Start a War (Saint View Psychos #1)(66)

He stared at me, mulling something over in his head. Eventually, he nodded and pushed off the table to go to the lamp. “One time, Bliss. You get tonight in the dark, because I can see I’ve probably already pushed you out of your comfort zone. After tonight, every time I fuck you, it’s gonna be with the lights on. Don’t deprive me of watching you.”

I sucked in a breath at the promise. At the idea he’d even want to see me.

Caleb had never come right out and said it, but I’d always suspected he’d never wanted the lights on because he was too busy picturing someone else beneath him.

War bent over and flicked the switch on the lamp, plunging the room into darkness once more. “Take your jeans off, Bliss,” he said again.

My heart pounded, but God, I wanted to. Even if this was just a quick screw with the rest of our clothes still on, I wanted to feel him inside me. My core begged to be filled.

The darkness was familiar and comforting. It wasn’t absolute, but it was enough to feel sexy. He would only see my outline, a dark figure moving in the shadows, not all the little lumps and bumps and rolls I hated.

He sat on the side of the bed, the springs squeaking slightly beneath his weight.

I stepped out of my heels, my bare feet finding the scuffed wood floorboards. I undid the button on my jeans and then the zipper on my fly before pushing them down my legs and toeing them off.

“Panties too.”

I couldn’t breathe. Caleb had never made me feel like this. There’d never been any sort of foreplay or buildup with him. It was just him rolling on top of me and pushing his dick between my legs, whether I was ready or not. I’d gotten used to it, but it was never particularly fun for me. I’d always had to go to the bathroom later and handle it myself if I wanted to come. Most of the time I didn’t bother.

I tucked my fingers into the sides of my panties and lowered them to the floor, barely daring to breathe.

War stood so we were face-to-face. His fingers found my chin, and he tilted my face up. “You like it when I tell you what to do.”

It was more of a statement than a question.

I nodded. All I’d ever done in the past was lie quietly beneath men while they grunted and sweated over me. I didn’t know anything else. Caleb never even kissed me in public, let alone pulled me onto his lap and told me to grind on him. I needed War’s guidance.

“Good girl.” He kissed me deeply, his tongue plunging into mine. It was so sexy I almost forgot I was half naked.

His fingers found the hem of my top, and he lifted it over my head. The shirt joined the rest of my clothes on the floor, and a moment later, my bra was beside them too.

“Just how I like my women,” War purred in my ear. “Fully naked before I’ve even taken my cut off. If we’re in here, baby girl, I don’t ever want you in clothes.”

I wasn’t experienced enough for this man and his mouth. He was the starring character in every sex dream I’d ever had. In those dreams, I was just as confident as he was.

The reality was very different.

“Hold on to the bed frame.”

I had no idea what he was doing. But I did as he said, crawling across the bed to kneel at the top. I placed both hands on the wrought iron that decorated the headboard.

I didn’t dare look over my shoulder at him when the bed dipped and squeaked behind me. He moved in close, still fully clothed, so he was kneeling right behind me.

His hand landed on the back of my neck, squeezing tightly. His palm was warm, and the tight grip turned into a kneading massage, his fingers digging into the tense muscles there before slowly moving lower. His massage became a featherlight touch, dancing down my spine and fluttering over my lower back. There, it smoothed out into a flat palm against my skin, sliding down until he cupped a handful of my ass. “Gonna spank you now, baby girl.”

Without waiting for me to say yes or no, his palm connected sharp and fierce with my naked behind.

I yelped, not at the pain, but at the pleasure it sent spinning straight into my core. A gush of arousal bloomed there.

War’s palm smoothed over the sting, massaging it away. “I don’t ever want to hear you talk about yourself like you did just before. It’s insulting. To you, and to me for wanting your body the way it is.”

I nodded quickly. Though I knew it wouldn’t be that simple. I couldn’t simply turn off years of hating the way I looked just because he told me to. But for tonight, I could pretend I could.

“Spread your legs. I’m gonna kneel there.”

I widened my knees, and War moved between them, his hands roaming all over my ass. Every now and then, his erection, still locked behind his jeans, brushed against me, but he never let me feel it properly.

“You wet for me, Bliss?”

I nodded.

“I want to feel it.”

I let out a tiny moan of approval. He moved in closer, one hand circling around to the front to stroke my pussy.

His finger found my clit, and at the same time, his palm smacked my ass again.

The feeling was electric. I slumped forward onto the headboard, while War made encouraging little noises in the back of his throat. “I’ve got you.”

He picked up the pace on my clit, rubbing two fingers in circles over it while he spanked me again. Every time his hand landed on my ass, it was with a practiced speed and strength that left me tingling and wanting more, rather than actually in pain. My ass would be pink, no doubt, but not bruised.