Such a Fun Age(80)



And this was the moment when Alix realized that she’d have to live in Philadelphia both in the flesh and on the Internet. But really, it was about time. Alix had accepted the position at the New School; Emira had accepted her role as a full-time nanny; her editor, Maura, had accepted Alix’s apology and the thirty pages she’d scrounged together over the weekend; and now it was time for Alix to accept that she no longer lived in Manhattan. Alix had somehow walked out of this Kelley Copeland mess unscathed, and her upcoming Philadelphia confession seemed to serve as a secret penance. As Emira and Zara finally emerged from the upstairs bathroom, Emira looking charming and nervous in a way Alix hadn’t seen before, Alix felt prepared not only to represent the city of Philadelphia, but to let Emira represent her too.

As they walked, Zara and Emira swapped a precious exchange before Emira came into the living room and into the light. Laney said, “Let’s have a look.” Briar—in a dark purple wing-collared dress—pointed at Zara and told Emira, “That’s your friend.” Tamra squeezed Briar’s hand and said, “That is Mira’s friend. It’s almost time for you to sit with them, okay?” Emira grinned at Briar and said, “Hey, big girl.”

There were two cameramen and a sound guy set up in the center of the room. The television, an armchair, and two bins of children’s toys were lined up along the wall behind them. Laney was at the helm. She circled the room as she double-checked all angles, numbers, and light sources. She showed no qualms with telling her team, “Nope, not good enough,” and watching while they tried again. Alix felt na?ve to see that Laney wasn’t just a talking head on television but the executive producer of this upcoming segment that would be broadcast live on WNFT Morning News. In a bright green blouse that tied at the side of her neck, Laney stood in front of Alix and Emira and took them in. “Let’s get Miss Briar in here too?” Laney called. With Catherine babbling in one arm, Tamra delivered Briar’s hand to Alix. “Mama?” Briar pointed to one of the cameramen. “I want—I want . . . that man has glasses.”

“So Emira, let’s add the cream-colored cardigan on top, I think that’ll look really nice,” Laney said. “And Alix, let’s get a little more powder right here on you. Just a tiny bit.” Laney pointed with her pinkies to the space on the inside of her own eyelids.

Tamra called, “Got it,” and went to receive a square of foundation. When Zara realized that the cardigan retrieval was in her purview, she mouthed, Oh, das me, okay, and jogged to retrieve it from the front vestibule. She tiptoed into the camera light and handed her friend the knitted sweater before backing out and leaning against the living room door frame.

Once Alix and Emira made the corrections, Laney told them to take a seat on the couch. Alix’s house suddenly seemed like one large prop, and she wished she could go back and add Philadelphia-purchased touches that could make her feel more connected to the space. But now that Emira would be spending so much time here, Alix would have another reason to make it feel like home. Alix sat next to Emira on the couch as Laney straightened Briar’s dress across Emira’s knees. Briar pointed up at Emira and said, “You got sparklers on you face.”

“Okay, ladies. Great.” Laney sat in her own chair across from Emira’s end of the couch. “So it’s just like we talked about. Keep your answers to one or two sentences long. Legs shut, eyes open. And don’t be afraid to take your time. We’ve got a whole four minutes, okay? Bri, sweetie? Look up at me.” Laney snapped her fingers twice in the air, and Briar looked at her as if she’d shouted this information. “So you gotta stay with Emira and be the big sister today, yes?” Laney nodded four times and answered the question for herself. “Yes, ma’am. Big sister. Garret, gimme an ETA?”

One of the cameramen took his face away from the equipment to adjust his headpiece and say, “We’re on in two minutes.” Alix reached over and squeezed the top of Emira’s hand, grazing the sides of her daughter’s knee. This was a first for her too. She’d never been on the local news. Much like Thanksgiving, Alix foresaw this four-minute segment as a moment that would unite her and Emira in a way that neither of them could ever take back. Alix felt woozy off how pretty Emira looked, how graciously she’d accepted Alix’s advice all weekend, and how she was now in her home without being paid. Alix adjusted her posture one last time as Laney led the women in a silent group breath. “Just stay with me,” Laney whispered, and smiled. “You’re gonna hear Misty and Peter first and then I’ll lead you in.”

From the little black speaker balanced next to the sound man’s feet, Alix heard a buzz and then the familiar sound of WNFT’s theme music. The sound guy bent to turn up the volume and stood once again with the boom outstretched over their heads.

“Welcome back to WNFT. You’re probably wondering where Laney is right now,” Misty said, “and that leads us to our main story. It’s not often that a segment hits this close to home, but this one is currently taking place inside Peter’s home!” There was a pause, and while Alix couldn’t see her husband, she imagined he was doing a sheepish but charming what are ya gonna do face while admitting guilt with a raised hand. Misty went on as Alix curved her tongue around her front teeth one last time. “This weekend, a video went viral which showed twenty-five-year-old Temple graduate Emira Tucker being accused of kidnapping by a security guard at Market Depot. Emira was not committing a crime—rather, she was babysitting. And Peter, I’ll pass it on to you because you know Emira and the child in question quite well.”

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