The Storm Crow (The Storm Crow, #1)(13)

“At least I wouldn’t have had to marry Ericen.”

“This isn’t funny, Anthia!”

I surged to my feet. “I am not laughing. Has it occurred to you that maybe whoever tried to kill me wanted to stop me from marrying Ericen? That your decision to ship me off to another kingdom is what nearly cost me my life?”

Caliza stiffened, drawing upright, but it was Captain Mirkova who answered. “You’ve been much removed from Aris lately, Your Highness. Your city has changed. There are people in it who would not find delight in seeing your face.”

I swallowed hard, collapsing back into the chair. “You think they did this because they’re angry?”

“It’s very possible,” Caliza said. She sat down across from me, her shoulders rounded. The sight of her with anything less than immaculate posture made my throat tighten. She looked so small.

I thought back to the cold, hard faces of the men. No one had ever looked at me like that. I’d walked freely through Aris’s streets, visiting the canal market in the Rynthene Wing or the weapons masters of the Turren Wing. People had smiled and waved. But that was before Ronoch, before Illucia took everything from us.

“They have to know we’re trying our best.” The words stuck in my throat. Because I knew they were a lie. By their silence, Caliza and Captain Mirkova did too.

Caliza was doing her best. I was hiding.

Caliza straightened. “I’m forbidding you from leaving the castle without my permission.”

I started. “You’re joking.”

“We can’t risk this not being an isolated incident. I mean it, Anthia. I’ll post guards if I need to.”

I almost laughed. For months, I’d hidden in these walls, and now that I wanted to leave, I wasn’t allowed?

I stood. “What a time for you to take an interest in my well-being.”

Her lips parted, but I didn’t wait for a response before stalking from the room. Kiva fell into step beside me. The blood had dried on her shirt and skin, turning a muddy brown. She looked as exhausted as I felt.

We climbed the stairs to the second floor. “What did your mother say?” I asked.

Kiva’s expression turned grim as it always did when we discussed Captain Mirkova. “The usual.” Her voice changed as she mimicked her mother’s Korovi accent. “Here I thought you were good enough to work alone, Sakiva. You need to train more. Perhaps I shouldn’t have you teaching my new recruits, Sakiva, if you’re going to make mistakes like that. You should know better than to go alone.”

“You nearly sounded like her that time,” I said with a small smile.

I returned to my room, where my bed sat warm and inviting with the promise that if I climbed under the covers, everything would be okay again when I came out. My people wouldn’t hate me, Ericen wouldn’t be arriving tomorrow, and the crow would hatch and protect us from Illucia.

I didn’t try to fight it.





Four


The next morning, I lay beneath the darkness and warmth of the covers and tried not to think about what was coming. I’d never met Prince Ericen, but everything about Illucia made my stomach turn. Their vain focus on appearances, their militaristic lifestyle, their cold, rainy weather; I hated it all.

Groaning, I rolled over to face the massive floor-to-ceiling windows on one side of my room. Windows meant to open for crows. The sight made me feel even worse. I’d been trying to convince myself to get up for hours.

On the nightstand beside my bed, papers had been tossed in a haphazard pile. Letters. Some were from riders and house lords and ladies, others from soldiers I’d sparred with during training. Some were even from Caliza, written in invisible ink made from shadow crow feathers, like we’d done as children. All failed attempts to cheer me up. All asking if I was okay, if they could help. I didn’t deserve it.

Useless. The word echoed in my head, and images from my ride through the city yesterday joined it. People selling fake mementos on the dusty ground, Brynth masons with ice in their eyes, that little girl silently asking me why.

A fire kindled in my chest, but it wasn’t the first time I had lain there and let it die.

Someone knocked, and Kiva entered. The dullness in her normally bright eyes was stark, and her characteristically perfect braid was loose and frayed.

I frowned. “Don’t you have morning training?”

“My mother decided she wanted to take over for now.” She sat on the edge of my bed.

“Are you all right?” The question came out before I could stop it, and her reaction was what I expected.

Her jaw set, eyes narrowing. “I’m fine.”

I sighed, forcing the questions back down with the utmost restraint.

“You’re still in bed,” she noted.

I looked away, and something squirmed in my stomach. This was the worst part. The moment when I knew I needed to act, but my body refused to comply. With only days to hatch the egg, I needed a plan. But the need felt like it’d been swallowed by quicksand, there but buried.

You’re running out of time. Move.

Nothing.

“I could go get the bucket of water”—Kiva stopped with a smile as I shot her a glare—“or you can at least sit up.”

Grudgingly, I pushed myself up against the headboard and pulled the covers above my chest. This was ridiculous. Ericen would be here soon, and as much as I wanted to stay hidden in my room, I had to accept what was happening and handle it like a princess of Rhodaire should.