Suspicious Minds (Stranger Things Novels #1)(42)

She did. She’d hardly slept the past few nights, every one of them spent at Andrew’s. When he asked if her dorm might notice and object, she’d laughed and said the lab could probably get her out of any trouble over it. So that’s where her head was.

Not in a good place. At all.

She was so tired that reclining on the cot seemed like the best suggestion of her day. She lay back and closed her eyes. Could you sleep through an LSD trip? She could try.

A scraping sound on the floor disturbed her. She opened her eyes to find Brenner sitting in a chair he’d dragged over too close to the bed.

“What’s going on?” she asked.

“We’re going to try something a little different today.” Brenner motioned for the orderly to come in. “Why don’t you go ahead and get her blood samples?”

Terry sat up. “My blood?”

“First session of the month, remember? We always want to check your levels. Make sure you’re healthy and fit, not having a bad reaction to anything.” Dr. Brenner made it sound reasonable. And she did remember them taking blood before.

She nodded, her throat dry. The orderly brought three empty vials over and she watched the needle slip into her skin and the dark liquid seep out into the first one. He filled it and swapped in another. Her stomach flipped, then steadied.

Weird. She never got queasy from a blood draw; that was Becky’s problem. Terry would hold her hand and talk to her, distract her, and still Becky would be about to faint by the time it was over. She couldn’t stand needles.

Terry felt like she was channeling her sister. Whatever Brenner gave her this week must be a particularly strong batch. It usually took longer for the drugs to kick in. Pinwheels whirled at the edges of her vision.

“Now, you have questions for me,” Dr. Brenner said. Terry heard a door open and close, presumably the orderly leaving. “Would you like to ask them?”

Terry would, but her tongue was heavy. “Is this a trick?”

“I don’t know, is it? What do you want to know?”

“I want to know what you’re doing here…What about…” Terry felt like he’d trapped her.

“I’d spoil the experiment if I told you. I’m going to need you to take my word for it that our work her is crucial to the safety of our nation. It can’t be disrupted for any reason. You understand, don’t you?”

“No, I don’t.” She’d answered honestly. Had she meant to? A frozen part of her went back to thinking about Andrew. Somehow that was almost less scary than whatever this was.

“Your purpose is not to know, Terry,” Brenner continued. “Do you understand that, at least? There are consequences for your actions and you should remember that.” He paused and leaned in, putting a sheen of sympathy onto his expression. “I understand you’ve gotten some bad news about your young man.”

Even through the spinning haze at the edges of her vision, what he was saying connected. He couldn’t know that…Not unless…

“You did it.” Again the words slipped free without her meaning to say them.

Brenner gazed at her steadily. “I bet you don’t know what you’d do without him. Say it. That you don’t know.”

She couldn’t seem to stop herself. “I don’t know what I’d do without Andrew.”

“You’re going to find out.” He smiled at her. “Now, close your eyes and go deeper like a good girl. I’m done with you…for today.”

Her eyes slipped closed and she fell into a waking dream.

Keep going, her brain said. Get as far away from him as you can.

A space that was everywhere and nowhere rose around her. A pitch-black void. Her feet were in water.

This felt real, not like the drugs. Not like memories.

It was safer here, safer than where she’d been. Wasn’t it?

A hand on her shoulder brought her back to the room where she really was. She expected Brenner, but instead it was Kali.

Terry hinged upright and searched, wild-eyed, for Brenner. He wasn’t here.

She touched Kali’s hand. The girl was real.

“You never came to see me again,” Kali said.

Terry did her best to process what had happened, what was happening. The edges of her vision spun like plates on fingers, whirling through the air…Don’t drop them…Don’t break…

“What’s wrong with you?” Kali asked. “Are you sick?”

“The man you call Papa—who is he?” Terry asked, searching for her questions. “Your father?”

“He’s Papa,” Kali said, like the answer was obvious and the question dumb. She lowered her voice. “He doesn’t know I’m here.”

Oh no.

“This is dangerous,” Terry said, though she couldn’t remember why. “I’ll find you again, but he can’t know you’re talking to me.”

“He finds out everything.” The girl lifted one shoulder. “No secrets from Papa.”

Terry shook her head. “There can be. He’s just a man. He can’t know everything.” She paused. “Does he hurt you? Papa?”

Kali frowned, but she didn’t answer.

“If he does…I can help you.” Terry had to make her understand.