The Couple at No. 9(85)

‘You need to let me in.’

‘I don’t want to speak to you. Was it you who sent the police over? I might have guessed. Always so suspicious.’ He’s about to shut the door in Theo’s face, but Theo sticks his foot in the crack before he has the chance.

‘Actually, it wasn’t me. And if you let me in then I can explain,’ says Theo, trying to sound more forceful than he actually feels.

His dad stares pointedly at Theo’s trainer wedged in the door. ‘Doesn’t look like I have a choice,’ he says, stepping backwards. He turns on his heel and walks stiffly down the hall. Theo follows him into the kitchen. It’s immaculate as always. Not one thing out of place. His dad stands at the counter in the corner and switches the kettle on. ‘Be quick. I’m due at the club.’

Theo wonders, in that moment, if his dad has the capacity to love. He can’t imagine ever talking to his own child in the way his father speaks to him.

‘What did the police say?’

‘Nothing much. Just asked me a few questions.’

‘What about?’

He doesn’t say anything, just stands there blinking at Theo.

‘I know about Rose Grey. I know that she has a daughter – who is possibly my sister.’

He continues to stare at Theo coldly.

‘I know that you have that thug Davies threatening the family. Threatening your own daughter, for fuck’s sake. What is wrong with you?’

His dad looks taken aback. Theo has never sworn at his father before. And the good boy inside him, the kid that always aims to please, flinches as he says it.

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about. You are so like your mother. Letting your emotions run away with you.’

‘At least I have some, unlike you.’

‘I loved your mother. And I loved Rose,’ he replies. Theo wants to laugh. He’s sure his dad doesn’t know what love is. He’s confusing possession with love.

‘So, who was Rose to you?’

‘She was … someone I once had a relationship with.’ His dad’s eyes flicker, and Theo gets the impression he’s not telling the truth.

‘And what happened?’

‘She was living with me and left when she was pregnant. I tried to find her, but it wasn’t so easy back then. No mobile phones, no tracking, no internet. She just … disappeared off the face of the earth. And then I met your mother and Rose seemed less important.’

‘And your daughter?’

‘I wasn’t even sure if Rose had had the baby. She was around your age when I met her. She’d been around. She was only six months pregnant when she left me. And she was so … flighty.’

This doesn’t tie up with what Lorna said about her mother. ‘Are you saying you didn’t think the baby was yours? Well, I’ve got news for you, Dad. She is. The resemblance to both you and me is unmistakable. Is she who you were trying to find? Is that why you had that article on your desk, or is there more you’re hiding from me?’

His dad puts a hand to his head looking pained and, in that moment, less like the authoritarian control-freak Theo was always scared of and more like an old man. ‘It’s complicated. I asked Glen to look into it for me.’

He says this as though he’s discussing something as anodyne as the weather.

‘What does Glen actually do? He made out he’s a private detective but that’s bull-shit, isn’t it? Is he just a conman? I don’t know what the police said to you earlier, but if you’re linked with him it won’t be good for you.’

‘Don’t be ridiculous.’ He turns away from Theo to make tea. But something doesn’t sit right about all of this: his dad’s responses are purposefully evasive.

‘What about the evidence?’ asks Theo.

His dad doesn’t say anything but Theo notices a stiffening of his shoulders. A hesitation as he dunks a teabag. ‘Evidence?’

He’s playing for time, Theo can tell. ‘Yes. Apparently, when your henchman accosted Lorna – your own daughter – in the street,’ he spits this sentence out, hoping his father will hear the disgust in his voice, ‘he said something about Rose burying some evidence. What did he mean?’

His dad still has his back to Theo. ‘I have no idea,’ he says but Theo can hear the lie in his voice.

‘And then Davies broke into the cottage. Nothing was taken, funny that. But he was obviously looking for something.’

His dad turns to face him and hands him a mug. ‘I know nothing about that.’

‘Of course you do,’ says Theo, taking the tea. ‘Davies never does anything unless you say so. Is this what you were like with the police? They’ll see through it, Dad. You’re tied with Glen now.’

His dad regards him over the mug. It’s one Theo bought him for Father’s Day with a golfer on the front mid-swing. Theo detects a flicker of something in his father’s eyes: guilt, perhaps? Remorse? Fear? He’s not sure. He’s always been so hard to read. So closed.

Theo sips his tea. His dad is still intimidating, he realizes, as he watches him. But he’s a pensioner now. He can no longer hurt Theo. He has no control over Theo’s life. Theo is totally self-sufficient: he has never expected anything from his father. The things he did for him, they were born out of a sense of duty, and love for his mother. It was always drilled into him as a kid to love and respect his father – but it should work both ways. He felt he should love his dad when he was growing up so never questioned it. But now, if he’s really honest with himself, he has no such feelings for him. He swallows his tea. ‘And those photos of the women you had in your study?’