with my mind. Above all, I always hated that you weren’t mine.”
I tear my gaze away, my cheeks flushed and my heart pounding wildly. The man holding my hand… he isn’t the cold and indifferent Luca I know. I don’t recognize this version of him, and it terrifies me.
It terrifies me, because this version of Luca? This is a man I could lose my heart to.
Chapter Twenty-Six
Valentina
My heart is thumping in my chest as I sit up in Luca’s bed, my most conservative pajamas covering every inch of me. I purposely chose the ugliest, rattiest, most old-fashioned pajamas I’ve got. It’s a black and white checkered two-piece, and it makes me look like a freaking Dalmatian. I don’t think I’ve ever looked quite this unattractive before.
I can’t even figure out why I’m acting this way. I’m not one to get scared, or to be intimidated, yet the idea of spending the night with Luca fills me with a strange kind of anxiety. Everything happened so quickly that I haven’t had a chance to truly let it sink in. How are we supposed to go from weeks of arguments and distance to… whatever this is? We can’t.
The distinct sound of the shower running fills my ears, keeping my nerves sky-high. I’ve been in Luca’s home countless times, yet it all feels brand new and unfamiliar. I still remember when he had this place renovated, two years after we started working together. Back then, he still hadn’t given up on making me quit, and he’d made me decorate his entire house for him.