The Intern (The Dalton Family #4)(67)

“I’ve told you, I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to be a boyfriend. I don’t know how to give you all the things you need.” He looked down, the intensity fully exposed on his face. The lines deep in his forehead and the sides of his mouth. His knuckles white as he gripped the molding. He looked up as he added, “That doesn’t mean I don’t want to try.”

A wave shot across my chest, like a crack in a frozen lake, a web spidering across the entire surface. “What are you telling me, Declan?”

His fingers fastened a bit harder on my cheek. “I want us.”

Us.

In my eyes, those two letters were as powerful as the ones that spelled love.

Still, I wasn’t sure he knew the magnitude of what he was saying.

What this actually meant.

It was one thing to want me, but it was a whole different thing to want us.

“Do you know what you’re telling me?” I searched his eyes, digging, assessing like I’d done in this room only minutes ago, a loop starting all over again. “Because I know you’ve had a lot to drink tonight, and by the way you stared me down when I returned to our table, you weren’t happy I was talking to the cowboy, and I’m sure that has something to do with this.”

“This has nothing to do with the booze, Hannah. It’s long worn off. I’m dead sober.” His stare expanded, and I felt it the second it entered me. “It has nothing to do with the cowboy either.” He stepped closer, his other hand now on my face, tilting my chin upward. “I need you to hear me. I need you to understand this.”

When I nodded, his fingers didn’t move.

“Okay.”

His gaze lowered to my mouth and lifted to my eyes. A pattern. And during each dip, my mind spun to every place imaginable.

“I can’t promise I’m never going to hurt you. I can’t promise I’m going to be perfect. I can’t promise I’m going to know how to navigate this or that my decisions will always align with yours. I can’t promise you’re not going to hate me at times”—he lowered his mouth, pressing our noses together—“or that I won’t lose my patience, making you want to kill me.” As he pulled away a few inches, his thumb brushed my bottom lip. “But here’s what I can promise you. You’re going to get all of me. I’ll be honest with you even if the words I speak aren’t the ones you want to hear.”

His eyes closed, and when they slowly opened, a pang moved straight into my heart.

“I’m going to try like hell to be the man you need me to be, Hannah.”

“Why?” I swallowed, needing to make sure this was real. Needing to make sure I wasn’t dreaming. “Why now? Because this morning, on the plane, you said this wasn’t easy and you were deciding whether you were willing to risk it all to be with me.” The sting from that conversation was present in my eyes. “Do you understand how confusing this is when you go from cold to hot—”

“This morning, I was being an asshole. I was being selfish. I was avoiding what I knew I needed to do because I didn’t know how to do it.” He exhaled. “I shouldn’t have acted that way. You didn’t deserve that, and I’m sorry.”

“That doesn’t change what you said and what you meant.”

His eyes dropped from mine for only a second, and I knew he was so far outside his comfort zone, this discussion so unlike anything he normally had.

“You’re right; it doesn’t. But for what it’s worth, my feelings for you this morning were as strong as they are now.”

I wanted to get to the bottom of this, so I said, “Something’s changed. What was it?”

He shifted, and the brief movement sent me his cologne. “While you were at the bar with the cowboy, I was talking to Walter and Jenner about you.”

“Really?”

His expression softened. “Walter saw right through me. He immediately knew I had feelings for you, which came as a surprise to Jenner. What I learned from that chat was that Jenner had gone through the same thing with Jo. Jenner didn’t want to tell Walter that he was in love with his daughter, the same way I haven’t wanted to tell my bosses and friends how I feel about you.”

My lip started to tremble, and I pulled it into my mouth.

Is this really happening?

“The job, I can replace,” he continued. “The friendships, those will be much harder, if it even comes to that, but I won’t let that stop me.” His thumb stroked my cheek. “I can’t lose you, Hannah. Everywhere I turn, someone is trying to steal you. If I wait any longer, you’ll be gone forever.” He brought our faces closer. “I’m not going to let that happen.”

A tingling moved through my body. Not the kind I was used to when it came to Declan. This was more of a warmth that reminded me of campfires and the glow from a sunset. The feeling increased as I took in more of his eyes.

“You’re choosing us …” The admission came out of me softly, my heart catching up, as though it were a step behind my voice.

Because even though I was witnessing this moment, I was present for it, I still couldn’t believe it was happening. I hadn’t been sure if Declan was ever going to come around, if he was capable of giving me what I wanted.

But he stood in this doorway, not even inside my room, like he hadn’t been able to wait to get this out, and he was speaking the words I’d dreamed of hearing.