The Summer We Fell (The Summer, #1)(9)

“No iced tea?” asks Pastor Dan.

“You want caffeine this late?” Donna frets. She manages him sometimes like he’s her father, not her husband, especially since his visit to the cardiologist last winter.

“I’ve got to go back to the church for a counseling session,” he reminds her. “I need to perk up.”

She glances at me with an apologetic smile. “Juliet, honey, do you mind grabbing it?”

“Can you get the Tabasco while you’re up too?” Danny asks as I swing my legs over the bench.

It isn’t a big deal, but Luke’s nostrils flare once more. The Allens have always made me feel like I can still become a better person, but Luke’s silent, constant disdain says something else entirely.

“Juliet, you fucking fake. This isn’t you at all.”

And I know it’s not. But is it so wrong that I want to change? That I still think I can become better than I am?

“You’re a saint,” Donna tells me when I carry it over.

I sit and Luke’s hard gaze meets mine. “Oops.” He holds up the milk. “Looks like it’s empty.”

There’s a challenge in his eyes. “Go ahead, Juliet. Be a good girl and hop up again. We’re all half done and you haven’t eaten a bite, but let’s watch you play your part. ”

A crack forms in my shell when he’s around, and I can already feel the old, bad version of me slipping through it. “You’ve got two legs,” I reply.

A glint flickers in his eye. “Not very saintly of you, Juliet.”

“Neither is the way you wandered off with that blonde last night.”

“Juliet,” Donna gently scolds.

Luke has won this round. He wanted to prove I’m an asshole and he did. By the end of the summer, they won’t want me anywhere near them. I grip the table, preparing to rise for the third time, suddenly near tears.

“Don’t,” Luke growls, standing up. “I’ve got it.”

The air hangs heavy between me and Luke for the rest of dinner, but the Allens don’t even seem to notice. They are baby fish, being circled by two Great Whites. They won’t know what’s happened until Luke and I have devoured them all.



WE’VE STARTED HANGING out at the beach most nights with a group of surfers—Caleb, Beck, and Harrison—rich college kids who simply want to sit around a bonfire with a beer in hand and a girl beside them while they talk about surfing. Sometimes Libby comes—she’s joined the choir too—but, otherwise, I stick out like a sore thumb.

Maybe it’s that I’m not rich. Maybe it’s that I’m not in college, but it’s also that I don’t dress like the other girls do, don’t act like they do.

I’m not sitting in Danny’s lap. I’m not making jokes about blow jobs or teasing someone about the long, hard night ahead. These girls are out here in little more than bikinis while I’m dressed like an Allen—nothing fitted, nothing cropped.

And I’m tired of it. I’m tired of staying covered up all the time, as if I’ve got something to be ashamed of, tired of the way things with Danny never progress.

I pull off my hoodie. I’m wearing a tank top and cut-offs, more than most of the girls here, but I feel conspicuous anyway.

Danny’s in a heated discussion with the guy beside him about where the biggest waves are and doesn’t even notice, but Luke’s teeth grind as he looks away. The girl in his lap barely even has her nipples covered, but me and my tank top are an issue.

If Danny notices I’ve removed the hoodie, he shows no sign of it. For the next hour, though, Luke’s jaw grinds and he looks at anything but me until suddenly he’s on his feet, tugging the girl in his lap off into the darkness.

When Danny and I leave to get ice cream, he suggests I put the hoodie back on. “Just in case we see anyone we know,” he adds.

So he did notice, and the only effect is that he’s apparently…embarrassed?

I get mint chip with sprinkles, and he—fittingly—gets vanilla. A couple passes us as we return to the truck, pushing a sleeping baby in a stroller.

“I can’t wait to have kids,” says Danny. “This is a good place to raise them.”

I love that he thinks about what would make his kids happy. I love that he thinks about the future.

From what I’ve heard, my dad didn’t think too much about the future, and he sure as shit didn’t care about making his kids happy. He’d taken off before I hit my first birthday.

But the future is a long time away. I’m still in high school, and I’ve barely lived yet. I want to know what it’s like to sit on someone’s lap with a beer in hand. I want to know what it’s like to be pulled into the darkness, willingly.

I want good memories to replace all the bad ones Justin left behind.

When Danny pulls into the driveway and I see that all the lights are out inside, I slide toward him and climb into his lap. “Kiss me.”

He blinks, guiltily looking around before leaning down to give me a small, soft kiss. I can tell he’s



about to pull away, so I kiss him harder, my mouth open, my tongue seeking his.

He’s been careful with me for so long but he doesn’t need to be. I lean closer, pressing myself against him until I feel him harden. It thrills me, as if we’ve finally climbed aboard a train I’ve been waiting on for a very long time. But no sooner has it started than he grabs my hips and pushes me away.