Surfside Sisters(72)

As he spoke, it occurred to her that her mother would love to talk with Gray about his work. She would be able to understand the technical side of it. She could speak his language, and it would cheer her enormously to be able to be back in that world of the hospital again, her world.

“Gray,” she said impulsively, “I’d love it if one night we could take my mother out to dinner. She’s a nurse, you know, and she’d be fascinated by all this.”

“I’d be very glad to meet your mother,” Gray said solemnly.

Oh, rats, Keely thought. He completely misinterpreted her reason for wanting her mother to meet him. But it was too late now.

“Good,” Keely replied.

“But not the first night I’m there. Let’s have the first night to ourselves. We need some time alone together.”

“I know.” Keely injected warmth into her voice.

“All right, then. I’ll email you my flight information. I’ve reserved a car at the airport. I’ll call you once I’ve checked into the hotel.”

“Great!” Keely said. She wanted to hit her head against the side of the house. “See you soon.”

After their call ended, Keely had to move. She walked around her mother’s garden. The flowers and shrubs were in shades of gray because of the lack of light, but their fragrances were strong.

She forced herself to think about Gray. About making love with him. He was a careful lover, as restrained in passion as he was in the rest of his life. He was diligent about pleasing her, but that very quality irritated Keely. She found him manipulative, as if he considered her similar to one of his patients. She did enjoy being with him, and he did take her places she’d never dreamed of going. But she didn’t love him. And she had to tell him that.

    Her heart ached. Her head ached. She was exhausted and a little bit terrified.

She went into the house and joined her mother as they watched Jimmy Fallon’s late night show.



* * *



—

The next morning, she turned off her phone, made a pot of strong coffee, and sat down at her computer. Work had always been a helpful escape for her from hurt, anticipation, disappointment, and even hope. It was the blessing the gods had given to writers to make up for the curse of living a schizophrenic life, swerving between the isolation needed for work and the fellowship needed for life.

After three hours, she was drained, without another imaginative thought in her head. She dressed in running clothes, waved to her mother, who was once again watching two hyperactive women talk on television, and set off for her run. Her mother’s house was not in the historic district of town. It was a kind of quiet suburb with no views of the sea or the moors. But as Keely ran, she noticed the dreamily purple-blue hydrangea, the New Dawn roses climbing up a lattice attached to a porch, the gleaming brass door knockers, the window boxes overflowing with flowers, the stone bird bath, the two old women sitting and laughing side by side in a garden, drinking tea from teacups, not mugs. The longhaired cat she often saw was sitting in his spot in the window. She waved at him. He was not impressed. It was quiet, except for the occasional sound of lawn mowers, and with the sound came the exceptionally sweet fragrance of newly mown grass.

She returned home dripping, waved at her mother, and headed into the shower. Often when she ran, she returned home with a solution to a problem, but today she was as confused as when she started.

    One day at a time, she told herself. One problem at a time.

Did that mean she considered Gray a problem? Well, yes, she did. Also, she had to tell Sebastian that Gray was coming, and what would that mean? How much would Keely like it if Ebba dropped by the island to visit Sebastian?

She would hate it. She’d be beside herself with jealousy. She’d do something irrational and completely idiotic, like going to a bar and picking up some old high school buddy and going to bed with him.

But she had to think seriously about whatever was going on with Sebastian. It felt like he was headed toward a lifetime commitment. Toward marriage? Her thoughts were racing.

If she was with Sebastian, Isabelle and Tommy, Keely’s first love, would always be in her life. And so would perfect, smug, patronizing Donna Maxwell. Oooh, Donna would not be thrilled about Keely marrying her darling first child.

Plus, there was the unspoken issue of money. Sebastian made his living with his print shop. He couldn’t make a fortune selling his scrimshaw. That was a small specialized market. While Keely made a very nice living from her writing. Amazing, yes, and something she couldn’t count on because publishing was such an unstable business, and personal tastes were so unpredictable. Look at her now, writing like a mad thing revising her novel to satisfy Juan.

Fiona had told her that her new novel had no heart. She said Keely needed to be on Nantucket to regain the power of her emotions and creativity.

Fiona had been right. But could she stay here if she and Sebastian didn’t somehow join their lives together?

Could she stay here if she had Dreadful Donna Maxwell as her mother-in-law?

    Certainly she couldn’t stay here if she married Gray, but she could visit here, and then she wouldn’t need to see the Maxwells except accidentally. But on the other hand, she wanted to renew her friendship with Isabelle. That was important to Keely for so many reasons.

What should she do?