The Passenger (The Passenger, #1)(40)

You’ve driven me to it. Where’s Bobby Boy?

He’s gone to bed.

The Kid hauled out his watch and opened it. A few faint notes of bellchime. I guess you went for a late snack after the clubs closed.

Maybe. If it’s any of your business.

You could give me a little credit you know. All I’ve done for you.

All you’ve done?

Yeah.

You’ve endarkened my soul.

Jesus. You’ve got a pretty short memory. How can you say shit like that? Is that a serious comment? Wait a minute. Bobbsy’s on his way up here. Isnt he?

No.

The object of your sordid affections. That’s his tread on the staircase.

You’re disgusting.

The wholly devoted. Well well. I guess I’d better skedaddle.

You’re full of it. There’s no one on the stairs. I’m going to bed.

Jesus. What are you doing?

I’m getting undressed.

You cant do that.

Watch me.

The Kid covered his face. Christ, he said. Now where are you going?

She crossed the room with her clothes over her arm. I’m going to hang up my things. Why? Is there someone in here?

She opened the closet door and put her shoes in the rack and hung up her skirt and blouse and closed the door and padded back across the floor in her underwear and climbed into bed and pulled up the covers and switched off the lamp on the table. Good night, she said.

She cowled herself in the quilt and lay listening. After a while she pushed back the covers. The Kid was still at her desk. How long are you going to sit there?

I dont know. It’s quiet.

Dont you have other clients you could be seeing?

No.

I’m sorry I was mean to you.

Really?

Yes.

It’s okay.

I’m going to sleep now.

Okay. Good night.

Good night.



* * *





When she’d filled out the forms she went back to the desk and the nurse took them and looked them over and then handed her another one.

Cant I just write: Do with me what you will. And sign it?

No. You cant.

They gave her a locker key and a gown and a pair of slippers and sent her down the hall. In the room she undressed and folded her clothes and put them in the locker and pulled on the gown and found the strings and tied them. Then she sat on the bench and thought about what she had decided to do. A woman came in and smiled briefly at her and opened a locker at the end of the row. Just like heaven, she said. You trade everything in for a robe.

Did you ever play heaven when you were a child? Dress up in sheets and sit around?

No, said the woman. She turned her back on the girl and began to undress. She put on the gown and tied it and stepped into the slippers and shut the locker door and locked it. She shuffled past with the key in her hand and the girl told her that she was supposed to pin the key to her gown so that she wouldnt lose it but the woman just went past and out into the hall.

After a while she got up and shut the locker door and locked it. Then she pinned the key to her gown and stepped into the slippers and went out.

In the examining room she sat on a gurney while a nurse took her temperature and her pulse and bloodpressure. You’re a quiet one, she said.

I know. I’ve got a lot to be quiet about.

The nurse smiled. She tied off the girl’s arm with a length of rubber tubing and pulled at the tubing and let it snap. Then she fitted her with an IV and taped it down and an orderly came and wheeled her down the hallway.

A cold white room. After a while a woman came in and looked at her chart. How are you? she said.

I’m okay. So far so good. Who are you?

I’m Doctor Sussman. Why are you by yourself?

I’m not by myself. I’m schizophrenic. Are you going to shave my head?

No. We’re not.

Are you the one who’s going to fry me?

No one’s going to fry you. Do you have any questions?

Do you have a fire extinguisher handy?

The doctor tilted her head and studied her. I suppose. Why?

In case my hair catches fire.

Your hair’s not going to catch fire.

Then what’s the fire extinguisher for?

You’re making a joke.

Yeah. Sort of.

You dont have any questions?

No.

Nothing that you’d like to know? You’re not curious.

I cant answer that without being rude. Anyway I’m not here because of what I want to know. Quite the opposite.

What medications are you on? There’s nothing here.

I know. I flushed em.

The doctor studied the sheet on the clipboard. She tapped her lower lip with her pen. The nurse had come in and stood fitting a syringe to the IV. She looked at the doctor.

I flushed em, she said again.

Yes. I heard you.

Does that mean you up the amps?

No.

The doctor had moved out of sight behind her. The nurse took a jar from the counter and opened it and began to smear electrolytic gel over her temples. The gel was cold.

Where’s the doctor?

I’m here, said the doctor.

I’m going to pass out now.

Yes. It’s all right.

When she woke in the recovery room she’d no sense that any time had passed. It was night. At first she thought she was in her bed at home. But she had a rubber biteguard in her mouth. She spat it out. There was a burnt smell in the darkness. Something rank and slightly sulphurous. She put her hand to the plastic nametag around her wrist. That’s me. I can check and see.