The Lobotomist's Wife(77)

“So you’ve said. Frequently. I am not sure how many more times I can tell you that you need this before you believe me. I think you do believe me since you are here.” She felt like he was yelling at her. It made her extremely anxious.

“Perhaps you would like to see where the procedure is performed?” His voice and face softened. “Have a look at the instruments. I have a feeling it will help you to see how simple it all really is.”

That did seem like a reasonable idea. Maybe if she could visualize what lobotomy would look like, put herself in the moment, she could determine whether it was what she really wanted, what she needed. “All right.” She stood. “Why don’t I get Frank and he can see too? I think it will set his mind at ease.”

“We can show Frank once you make your decision.”

Margaret followed Dr. Apter into the small second room. It was a simple space with a reclining chair, a metal tray, and a machine of some sort that Dr. Apter immediately turned on. Margaret started to get more nervous as she heard the humming noise and saw the long metal instruments that would be thrust into her eyes—they really did look like ice picks. Dr. Apter lifted two cuplike pieces attached by flexible cables to the machine now whirring feverishly. She began to step back, toward the door of the room.

“Don’t be afraid. This is just a simple electroshock machine. It’s what I use instead of anesthesia. It’s very gentle, has a calming effect actually. Come, look.”

Margaret suddenly felt paralyzed with fear. She wanted to open her mouth and yell, but that would be absurd. This was her doctor. His job was to heal her. Steeling herself, she approached him slowly. As she did, he lunged for her with the electrodes in his hand, and only then did she let out a bloodcurdling scream.





Chapter Fifty


Frank shook the door by the knob but it wouldn’t open, so Ruth grabbed a rock and threw it through the glass panel. She reached inside to unlock the door, and the two of them rushed into the room in a frenzy.

“Maggie?” Frank screamed as he tore across the office to the second room.

“Robert?” Ruth was on Frank’s heels, panicked about what they might see when they went through that doorway. She braced herself, anticipating that she’d find Margaret in the chair with Robert standing over her, finishing up the lobotomy she never needed. She desperately hoped she was wrong.

“Mags? Mags?” She heard Frank almost whimper and then begin to bawl, and her heart broke. She entered the room to find Margaret on the floor in Frank’s arms, sobbing but untouched. “It’s okay, Mags, it’s okay.”

Robert lay next to them seemingly unconscious.

“He . . . he . . . he tried to knock me out. I wasn’t ready. I wanted to see the room and then tell you, for sure, that it was going to happen first. But he was like a wild animal coming at me. He had those things in his hands, he was going to shock me, to put me out so he could do it right then. I tried to push him away and he tripped backward on the wire. Hit his head. He fell to the ground . . . he . . .” Margaret started to cry harder. Ruth knelt down next to Robert and checked his pulse, still steady. She checked his head for signs of a cut and there were none.

“I’m sure he will be fine.” She stood and went to the kitchen to get Margaret a cool cloth and a glass of water. Ruth approached her tentatively, handing her the glass and giving the rag to Frank.

“What happened to your face?” Margaret looked at Ruth, taking a deep, jagged breath.

“It’s nothing.” Ruth smiled, though her lip throbbed.

“That bastard hit her, that’s what happened.”

“He hit you? Are you hurt?” Edward’s voice came from the doorway.

“Edward?” She shook her head. “No, I’m fine. But how are you . . . why are you . . . ?”

“I’ve been worried sick about you. You left an urgent message last night and I called and called, and no one answered. I had a feeling something was terribly wrong. I came as soon as I could.”

Ruth felt flooded with gratitude. “Thank you,” she said softly, wincing from the pain in her face as she smiled.

“Are you all right? You look terrible.”

“I will be.” Ruth nodded as she looked behind her to see Robert still unmoving on the floor, Frank and Margaret sitting in stunned silence beside him.

“Frank, Margaret, let’s get you out of here. Would you like to go up to the house to collect yourselves? You may stay as long as you need.”

“If it’s all the same to you”—Margaret pushed herself up to stand, holding tightly to Frank—“I’d just like to go home.”

“Let’s go.” Frank wrapped his arm around her protectively as they walked to the door.

“I am so sorry,” Ruth said to them both as she watched them leave. She wasn’t sure whether the tears streaming down her face were from guilt about what had almost happened to Margaret or relief that she had been spared. Whatever the cause, she allowed herself to succumb to them and let Edward wrap her in a comforting embrace.





Chapter Fifty-One


Ruth stood momentarily paralyzed, steadying herself against Edward’s solid frame. She took in this room, once the place of so much hope and, now, the scene of utter horror. It still made no sense. In the corner of her eye, she noticed a pile of shoeboxes next to Robert’s desk; she knew what she’d find inside. Her husband, ever the record keeper, had saved every letter, every Christmas card, every happy family photo from each and every patient he had treated. She knew he liked to take them out to look at them when he needed reassurance. She lifted the top one from the pile and began to read out loud to Edward: