The Memory Keeper of Kyiv (87)

Nick looked up at her, his mouth hanging open. “Are you okay?”

“I can’t do this, Nick.” Cassie’s voice cracked. “Don’t you see? She’s going to lose him. She’s lost everyone, and he’s going to die, too. Kolya wasn’t my grandfather!”

Hearing Bobby’s story hadn’t just brought up old feelings. It had ripped her out of this fantasy world she’d been living in. Henry’s death was the hardest thing she’d ever endured, and Cassie wasn’t as strong as Bobby. She couldn’t go through it again, couldn’t risk opening herself up, because losing another love would kill her. She was a fool to think taking off her wedding ring would magically make her ready for a new relationship.

She was broken. Damaged goods.

Cassie wrenched away from Nick’s touch and stood on shaky legs. “I think you should go.”

Confusion clouded Nick’s face. “Did I do something wrong?”

You did everything right. “No. It’s me. I can’t do this with you.”

“Do what? The journal?” He stood fast, his forehead knotted in confusion, and his chair skidded back across the floor.

“All of it.” Cassie bit the inside of her cheek. “The dating. The journal. I’m not ready for this, and I’m not sure I’ll ever be. You deserve better than some broken widow. I’m sorry, Nick. I’ll see if my mom will type the rest of this up with you, but I can’t hear it, and I can’t be with you.” She bolted out of the kitchen before he could change her mind.

“Cassie, wait!”

Nick’s voice trailed after her as she ducked into her room and closed the door on him.





A loud thump from one of the bedrooms startled Cassie out of her fitful sleep. She jumped out of bed and looked at the alarm clock. Six in the morning. Way too early for someone who tossed and turned until three. She ran into Birdie’s room. The little girl was sleeping peacefully, one arm thrown over her head and the other wrapped around a stuffed dog. Cassie pulled the door shut and knocked on Bobby’s door. When she got no answer, she pushed open the door and found Bobby on the floor, her eyes staring up at the ceiling. Short, shallow breaths wheezed through her lips.

“Bobby!” Cassie’s mind went blank. She fell to her knees and touched Bobby’s cool, clammy face. Bobby grabbed at Cassie’s hand, her eyes wide with fear.

“I’m here now, okay? I’ll get you help! Stay with me!” Cassie snatched the phone off the nightstand and dialed 911 with fumbling fingers. After giving them the information, she called her mom.

“I’m on my way!” Anna snapped into the phone.

“You should go straight to the hospital. You’ll get there quicker, and you can meet the ambulance.” Cassie’s hand rhythmically squeezed Bobby’s as she talked. “They should be here in two minutes.”

“I’ll come get you first. I don’t want you driving when you’re upset like this.”

“I’ll be okay,” Cassie lied. Her body shook uncontrollably, and she still hadn’t decided how she would shield Birdie from seeing Bobby like this. She hoped the little girl didn’t wake up now and walk in on them.

The doorbell sounded, and she jumped up.

“They’re here. I’ve got to go!” Cassie dropped the phone and hurried to the front door.

Two paramedics barreled into the house. As Cassie directed them toward Bobby’s room, Nick, hair mussed like he’d just rolled out of bed, ran in the door.

She threw her arms around him in a fierce hug, her need for comfort in this moment outweighing any of the things she’d told him the night before.

“I had my radio on my nightstand. When I heard the address, I came right over.” He pressed his cheek against her hair as he held her close.

“Thank you.” Her voice broke.

“Cassie”—he pulled back and gripped her shoulders—”where’s Birdie?”

“She’s still sleeping,” Cassie replied, focusing on Nick’s face. His calm eyes stared back into hers and the racing thoughts in her mind slowed. She wrung her hands. “I don’t want her to see Bobby like this.”

“Do you want to go to her room and stay with her? I’ll help Bobby get in the ambulance, then drive you both to the hospital.”

Cassie let his soothing voice roll over her, and she nodded mutely.

Nick glanced past her. “All right. They’re coming out with her now. Go on into Birdie’s room so she doesn’t walk out.”

Cassie, afraid to break contact with Nick’s steady presence, faltered for a moment as he nudged her down the hall and went in to talk to the other medics. She pulled herself together and tiptoed into Birdie’s room. Somehow, the girl slept on through all the commotion.

“Birdie.” Cassie shook the small shoulder. “Birdie, it’s time to wake up. Nick’s here, and he’s going to take us to the hospital. Maybe he’ll take you to the park while I go talk with Bobby and her doctor.”

At the sound of Nick’s name, the little girl’s eyes flew open. “Nick’s here?” She jumped out of bed and ran to her toy table. “I’m going to bring a bag with crayons and books, okay, Mommy?”

“That’s a great idea.” Cassie moved to stand near the door. As the medics carried Bobby out the front door on a stretcher, she clamped a hand over her mouth to hold back her cry.