The Lies I Told(39)

“She’s not fine,” I said.

“How can you tell?”

“I can.” I could recognize the tension building in my sister. The good part about Marisa being a drunk was that she’d been somewhat relaxed. The booze cushioned her reactions. But without it, each sober day sharpened the softness into jagged points.

“She’s come so far. She was near death in the hospital. She’s lucky to be alive.”

I’d met David in the emergency room at the Virginia Commonwealth University hospital. He’d been visiting a friend. I’d been pacing, trying to swallow the dregs of another coffee as I waited for the surgeon to appear and give me an update. David had come up to me with a packet of crackers and a bottle of water.

“You look like you can use this,” he said.

The burst of annoyance tempered when I looked up in his eyes. He seemed genuinely worried. “Do I know you?”

“David,” he said. “I have one of those faces.”

“I never forget a face.”

“We can play a guessing game if it’ll help,” he said.

I’d no energy to solve that little puzzle. “Not much for games tonight.”

“Are you waiting for someone?”

“Sister,” I said. “She’s in surgery.”

“I’m here for a friend. He was just brought in for a stroke.” He’d coaxed me into a chair, and the two of us had sat in silence. He was a stranger, and yet I felt closer to him than anyone at that moment.

When the doctors told me I could see Marisa, I thanked David and disappeared behind swinging doors. All my annoyance melted when I saw Marisa in her hospital bed. Her face was pale, her hair shorn, and there were endless tubes coming out of her body.

“She can fool you,” I said, more to myself, as David now hugged me closer.

“How?”

“She mentioned Detective Richards at last night’s dinner. She wasn’t going to see him this year, but she did.”

“It doesn’t hurt for her to talk to him. You said she’s been doing it for the last several years. It’s her way of feeling less powerless because she knows the case will never be solved.”

The windowpane caught his reflection. Our gazes met. “How do you know it won’t be solved?”

“It’s been thirteen years. You said yourself the river washed away the forensic data. There were no witnesses.”

“I’ve stopped trying to tell her that. She won’t listen. Jack called me tonight. She was asking him about Clare.”

“What did she ask him?”

“About the night Clare died. No new information, of course. Same old. It’s not good for her to stir up the past.”

“How so?”

“She’s always been obsessed with Clare’s death. For most of last year, she was focused on her sobriety. It was all going great. And then last December she started visiting the river. Taking pictures.”

“You said she had an art exhibit.”

“She did. I tried to talk her out of it. I thought it would be awkward. Embarrassing even. But I was so struck by the power of her images. She’s surprisingly very talented.”

“Let Marisa ask her questions. Let this run its course,” he said. “She’ll poke around and realize some puzzles just can’t be solved.”

I turned and faced him, tracing small circles in the center of his chest covered in a sprinkling of dark hair. “What if she doesn’t realize this is unsolvable? What if she spirals out of control?”

“I learned a long time ago not to borrow trouble. Life dishes up plenty without you heaping on extras.”

Life had sent more than one person’s fair share of suffering my way, and the way I saw it, there was no universal limit. We got what we got. To David’s credit he’d never doused me with platitudes. God won’t give you more than you can handle. It’ll make you stronger. All the bullshit that rolled off me like water off a duck.

David kissed me on the forehead, tenderly. He was like that. Gentle, loving. That was how our lovemaking always started. He’d coax me. Woo me. And only when he had me did his kisses and touches grow more urgent. He was passionate to the point of rough, but he never crossed the line.

“You’re right,” I said, smiling. “No more trouble tonight.”

“But you’re already worrying about tomorrow’s problems.” He nibbled my earlobe with his teeth.

“Marisa and I have a ten a.m. meeting tomorrow. I’m going over her books with her.”

As if I hadn’t spoken, he pushed the robe’s silk off my shoulder until the pale skin was exposed. He kissed me first at the base of my neck and then above my breast. Then he suckled my nipple before nibbling with his teeth. Up to the line of too much, before he backed off.

I liked the restrained violence. He could hurt me if he wanted to, but he didn’t out of respect. The fear and the worry that always focused my mind faded as my desire grew.

He ran his hand down my belly and to the nest of curls between my legs. When I gasped, looked up at him, he smiled. “Making sure you’re paying attention.”

“Full and undivided.” Times like this, I didn’t recognize my own voice.

Fingers slipped between the folds, and I arched as he pressed the nub. Energy shot to my loins, and he reached for the tie binding the robe. Silk slid off my body like a waterfall, pooling around my feet.