The Midnight Lie (The Midnight Lie #1)(14)

“Nirrim?”

Let him talk to himself, if he was so bored. He, who could insult a guard and get away with it. How could he do such a thing, even as a Middling?

He said, “I have offended you.”

I didn’t like how he could read me so easily without even seeing my face.

“I’m sorry,” he said.

I backed into a corner of the cell. There was no pallet, only a bucket. It comforted me to think that he had nothing more than I did here. He, too, would have to relieve himself in a waste bucket and live with the stink.

Quietly, he said, “I am interested in honor. I just wish I weren’t.”

I did not care.

“Yes, the lady cared about her reputation. Yes, I stayed silent so that no one else would know about her and me. She led me to her bedroom, Nirrim. And then we were caught, and she was ashamed. Silent. I didn’t love her. But yes, it hurt me.”

I drew my arms around my knees. Surely he couldn’t be surprised that the woman was embarrassed. She was married. And if he had been thrown into prison for it, well, maybe he would learn that he, too, shouldn’t want what he couldn’t have.

“I know that prison is different for you than for me,” he said. “It was stupid of me to forget that, and act like that difference isn’t important. Please forgive me.”

The cold had spread through my body and had gone down to my bones. I missed my coat. I missed Raven. I thought of Annin and her hope for the bird, and what she would say if I told her what had happened. I thought of her sky-colored eyes widening, lighting up. I wished I were home. I wished I were safe. “I’m tired,” I said.

“Sleep, then.”

I shook my head, even though he couldn’t see. “The guards might come back.”

“They won’t.”

“Because they’ll check the roster for your name?” I said it with sarcasm.

“Yes,” he said simply.

“Who are you, that you think yourself so important?”

He was quiet. When he spoke, I thought he would remind me that if we were not in prison, I would be punished for speaking so rudely to an upper kith. But he said only, “I will wake you if they come back.”

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Go to sleep, Nirrim. I’ll stay awake. They won’t come back, and if they do they will do nothing to you. And I will wake you anyway, so that you’ll see that they will do nothing to you.”

“You will?”

“Yes.”

My mind didn’t believe him, but my body did, or at least it was so weary that it was already giving in to his promise. My head lowered to my folded arms. I dreamed, before I fell into true sleep, that I was still talking with Sid, but couldn’t hear what we were saying even as we said it.





12


I WOKE SUCKING IN AIR, choking on it. I sat up from the stone floor in terror.

“Nirrim?”

I heard a rustle from Sid’s cell and his steps as he approached his bars. The footfalls were light. They sounded as if they could be mine. He was likely close in size to me. I didn’t know why, but that thought soothed me.

“Are you all right?” he said.

“Yes.”

“Bad dream?”

I said, “I must have turned onto my side in my sleep.”

I heard a soft, tapping sound: maybe his fingers rippling against the bars. “And that gives you nightmares, to sleep on your side?”

It had been that way ever since I had woken up next to Helin’s body. “I try not to. Sometimes it happens anyway.”

I thought he might press me to answer his question—he was pushy—but said only, “I was wondering whether to wake you.”

“Did I talk in my sleep?”

“You did mention how attractive I am. How very handsome.”

“Liar.” I felt myself flush. “I can’t even see you.”

“Ah, but you know. Intuitively.” Then there was a shifting, impatient sound, and he said, “Ignore me, please. Sometimes I can’t help but tease, and you are very teasable. You said nothing. But you were … sad. The sounds you made.”

I folded my arms around my knees. I couldn’t remember the nightmare, but could guess at what it had been. Her cold cheek. Rigid flesh.

“Are you embarrassed?” he said. “Don’t be. Think of me as the perfect stranger. You can say anything, do as you please. We are not likely to meet again outside this prison.”

“Because you live beyond the wall and I live behind it.”

“I suppose, yes, that is true. Also, I plan to leave this island before long.”

“Really?”

“Don’t get me wrong. I like it here. The city is beautiful. Glittery. As if a god skimmed a great hand over the bright sea to collect its colored reflections of the sun, then tossed it over Ethin. And the parties! So decadent. I especially love this silver-pink wine that makes you tell your true desires. I don’t know what I like better: watching people drink it or drinking it myself.”

I had never heard of such a wine. Was he making this up? Not wanting to reveal my ignorance about life beyond the wall, I said, “You don’t seem like someone who has a problem saying what’s on your mind.”