The Allure of Julian Lefray (The Allure #1)(60)

He took the hint and moved his hand away, brushing my skin with the pads of his fingers in the process. My stomach dipped at the loss of his touch, but there was nothing I could do. I’d pushed him away and now I had to live with my decision. I had a few moments to gather myself before the driver pulled over in front of our next destination. He hopped out of the front seat and rounded the car to open my door. I took a breath and wiped beneath my eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “To answer your question, I’m not going out with Molly. It didn’t seem right to lead her on when I’m interested in someone else.”

I froze, absorbing his words and the implications they had. By the time I’d turned, mouth open, ready to speak, he’d already opened his door and stepped out. I wanted to reach out after him and yank him back inside the car. If I were more reckless or if I hadn’t needed every single dime I earned working at Lorena Lefray Designs, I’d have jumped on him in a second. I’d have pinned him to the backseat of the town car, straddled his lap, pulled my skirt up, and had my wicked way with him.

If only…

“Are you coming, Jo?” Julian asked, leaning down to peek into my open doorway.

I could have told him everything then. It would have been so easy to come clean. Instead, I accepted his outstretched hand and squeezed my feelings deep, deep down into the pit of my stomach where I could pull them out at night when I lay in bed alone, contemplating how much longer I could get away with pretending that I was anything but hopelessly in love with him.





Chapter Thirty-Four


Julian





I hadn’t talked to Jo in almost two days.

I’d gone thirty-one years without knowing her, yet now it felt wrong to even go one weekend without speaking to her. Things had been tense between us since I’d invited her to have drinks with Dean and me. I should have realized that the night was wrong from the very start. Trying to pick up women around Jo had been an idiotic way to try to push her to admit her feelings for me.

In the end, I’d only succeeded in pushing her further away.

At work, we hardly talked. Our conversations were tense and awkward. Even if I couldn’t get her to love me, I wanted things to go back to how they’d been. Being friends with her was better than nothing.

“Bro! EARTH TO JULIAN!”

Lorena snapped her fingers in front of my face and I flinched back to stare at her. She propped her hands on her hips and stared daggers at me.

“I’ve been calling your name for the last five minutes and you’ve been off in la la land.”

I stared out around my sister’s room, at the boxes ready to be moved to the car waiting outside. We’d spent the morning prepping for her departure from the rehab facility and it was time to head out, back to her old apartment in Brooklyn. Our mother had spent the last few days sprucing it up and getting it ready for her to move back in. I’d already gone through a month earlier and thrown away any reminder of her old life, hunting through her cabinets and drawers and tossing anything that could lead her back down the slippery slope.

“Are you ready?” I asked, wrapping my arm across her shoulders and bringing her in for a hug.

She shrugged. “It’s strange how much this place has come to feel like home.”

“Are you nervous to leave?”

She narrowed her eyes and studied the window on the adjacent wall.

“To be honest, I’m ready to test my willpower in the real world. It wasn’t hard to stay clean in here, but I know my friends will hear that I’ve moved back home and not all of them will support my choices.”

I squeezed her shoulder. “They’re vultures, Lorena. Let them circle overhead while you keep your life on track.”

She frowned and nodded. “I know that, it’s just hard to cut people out of your life like that. Not everything is so simple.”

“Well I’m not planning on rushing back to Boston anytime soon. I’ll drop by and we can hangout.”

She groaned. “Cause hanging out with my big brother is sooo cool.”

“Hey! I’m taking you to the final NYFW show tonight. Doesn’t that count for something?”

“Hey, you’re going as my date!” she said with a laugh. “Look everyone, the phoenix Lorena Lefray, rising from the ashes on the arm of her dorky brother.”

I wasn’t truly excited to go with Lorena to the fashion show. I’d thought of asking Josephine if she’d like to take my place, but it was my sister’s first night back in the real world and I thought it’d be best to stick by her side. She’d been invited to sit in the front row and I’d be sitting there right there beside her.

I smiled. “It still counts. Now, c’mon. Let’s load this stuff up. The car is waiting and if I’m your date you at least owe me dinner first.”

“And here I thought you were easy,” she quipped with a smile.





Chapter Thirty-Five


Josephine





My final night of working at NYFW had finally arrived and I walked in the back entrance of Lincoln Center with mixed emotions. The job had definitely had its rough moments, but I loved being behind the scenes of fashion shows and I was really going to miss the extra income.

With Lily moving to New York soon, I’d be able to make ends meet with just one job, but I still had to help her out until she found a job of her own. She’d been working in restaurants her whole life and had started a food blog a while back. She wasn’t so much a chef as she was a critic. She loved eating good food and prided herself on knowing which restaurants were the best ones in town. New York would be the perfect city for her if only she’d just hurry up and arrive.