The Perfect Child(95)

“Daddy!” Janie squealed, flying off the bed and into my arms in record time. I wrapped my arms around her and twirled her around as she giggled. I smothered her with kisses all over her face.

Viviane took a seat on the bed against the other wall. Janie’s room was arranged much like my college dorm room during freshman year—a twin bed pushed against each wall. I wished I could meet with her alone, but the judge had ordered supervised visitation only. He’d promised to revisit the issue at our next court date.

Janie tugged on my hand. “Daddy, look. See?” She pointed at her walls. They were covered in a collage of her artwork. Drawings and paintings with bright colors and thick, solid lines brought life to her room. Most of them were done in purple and pink. Smack in the center was one of a man and a little girl holding hands underneath a rainbow. My eyes filled with tears. I struggled to contain them.

I’d never been blinded by love before. I’d thought that was reserved for romantic love, but it wasn’t. I loved Janie in ways I couldn’t describe or understand. I probably never would. Even after everything she’d done.

I carried her over to the wall and tapped the picture. I grinned at her as she smiled back. “This one is my favorite.”



Cole had fallen asleep early, something that was so rare. He had been with my mom since the funeral, and we had finally gotten him back into our custody. Piper had worked out an agreement with the judge after Hannah had pleaded guilty to child abuse. There was no way our new social worker would be able to get things done as quickly as Piper.

It was his second night home, and last night had been rough. He’d screamed for most of it, but unlike before, when Hannah had tended to him all night long and woken at his slightest sound, last night she had put in her earplugs and rolled over to go back to sleep. I’d taken him into the living room until he had calmed down. It had looked like it had physically hurt her to watch me walk out of the room with Cole, but allowing me to take care of him during the night was part of her treatment plan, since sleep was one of the most important factors in her recovery.

It was like Cole had sensed we needed him to go easy on us tonight. It usually took him over an hour to fall asleep, but he’d been out within ten minutes. Hannah and I had been sitting at the kitchen table ever since, just staring into our tea. It had long grown cold, but we stayed rooted to our spots. Everything between us felt strange and forced. We moved around each other in the house like awkward roommates. We’d barely spoken since I had gotten back from my visit with Janie. She’d asked how it had gone but then had walked away before I could answer.

My phone buzzed in my pocket. It’d been going off for the past hour, but I had been ignoring all my calls. I could do that now that I didn’t have to worry about getting called in to the hospital. Dan had put me on administrative leave last week. He’d said it was only temporary, but I wasn’t sure I believed him.

Suddenly, the house phone rang, and we both jumped. No one called on our house phone unless it was an emergency. Most of the time I forgot we had it. I looked at Hannah. She shook her head. Neither of us moved.

It cut off only to start again a few seconds later. What if something was wrong with one of our parents? I felt like throwing up. The room spun when I stood. I grabbed the phone from its spot on the counter. “Hello?” I said.

Piper’s voice was hurried, breathless. “Christopher, I’m two minutes away from your house. Don’t pick up your phone if anyone calls, and don’t answer your door. I’m going to come around the back.”

The line went dead.

I hung the receiver up slowly. She never called this late. What was going on?

“That was Piper,” I said.

Nothing.

Were we even supposed to talk to her now that she wasn’t on the case? What was allowed? How was Hannah not burning with curiosity? Didn’t she have questions?

“She’s on her way over,” I said.

Still nothing. Hannah’s shoulders were hunched together like she was trying to disappear inside herself. She wore the stare that meant she’d slipped away. The one that made me want to beg her to talk to me, to just let me inside again. But I didn’t. She’d come to me when she was ready. I fought against the fear that she never would. I took her hand in mine. She didn’t jerk it away; at least that was something.

It wasn’t long before there was a tap at our back door. Nobody ever used that one. Piper stood on the step, panting and sweating like she’d run a mile. “I hopped the fence,” she said.

I motioned for her to come inside. I peeked around the corner of the door, half expecting someone to be chasing her.

“Do you want a glass of water?” I asked, locking the door behind us.

“That’d be great.” She took a minute to gather her breath while I poured it. Normally, Hannah would’ve asked her if she needed anything else, but she didn’t have enough energy to say hello. I was surprised I’d gotten her out of bed today. Yesterday, she’d refused.

“I had to get here before they did,” Piper said after she’d taken a drink.

“Who? Who’s coming?”

“Probably the police.”

“Why are the police coming?” I asked.

This got Hannah’s attention. She smoothed her hair back away from her face and sat up straight in her chair.