The Hidden (Shadowed Wings #1)(18)

“You useless fucking pigeon,” I shout at my gryphon, turning my rage on her. “I wish you were a wolf instead of a rotisserie chicken, you worthless buffalo wing!” I jibe, hoping for some kind of response. Any kind of response, but nothing stirs inside of me.

Ryn’s eyes widen with surprise as I turn my impotent rage on my animal instead of them, cursing her and threatening her. I even fucking try bribery, but nothing. I feel fucking nothing inside where she should clearly be.

As a teenager, I had to come to terms with being latent when I realized I couldn’t shift, but I always felt what I thought was a wolf inside of me. The connection with my animal was there even if I couldn’t unlock her. I had the heightened smell and hearing, the strength and dominance. I always felt her. But now I’ve shifted into some winged fucking monster, and suddenly I’m empty inside. If this whole being held captive thing isn’t enough to scare the shit out of me, the loneliness I now feel in my chest trumps that fear a million fold.

Where are you?

I plead with my gryphon, but it’s met with stillness and silence inside of me, my desperation clearly not enough to make anything happen. The bitch has abandoned me, and I hate her for it.





7





I give up and go still in Zeph’s hold. I pant through my desolation and meet Ryn’s gaze with defeat in my eyes. He almost looks sorry.

“If you’re done now, I’ll just scrub you, and then we’ll ask some questions,” he tells me, his tone a little softer, and I don’t bother to wipe at the tear that streaks down my cheek. Another follows in its tracks, unchecked, and I look away from him and stare out into the darkening forest.

I don’t say or do anything as Ryn scrubs my face, neck and shoulders with soft moss that smells like hopelessness. I don’t fight Zeph as he loosens his hold and lifts my arms or when he spins me around so that Ryn can scrub my back when he’s done with the front of me. I don’t look at Zeph. Don’t give him a peek of the desolation coursing through my every cell, but I can feel his honey gaze on me the whole time. They say nothing as they scrub me down quickly and efficiently, and the silence constricts around us even tighter as no one says or does anything for a minute after it’s clear Ryn is done.

Zeph slowly spins me around, my back against his chest again. “What is your name?” he asks me eventually, his deep tone snaking its way unwelcomingly through me and leaving warmth in its wake.

“Falon Solei Umbra,” I answer robotically.

“And where are you from?” Ryn presses.

“Colorado. That’s a state in the USA which is located on the North American continent,” I repeat.

“Are you Avowed?” Zeph grumbles out.

I blink away another tear. “I don’t think so, but I don’t exactly know what that is, so I can’t say for sure.”

“Are you mated?” Zeph asks me, and something about his tone or the question makes me snap out of my cyborg impression.

“No,” I growl out, meeting Ryn’s eyes in front of me with pure rage.

“What were you doing flying through the Amaranthine Mountains?” Zeph demands.

“I don’t know,” I admit. “I was trying to spread my grandmother’s ashes, but all of a sudden, I felt like I’d been hit by lightning. The next thing I know, I had wings, and you were attacking me,” I accuse and look up over my shoulder at him. I’m pressed too closely against him, and all I can make out is his five-o’clock-shadow-dusted chin.

“What do you know of Lazza?” Ryn asks me, and I pull my irritated glare from Zeph’s chin and rest it back on Ryn’s gray eyes.

“I don’t know who that is. I’ve only heard the name once before when he mentioned it,” I say, gesturing with my head to indicate Zeph behind me.

“What about Vedan or Kestrel City? The Ouphe?” Ryn presses.

I shrug. “No idea what any of that means.”

Ryn and Zeph exchange a confused look and an incredulous laugh escapes me. “You were so convinced that I was lying, but I wasn’t. I told you assholes the truth the first time you asked me for it! Stupid pricks,” I sling at them and push out of Zeph’s hold. “Get the fuck off me,” I snap at him, and I’m surprised when he actually lets me go. I swim away from them toward the edge of the pool and then turn around, leaving the rocky edge to protect my back.

“Can I fucking go home now?” I demand, completely fed up with everything that’s happened from the minute I woke up in this strange place.

“No,” Ryn answers, and my stare snaps to his in surprise. He looks about as shocked as I do.

“Why not?” I question.

“Because you belong to us now,” he tells me, and then he slaps a hand over his mouth.

“Wait. What?”

“What he means is we don’t know how to get you home. There are old stories of gates that the Ouphe used to pass to different places, but the knowledge of how to use them died when they did. We don’t know how you got here,” Zeph tells me, stepping in front of Ryn.

“Is that true?” I ask, looking past Zeph and focusing on Ryn.

“Yes,” he tells me, and an emphatic nod punctuates the word.

“Can you figure it out?” I press. “I have a job and a life.” I open my mouth to try and say that I want to go home, but nothing comes out. I furrow my brow in confusion and look to Zeph and Ryn for help.