The Best Is Yet to Come (44)

After an embarrassing silence, she whispered, “I know what you mean.” She didn’t elaborate and was grateful Cade didn’t pry. She had things in her life she wasn’t comfortable enough to share. He probably did, too.

A short comfortable silence followed before Cade spoke again. “I’m a disappointment to a lot of people,” Cade said suddenly. “Harry and the others have helped me realize how far I have yet to go.”

Hope guessed Cade was talking about his relationship with his family and knew it weighed heavily on his mind. “You aren’t a disappointment to me,” she said, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. “The fact is, I think you’re wonderful. I want you to know how much your friendship has helped me.”

Her words appeared to shake him. It seemed he didn’t know how to respond. After a few moments, he said pensively, “I didn’t ever think…”

“Think what?” she pressed.

“That I would meet someone like you.”

Unsure what he meant, she asked. “Like me?”

“Someone so good.”

Unable to stop herself, Hope laughed. “I’m not that good, Cade. Please, whatever you do, don’t put me on a pedestal. I’m as flawed as anyone.”

His face shone with doubt in the moonlight. “I guess what I’m trying to say is, I didn’t expect to meet someone this accepting of me and my…problems.”

“If you’re talking about your leg…”

“It’s more than my leg. It’s my head. I’m struggling, looking to find where I belong. To fit back into life, to escape the nightmares that haunt me from my time in Afghanistan.” He paused, as if carefully measuring his words. “I’d gotten comfortable in the black hole I’d dug myself into.”

“I know what it’s like to be in a dark place myself,” she whispered. Seeing that Cade had shared this painful part of himself, Hope knew she needed to tell him about her twin brother.

A couple times since they’d started seeing each other, Cade had brought up Hunter. Hope had cleverly managed to sidestep his questions, and he seemed comfortable with that. Hope assumed it was because he feared she might ask him questions about his own service. She felt it would be better to leave any such discussion at his discretion.

“When I moved here, I was looking for a geographical cure,” she admitted. “I thought a fresh start would help.”

“From a broken heart?” he asked, and seemed to think the pain she carried was over the loss of a man she’d once loved.

“No…this has to do with my brother.”

“Hunter? What’s going on with him? Is he okay?”

Her throat clogged with emotion. “No, he’s not okay.”

Although it was awkward in his truck and a bit uncomfortable, Cade wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“Hunter…” She stopped and bit her lower lip, hardly able to mention her twin’s name without the instant rush of loss and grief.

“Tell me,” he whispered, as if he was willing to help her carry any burden, any weight too much for her to bear.

A sob broke loose.

“Hope, what happened to Hunter?”

“He’s gone, Cade. He’s the reason I left California. He died in Afghanistan nearly two years ago. I thought if I moved away, if I wasn’t constantly bombarded with memories, that I’d be able to move forward. That hasn’t happened. Every day is a struggle. I can’t let go of him for fear if I do, I’ll be left completely alone, floundering. I have no family. No one.”

His arms tightened, and he buried his face on the top of her head. “Oh baby, I’m so sorry. You aren’t alone any longer. I’m here and I’m not going anywhere.”

His words washed over her, giving her a reason to look forward instead of back to all she’d lost. She wept, comforted in the warmth of his embrace, absorbing his tenderness and his gentle care.

“We’ve both suffered losses,” Cade whispered, calming her by stroking his hand across her back in a soothing caress.

How long they sat there, in silence, holding on to each other, Hope couldn’t say. When she yawned, Cade said, “It’s time for me to leave.”

Although she didn’t want him to go, she knew it was for the best. For him and for her. Ever the gentleman, Cade walked her to the door. Shadow had been sitting on the porch, patiently waiting for her. Cade paused long enough to give him an affectionate pet.

Before she went inside, Cade gathered her in his arms and kissed her. This wasn’t the first time they’d exchanged kisses. But it felt different. Somehow sharing the pain of the losses in their lives had broken down unseen barriers between them. They clung to each other as Cade kissed the tears from her cheeks. Hope found it difficult to let him go.

“I hate to leave you,” he whispered, seeming as resistant for their evening to end as she was.

“I know.”

She went into the house with Shadow at her side, and then stood in the doorway with her arms around her waist, as she watched Cade return to his truck and drive away.



* * *



—

The next morning, Hope woke to a text message from Cade that left her smiling.

No nightmares for me. I dreamed of you instead. I’ve got a counseling session this afternoon. What time will you be free from school?