Stay(26)

Salt fills my mouth. We’re sweaty and hot, and the scent of leather and flowers and sex surrounds us.

I thought I’d embellished our first time in my imagination, remembering it as better than it was.

I was wrong.

It really was that good.

Large hands grip my ass, moving me up and down. Our rhythm, our chemistry is on fire. My eyes close, and I’m burning in a sea of desire, orgasm licking my inner thighs like flames.

My pelvis shudders as I come again. My inner muscles clench around him, pulling him deeper. He speaks low and dirty words, telling me what he wants, telling me to take him more, all the way. When he comes, he groans loud and rises to his feet. Pressing my back against the bar, he holds himself deep, rocking his hips firmly in place.

Nothing is sexier than this arrogant man losing his precious control between my thighs. He pulses, filling the condom. My arms are around his neck and his cheek rests against my temple. Our breathing slowly returns to calm.

Lowering my legs, my hands slide down his muscled arms as I stand, trying to get my balance. He disposes of the condom before coming back to me. Then he does the unexpected. He pulls me to him, holding me against his bare chest.

It’s not like the last time, our first time. We’re skin against skin, and his palms are flat against my skin. It’s intimate and quiet. His lips touch my temple, and I wonder how it’s possible he feels so right…

No, he’s not right. He’s bossy and proud. He said if he wanted to have sex with me, he would. Oh, my God…

He did.

The reality of what I’ve done slams into me like a freight train.

I take a step back, out of his arms, straightening my bra and pulling the sleeves of my dress up quickly. “I have to go.”

“Wait.” He steps forward. “Stay…”

“I’ve got to get out of here.” My head is all mixed up, and I grab the white shirt off the floor. I jam my arms into the sleeves, not even bothering with the knot.

What the hell was I thinking coming here tonight? Of course, I had sex with him, because clearly, I’m just the girl who can’t say no to Stephen Hastings.

“Let me drive you back.” He grabs a set of keys off a hook.

“No… I’m leaving, and I’m doing it without you!”

Cringing, I know I’ve made a critical error. I actually thought I was over this guy. I actually thought I was in control. I was a fool. And I was so, so wrong. This is Stephen Hastings we’re talking about, my kryptonite.

“What about—”

“I am not moving in with you.”

“Emmy, stop this. Right now.” His voice has taken that tone. Mr. Bossy.

I’m not having it. Scooping up my purse, I fly out the door, jogging down the steps and racing to the subway stairs before he can follow me.



* * *



If I wanted to have sex with you, I’d have sex with you…

“Great job, Em. What else would you do if he wanted?” I’m pacing in a circle around my apartment, thinking how easy it was… How long it’s been… My arms are crossed tight over my chest, and I’m fighting to get my raging emotions under control.

Or my hormones.

Or both.

Scanning the small space, my lips tighten. Yes, my apartment is a dump compared to his townhome. “But it’s cozy and it’s clean!” I shout, fluffing the couch pillows. “I am not moving in with Stephen Hastings.”

I couldn’t even make it through dinner without attacking him. I’m supposed to hate him. Remember? One shot of a ripped torso, and all bets are off. Damn hormones.

I grab my phone, typing out a text to Eli. How did it go today?

Seconds pass. I put my phone down and walk to the kitchen to get some water. I hear my phone buzz and run back, scooping it up as I hop on my bed.

You shouldn’t have left that way. Stephen’s words make my heart sputter.

For a second, all I can do is stare at the face. Then I shake it off and get myself together. Setting my jaw, I tap out a reply. It was time for me to go.

Why?

“Why?” I say out loud. Okay, I know he can’t hear me.

Lines were crossed. It was exactly what I thought would happen. I sit back and smile at my ability to cut to the point.

We’re consenting adults. Why shouldn’t we have sex if we want?

My brow furrows. Stephen might be a little better at cutting to the point than I am.

Because I don’t want to have sex with you! I hesitate before hitting send.

Liar. I can almost feel his eye roll through the ether. You enjoyed it as much as I did. And stop saying you hate me.

A knot is in my throat, and I try to swallow it away. Maybe I don’t hate you.

You don’t say?

Nope. I do hate you.

A few second pass, and I’m fuming again at his arrogance. The gray bubble appears then disappears. Appears, disappears. I don’t know if it means he changed his mind on what to say or if he’s sending me an epistle.

My phone buzzes, and I’m ready to go off, until I see it’s a reply from Eli.

Not bad. Tired. Will be glad to be home.

My chest pulls. Everything okay, baby?

Moooooom.

Again, I swallow a knot in my throat. Sorry! It’s a habit. Everything okay, my big strong man?