The Horsewoman(73)

I made a sharp, clean turn coming into the rollback, my brain telling me not to take chances here, to go outside, I was in complete command as long as I didn’t make a mistake. Outside was the safer route. My brain practically screaming at me to go outside.

But I was riding to win.

Screw it.

Went inside.

Nailed it.

Three jumps left.

Gave Sky perfect distances on the first two.

One more.

I could taste it now.

Then got Sky too close to the last jump.

Not by very much. Maybe half a stride off. But that was all it took sometimes to mean the difference between triumph and disaster.

Sky raised up just fine, did the best she could in that last second. It was when she was coming down that I heard the solid thwack—worst sound in the world for a show jumper—as she caught the top rail of the oxer with one of her hind legs.

No!

But it stayed up. The sucker stayed up. The cheer hit me then, a huge cheer that seemed to come from all directions. No jump-off. Just a first-place ribbon and trophy and another bottle of champagne.

And a ton of money and points.

We’d won the goddamn World Cup. Even Gus Bennett allowed himself to look happy as we came toward him from the last jump. I looked over my shoulder briefly, just to make sure the rail on the last oxer was still up there.

“That,” he said, “is what I am talking about.”

Only now was the crowd noise beginning to subside, and the force of that last moment when I was clean. I took one last look around, at the course and the crowd, the whole ring. It all looked sweet.

It was then that I heard a loud voice coming from the box seats above me and knew right away it was Mom’s.

I brought Sky to a stop.

When I looked up, I realized that Mom wasn’t yelling for me, or to get my attention.

She was standing next to Daniel, but really seemed to be yelling at herself.

“This is my own damn fault!” she said.





NINETY-ONE

Daniel



DANIEL COULD SEE PEOPLE in the immediate area looking at them.

“I know you’re upset,” Daniel said. “But your daughter just won.”

“I’ll tell her I’m happy for her later,” Maggie said. “But right now I’m allowed to be unhappy with myself.”

He had seen her lose before, knew how she reacted, the way she would vent when it was just the two of them alone afterward. Today was different. Today she was completely defeated.

“I know you don’t think this right now,” he said. “But you keep telling me that part of your dream is for both you and Becky to make the Olympic team.”

“She got closer today,” Maggie said. “I got further away.”

“You’re still going to make it,” he said.

“Not riding like this,” she said.

The section of expensive seats next to them, one of the luxury boxes, was already empty. Daniel eased Maggie in that direction. In the middle of the ring, he could see them setting up for the awards presentation. Becky was down with Jennifer Gates, who had finished third, and Matthew Killeen, who’d finished second. Even from here, Daniel could see that Becky was beaming, looking to him as if she might float away.

He felt himself smiling as he watched her, as excited for her in that moment as he could possibly be. He always wanted Maggie to win, of course. Just not as much as he wanted Becky to win. He wanted so badly to be with her. But knew it was better that she was down there and he was up here.

Maggie sat down. Daniel sat down next to her.

“Would you like something to drink?” he said. “You have not had anything since you finished your round.”

“Got a bottle of vodka handy?”

She put her head back and closed her eyes and seemed to be talking to herself.

“If they had to pick the team today, I’m out,” she said. She chuckled. “Ironic, isn’t it? I took my horse back and she just passed me on hers.”

“But that is the thing,” he said. “They are not picking the team today. And you know better than anyone that there are more factors than just the final standings.”

“Not if you’re riding like crap at the worst possible time.”

“So many of you are all just bunched together,” he said. “First place down to sixth. And they all know your record before you got hurt. And if the Olympics had been last summer, you would have gone.”

“These people have short memories!” Maggie said. “You think they didn’t see what Becky just did?”

He was choosing his words carefully, as carefully as he ever had around her, not wanting to make her feel worse than she already did. Not wanting to make a bad day for her get any worse.

“It is not just her that you have to beat,” Daniel said.

“But she is the one to beat right now!” Maggie said, the words rising out of her so hot they made Daniel think of steam.

Down in the ring they had set up the medal stand. A woman from FEI was placing Becky’s ribbon around her neck, and then another woman stepped forward to hand her a bottle of champagne. When it was time for her to receive her trophy, Becky motioned for Gus to wheel his way out and Becky handed the trophy to him.

Maggie must have been watching Daniel watch Becky. In a quiet voice now she said, “Whose side are you on, Daniel? Really?”