The Stand-In(106)

“I understand.”

“I should have told you before I came but…” Her voice trails off. “I wasn’t thinking.”

I give her a hug. “She’s your mother, too.”

Mom has already risen out of her chair, her arms outstretched and her face alight. Both of us go and embrace her. “You look like my little girl,” she whispers. Then she begins to speak in Mandarin. Thanks to my app, I’m getting better but Sam has to translate because although Fangli opens her mouth, no words come out.

“She thinks Fangli simply looks like her daughter,” he whispers. “She doesn’t know.”

Even as he speaks, Mom’s expression changes and she opens her eyes wide, her gaze fluttering between me and Fangli. “My girl?” she whispers.

“It’s me,” Fangli whispers. “Me.”

Mom looks at me, and I give Fangli a hug. “It’s her, Mom. We found each other,” I say. “And now she’s found you.”

“My baby.” Mom’s shaking, groping at her neck for her pendant, which she clutches in her hand. “I’m sorry, my baby. Qing yuan liang wo.”

“Forgive me,” Sam murmurs in my ear.

My new sister doesn’t take her hungry eyes off our mother. “Please, let me have some time alone with her,” Fangli says. Mom looks happy so I only hesitate for a moment. Sam tugs my hand to lead me out into the hallway and then outside.

“I don’t want to go too far,” I say. Not with my family there.

“We can stay right here.” He brings me to a small, empty playground to the side of the home, a place for visiting grandchildren to play.

Now that I’m with him, I don’t know what to say. He saves me.

“I never thought it was you who called ZZTV,” he says.

“I know now.” I rub my cheek. Sam managed to tell me about his feelings. I can be as brave. “I was hurt you thought it was me, even though it was only in my head.”

“I’m sorry.” Sam sits down on the bottom of the wide slide and I join him. “I knew how I felt about you was different, but I never made it clear enough.”

“I never knew where I stood with you, whether you were acting or not.”

“Tell me what I can do to make you trust me. I’ll do it.”

I bump my head into his shoulders. “You already did when you came here today.”

He wraps his arms around me. “I missed you. Missed talking to you.” He runs a finger over my lower lip. “Missed kissing you.” A small kiss drops on my temple.

“It’s been a while.”

“Seventeen days,” he says promptly, then goes red when I look at him. “I mean, about that.”

“Give or take?”

“I was counting each day. Sue me.” Another kiss, this time on my hair.

“You were supposed to be in China.”

“I went to talk to my mother.”

“Fangli mentioned it.”

He leans against me. “It was quite the event and, as you know, culminated with her telling the media I was marrying Fangli.”

I know it’s not true but the memory of the feelings I had when I thought it was remain and they sting.

He twists around to look at me. “We’re not. I love Fangli, but as one of my truest friends.”

“I know,” I assure him. Although Fangli told me the same thing, hearing it from Sam hits deeper and releases the last bit of doubt I didn’t know I had.

We sit in silence for a moment, watching as a gray squirrel runs by, fluffy tail undulating. “Cute,” he murmurs.

It is, especially when it stops to look at us, but I’m not here to admire tree rodents. “How are you doing?” I ask.

“Good,” he says with some surprise. “It was…frightening.” He goes red. “A stupid thing to say.”

“No, I get it.” I did, too. Lili is no Todd, but there can be people in our lives who take on more of a presence and influence than they deserve. “How is she now?”

“She won’t speak with me, but my father agreed with me. She’s furious at us both.” His dimples show in a wry smile. “She’ll understand one day. I hope.”

I tuck myself under his arm. “You did good.”

“Not as good as you with Eppy.”

“Thanks to you.”

He shrugs. “No one would have cared if it didn’t work. It does. You were great on the interviews.”

“You saw them?”

“Of course. In part because I couldn’t miss them. You were everywhere.”

I grin. “I know.” There goes keeping under the radar and not taking risks. “Robin Banerjee called. I don’t have to find a job. I can work on Eppy because he’s funding me.”

Sam whoops. “I knew he would. That’s my Gracie.”

His Gracie. I probably like the sound of that more than I should.

“You’ll be busier.” He runs his hand over my hair.

“You’re one to talk,” I point out. “Don’t you leave to shoot a movie soon?”

“Yeah.” He coughs. “Hey. Do you think you can add one more task into your Eppy list?”

“Like what?”