The Lone Wolf's Rejected Mate (Five Packs #3)(38)

“I can’t believe Killian let you walk over here in the dark.”

She snorts, scans the shadows, and nods at the trees in our side yard. I can just make out the huge silver wolf, sitting under an elm, grooming his coat as he keeps an eye on Una and the pup.

I can’t help but smile. The biggest wolf in the five packs, if what they say about Rosie Collins is an exaggeration, and he’s completely tamed.

“I mean it, Mari.”

“I know, but there’s really nothing to say.” I cross over to her and reach out to run the tip of a finger over the impossibly soft back of Raff’s balled fist. “He’s lost in dream land, isn’t he?” I say, praying she lets me change the subject. My eyes are prickling, and I don’t want to lose it—I have a date tomorrow. I am moving forward. I don’t need a big sister to lean on. I need to turn a new page.

For a second, Una searches my face, but then, thankfully, she chuckles. “Oh yeah. He’ll be out like a light until the second I get my own butt into bed. Then it’s party time.”

We chat another minute or two before Killian’s wolf pads over and stares at Una expectantly. She rolls her eyes, but she lets him act like a banister to help her descend the stairs, and as they walk home, side by side, she rests a hand on his shiny coat.

My heart pings, and I ignore it. I go inside, lock the door, say goodnight to Kennedy, and go to bed.

I lie in bed a long time, arms folded under my head, my nightgown riding up. The fresh night air from the cracked window feels delicious on my moisturized skin. Of their own accord, my fingers trace the faint silvery white scar that runs from my top rib toward my belly button. I probably would have healed without a scratch if I’d let Una or Annie stitch me up. In retrospect, I did a real shit job.

I don’t mind the scar, though. Touching it anchors me. It’s proof that no matter what dark thoughts I have in the wee hours of the night, I’m lucky. I got away. And I’m strong. I patched myself up.

I settle into the mattress and try to untangle my jumbled feelings so sleep will come. I’m nervous and scared and bitter and hopeful. I focus on my breathing, careful to keep the bond blanked out. I’m an expert at ignoring its existence. It was hard at first, especially when Darragh dropped by camp and it would light up like a flashing neon arrow, but I learned how to look past it, to listen without hearing, feel without acknowledging.

I sigh. I don’t want to think about Darragh now. I don’t owe him anything. If he wanted to talk it out, he’s had four years, and the closest he’s come is today, and he wanted to tell me how to cook a bird.

On the nightstand, my phone buzzes. I check it. It’s Lenox.

i can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

My belly does a weird flip. I’m excited. It’s nice. I text him back.

me too.

And then I settle back to stare at my stark white walls.

Maybe it’s time to put fairy lights up again.

After the incident with Darragh’s wolf, I packed up my girly princess shit and left it on the free table in the back of the commissary. Someone took all three boxes by the next time I checked. Probably a dam with a little girl. She must have thought she hit the jackpot. It makes me happy to think so, to imagine a little girl decorating her room like a princess’s turret.

It makes me sad, too, but I don’t dwell on it.

My phone buzzes again. I roll over to my side to check it.

you aren’t gonna ghost me, are you?

Oh, he’s nervous. That’s so cute. He’s a really confident guy. It’s kind of nice knowing he’s a little uncertain, too.

no way. i hate ghosts.

He sends me a ghost emoji. I send him the barfing smiley face and go back to staring around my empty room.

Junking my stuff was my version of chopping off all my hair. At least I didn’t do that. I would’ve looked like a mess when it was growing out.

But maybe it’s time to invest in some décor again. I have money, and now that Una’s the alpha female, we don’t have to hide it anymore.

Yeah, new male, new space, new me.

That’s good.

The phone buzzes. Once again, my stomach does a strange somersault. Lenox has zero problem showing he’s interested, and I could totally get used to it.

are you coming alone?

I kind of wish I was, now, but I’m already bending enough rules.

i’m riding in with kennedy and annie, but they’re gonna go shopping.

He sends me a smiley face wearing sunglasses. I don’t reply. It’s kind of a thrill to leave him on read.

I snuggle under the covers and drift off designing a vision board in my mind, swapping out pinks for reds, creams for browns, geometric designs for flowers, imagining what tomorrow will be like, what Lenox will wear, what we’ll do after we drink coffee.

I don’t wonder why Darragh wanted to talk to me so bad or why he went to Killian afterwards. I don’t think about him at all.

My finger skims along my scar, and as my eyes grow impossibly heavy, the scent of sunshine at midnight drifts into my bedroom on a breeze, teasing my nose and unfurling the ball of nerves in my belly. My wolf calms, her twitching limbs still, and we both fall fast asleep.





6





DARRAGH





“Holy. Fucking. Fate. Is he ripping its spine out?” The young male that Killian brought with him whispers under his breath, but there’s nothing wrong with my ears.