The Friends We Keep(87)
“Dog. Country dog. Good hunters. It would accessorize that outfit perfectly.”
His face lit up. “We actually should get a dog.”
Evvie walked into the room. “Dog? Did someone say something about getting a dog? Can we be trusted with a dog?” asked Evvie. “Remember Colin the cat?”
“Colin the cat!” Maggie broke into peals of laughter. “I haven’t even thought about Colin the cat for about a hundred years. What ever happened to him?”
“He went missing. That’s the point. Maybe we’re not responsible animal owners, although I have always wanted a dog. Mind you, if Colin could have talked, I bet he would have told people not to let us have animals.”
“I disagree,” said Topher, reaching over and taking a bite out of one of Maggie’s slices of toast.
“Hey,” she said, “make your own.” Nobody had eaten her food since she was married. She remembered how Ben always had terrible food envy. Whenever they went out to eat, their food would arrive and Ben always wanted what Maggie had. He always reached over to take the first bite off her plate, and would have done exactly what Topher just did, reached over and helped himself. And she hated it. She would shout at Ben all the time for doing what Topher just did, but it didn’t bother her in the slightest when Topher did it, even though she pretended it did. If anything, these small acts helped foster the intimacy they all once had.
“I don’t want my own,” groaned Topher. “Other people’s food always tastes better. The point being, Colin the cat hated us. He hated me, at any rate. He never wanted anyone to touch him. Whose idea was it anyway to rescue a cat?”
“We didn’t rescue him,” said Evvie. “If I remember correctly, Colin attached himself to Maggie.”
Maggie shrugged. “I remember him being lovely. We had dogs here years ago. I love the idea of a dog but what if . . .” She stopped. What if it all went wrong? was what she was going to say. Could she be the only one who was even thinking that? Everyone else seemed blissfully happy, and it wasn’t that she wasn’t, but that she still couldn’t quite believe this was going to be permanent. The last month or so had felt like an extended holiday, without the sand and sea. And sun. And someone else making the beds every day. Obviously.
It still felt temporary to her, as if one day she would wake up and everyone would decide to go back to their normal lives, their real lives, and the house would settle back to sleep under a blanket of quiet.
“What if this doesn’t work out?” Topher finished Maggie’s sentence for her as she shrugged, apologizing for voicing a thought she felt guilty for thinking. “I’ve thought about that too. I guess if it doesn’t work out, we move on and figure out our lives. I guess this is bigger for me, and Evvie maybe, because we moved from the States, but I needed a change. That is, Dickie had already decided to let me go. And with my mother here, I would probably have come over anyway. If it doesn’t work out, we’re all grown-ups, we’ll figure it out.”
“I hate even hearing you talk about it not working out.” Evvie’s mouth was downturned. “Of course we’d figure it out, but it’s been so amazing, living with other people. I had no idea how lonely I was.”
“Me too.” Maggie nodded.
“I have no idea what I would do. I’m sure I would be fine, but I honestly don’t know if I’d stay in England or go back to America. Maybe I’d go to California to be near Jack. But I hope this does work out. Are you having doubts, Maggie?”
“Not doubts. I love every second of it. Apart from cereal bowls and mugs being left in the sink late at night.” She gave them both a pointed look.
“That’s me,” Topher confessed, wincing. “I’m sorry. I’ll try to do better.”
“Can you also refill the cereal jar?”
“Yes. Of course. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I’m used to a housekeeper doing all that stuff.”
“You did not just say that!” Evvie’s mouth dropped open.
“Say what?” he said innocently. “What? It wasn’t me, I’m not spoiled. It was Dickie. Oh, okay. So I became spoiled. I’m having to retrain myself, okay? I made my bed this morning.”
“Well done,” said Evvie, but her eyes were twinkling.
“Sorry.” Topher looked at Maggie. “You were saying?”
“I was saying that I love it, but I suppose I’m so used to this house being quiet, to me rattling around in it by myself, I kind of feel like it’s all going to end and everyone will go back to their lives, leaving me by myself again.”
Topher nodded, musing. “I get it,” he said. “In some ways it must be hardest for you because this house is your home. It’s where you lived with Ben. It must be filled with memories, and it’s also yours. It’s not a place you can easily share. It probably would be easiest if we all bought something together, started on an equal footing.”
“We could still do that,” said Evvie. “Not that I don’t love it here, but we’re not tied to anything. Now that we’re renting from you, we could always look for something else and start again. If it doesn’t work out, of course, which I am sure it will.”
“Are you?” Topher looked at her. “You look doubtful.”