The Forgetting(2)

The man looks at me with mournful eyes, breathes deeply before replying. ‘It’s me, Anna. I’m your husband.’

I stare at the face of the man leaning over me – the lines around his eyes, the thick eyebrows, the firm slant of his nose – and panic tightens its grip around my throat.

I have no recollection of ever seeing him before.





LIVVY


BRISTOL

‘Happy Birthday dear Bea-ee,

Happy Birthday to you! ’

Livvy looked around the gastropub table at a dozen of her sister’s closest friends, Bea sitting at the head, basking in the attention.

A hand rested gently on the nape of Livvy’s neck, and she turned, found Dominic leaning towards her. He whispered in her ear. ‘You look beautiful. You should wear your hair up more often. It really suits you.’ He kissed her, just above her collarbone, his breath warm against her skin.

‘Honestly, you two. Most couples forget how to be affectionate the moment they have kids. You’re still like a pair of newly-weds. It’s very cute.’ Bea’s oldest school friend, Sara, smiled at them.

‘What can I say? I’m a very lucky man.’ Dominic stretched an arm across the back of Livvy’s chair, rested his hand on her shoulder. ‘Livvy’s my rock, my soulmate and my conscience all rolled into one.’

‘Stop! You’re making me blush.’

‘Take the compliment, Livvy.’ Sara thanked the waiter as he removed her plate. ‘It’s rare to see people our age as loved up as you two. It’s a good reminder to the rest of us not to get too complacent.’

Livvy turned to look at Dominic, thought about how much her life had changed in the past eighteen months.

Almost two years ago, she had sat on the sofa in Bea’s flat, grieving the end of her previous relationship. For five years she had been convinced that she and Tom would one day get married, have children, grow old together. But then Tom had announced his desire for them both to give up work, go travelling overseas indefinitely, and when Livvy had told him she wasn’t keen – she loved her job and didn’t want to derail her career – Tom had accused her of being unadventurous, had said he’d never seen a long-term future for them anyway. He’d moved out within days, and Livvy had been left with the fear that she might never – having turned thirty-seven earlier that year – get married or have children.

Three months later, she had been attending a conference on sustainable construction, representing the environmental think tank where she worked, when a man – tall, silver streaks in his hair, a slightly weather-beaten face – had struck up a conversation with her. His name was Dominic, he was a structural engineer, and over the course of the weekend he had repeatedly stopped to engage her in conversation.

On the final evening of the conference, he had sought her out, asked if she’d like to have dinner with him the following week. Their first date had been at a Michelin-starred tapas restaurant, Dominic having remembered Livvy mentioning her love of Spanish food.

Everything with Dominic had been uncomplicated from the outset. There had never been any fears about whether he was going to call, whether or not she would see him again. He had worn his heart on his sleeve, made it abundantly clear how much he liked her. His attentiveness was unlike anything she’d experienced before. He’d listened intently to everything she’d had to say and asked questions in order to hear her opinions, not – like so many other men she knew – so that he could glaze over until it was his turn to speak again. His genuine interest in her thoughts and feelings had been almost revelatory.

By their third date, they had begun to confide in one another with an intimacy that belied the length of their acquaintance. Dominic was charming, funny and emotionally honest, and the ten-year age gap between them was barely noticeable.

But discovering she was pregnant twelve weeks into their relationship had not been part of the plan. It had been Bea to whom Livvy had first turned, arriving at her flat one morning, panic-stricken and bleary-eyed. And it had been Bea who had advised caution. ‘I know you’ve always wanted a child, but is this really the best way? Do you really want to tie yourself for the rest of your life to a man you hardly know? You could be co-parenting with him for the next eighteen years. That seems like a pretty big risk given you’ve only known him a few months.’

That evening, Livvy had arrived at Dominic’s two-bedroom Georgian house in Clifton, mouth dry, hands shaking, and delivered the news, fearing rejection. Instead, Dominic had wrapped his arms around her, reminded her that he loved her, and asked her to marry him.

Now, just over a year later, and with a six-month-old son, Livvy sometimes felt that she had packed more into the past eighteen months of her life than the previous eighteen years.

‘Bea mentioned that you’re going to be working away for a while, Dominic. How are you both going to manage that with a young baby?’

Dominic shrugged. ‘It’s not ideal, obviously, and I’m going to miss them both. But it’s not forever. And we’ll still have weekends together.’ Dominic’s smile was wide, encouraging, and Livvy tried not to think about the fact that tomorrow, Dominic would begin a new job that would take him away from her and Leo every week for the next four months.

‘I’m sure it’ll be fine. As you say, it’s only temporary, and you’re such a solid couple.’ Sara took the napkin from her lap and laid it on the table. ‘And Leo’s still so young, he’ll be fine.’