The Right Swipe (Modern Love, #1)(91)

“You’re not a violent person.”

He raised an eyebrow. He was a big guy, her brother, yet those huge fingers could manage the most delicate fine-line tattoos. “Anyone’s violent with the right provocation. I choose not to be violent, that’s different.”

She fiddled with the edge of her blanket. “Are you mad Peter hurt me, or mad you didn’t know?”

Gabe put the ax down carefully and walked over to her. “Both.”

She scooted over, making room for him on her blanket. “That doesn’t make sense.”

He gathered her hands in his and paused for a moment, like he was organizing his thoughts. “I’m your brother. I’m supposed to protect you.”

“You’re younger than me.”

“Right, which mattered when we were both young. In school, I couldn’t stand up for you because I wasn’t big enough. I barely saw you after you went away to college. But this? I find out some guy hurt you so bad, it almost destroyed your career? The career that’s your life? How do you think I’m supposed to feel?”

“I don’t need anyone to protect me.”

He frowned. “I love you, Rhi. Of course I’m going to protect you. It’s not failure to accept protection sometimes.”

She thought of how she’d called Samson to her room to scare Peter away. Could she have done it herself? Maybe. Had it been nice to have a shield? Yes.

Gabe squeezed her hand. “I know you’ve always considered yourself the provider of our little family. I never thought of the toll it must take on you. My sister, she’s one tough bitch. That’s what I’d tell my friends.”

“I’m a bit concerned you called me a bitch to your friends.”

Gabe chuckled. “Only in a good way. You’re an alpha. But alphas need to rest. And they need to recoup. And they need to cry and be vulnerable and take a break from taking care of everyone.”

Her throat grew tight. “I always thought I couldn’t show any weakness. Like my career depended on me being strong.”

“You’re strong no matter what. You’re strong for speaking up about Peter, you’d be the same degree of strong if you’d stayed silent.” He tapped her shoulders, and she consciously lowered them. “It’s not a weakness to take care of yourself. Asking for and taking what you need to function should never be considered a weakness.”

“I don’t think I know how to ask for what I need.”

“Think of it this way. You delegate a million and one things at work, right? Lakshmi makes your plane reservations. Suzie runs interference on marketing stuff. All of your employees take something off your plate, either because they’re better at it or because it’s stuff you don’t want to do.”

“Yes.”

“So delegate in your personal life.”

“Delegating. That I understand.” She licked her dry lips. “Trust is harder to figure out.”

“Mmm.” He looked off into the distance, and a soft smile played on his lips. She knew that smile. He was thinking about his fiancée. “Trust is the only reason the world ever functions as it should. Sometimes it works out and sometimes it doesn’t, and I know that uncertainty is scary, but that’s the only way you figure out who your closest people are.”

They sat in silence and listened to the birds chirping. There were no traffic noises here, no concrete. Out of habit, she patted her pocket. No phone.

She inhaled and released a deep breath and finally allowed herself the freedom to think about the man she’d been forcing herself to avoid obsessing over since yesterday. Hell, since she’d left him, standing in a home that belonged to neither of them. “There’s a guy.”

“Samson Lima.” Gabe smiled at her surprised expression. “I watch the videos. Not a huge football fan, but I know of him. He seemed cool and you were clearly into him.”

“Clearly?” She’d thought she’d done a good job of maintaining a friendly distance between them on camera.

“Clearly to anyone who knows you like I do.”

That was a relief. “He . . . it’s a long story.” She ran through what had happened at Annabelle’s home.

Gabe wrinkled his nose. “Gave him the old Rhi-Rhi dead-to-me treatment, huh? How do you feel about that decision?”

“Not good. I mean, I was miserable about it before, but now I’m pretty sure he didn’t actually tell Annabelle about me and Peter. I jumped the gun and assumed the worst. Probably because I was already low-key freaked out about how close we’d gotten.” The first time she’d cut him out, he’d at least done the thing she’d accused him of doing, extenuating circumstances or not.

Her stomach churned. The way she’d treated him at Annabelle’s hadn’t been fair.

Gabe shrugged and bent his leg, resting his arm on his knee. “So tell him you’re sorry.”

“He probably wouldn’t take my call. I’d never take anyone back if they treated me like that.” She twisted her fingers together. Why would he want someone as difficult and downright annoying as her? She’d watched the video Matchmaker had released last week, of Samson with a pretty young woman.

He hadn’t told her he’d gone on another date, though it must have been filmed before they’d met up at Annabelle’s home, during that week when he’d been wooing her by sending her food. Sweet, kind, loyal. The girl had been a kindergarten teacher, for crying out loud, and their rapport had been excellent, both of them smiling, nice people. She couldn’t compete with that.